- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
This is hard! You are not alone in feeling this way. It’s sounds like a compulsion of yours is to ask him for reassurance- “checking to make sure he still likes you”. Next time, maybe try to see how long you can go without asking for reassurance. Instead, distract yourself by going outside, singing a song, etc. Try to have longer and longer time intervals from feeling the anxiety and the time You ask for reassurance. It’s hard! It makes you feel lonely, worried you might lose him, etc. He has stayed even during the times you thought he was going to leave.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thank you! I really appreciate your response. I am starting today about trying to stop asking for reassurance. It is difficult! I did do ERP today, and my ERP exercise was geared more towards it is possible “x” can happen or it is possible “y” can happen and to just be okay with the uncertainty and listening to my recordings over and over again until I feel okay with it. Getting out of the house also helps a lot. Thank you 😊
- Date posted
- 3y ago
If you can, don't try ignore your OCD - challenge it. Tell yourself that yeah, he might find other girls attractive, but he trusts me enough to say so. What's more loyal than that?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
If you've really tried everything, I don't know. It's hard to say. But tbh, you're lucky right now. Now I don't mean what you're going through is good, it's not. We guys says stupid stuff all the time. But honestly if he can admit that to you straight up that he can find other girls attractive and still daybthat he wants to be with you than you must be a prize to him. You need to not worry about something like this, I know it's hard with uncertainty but it doesn't seem like he'll just ditch you.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Thank you! I appreciate this because I know what you mean, the situation could be much worse. My boyfriend is very loving and supportive of me and I know he would never do anything to hurt me… I don’t know why this bothers me so much, but I’m trying to work and get a handle on it now
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 16w ago
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
- Date posted
- 12w ago
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
- Date posted
- 6w ago
Hey guys! My boyfriend has said recently that he doesn't know if he's strong enough to continue with our relationship because of my OCD. He wants to see me overcome my symptoms and learn to live a healthy life with OCD, but my anxieties and obsessions are starting to really affect his life. I understand his reasoning, it's hard to see someone you care about struggle with OCD, especially when it starts to affect you too. I'm asking for tips to deal with my compulsions in the relationship. I HAVE to know the answer to things and sometimes that leads into arguments because even with apologies and discussions I can't let things go, even if they genuinely don't matter or are miniscule issues we have. It's a healthy relationship otherwise but I feel horrible because it's impacting him so negatively, that's the absolute last thing I want to happen. I care for him deeply and he cares for me too, so I don't want my OCD to be a reason we break up but I fear it's headed in that direction. I'm starting therapy soon, but until then what are some things I can do to stop my ROCD from impacting him? I know sitting in the guilt and anxiety of not completing my obsessions will help, but I'm wondering if there are other things I can do to maybe remedy some of the damage already done.
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