my OCD has caused my marriage to start to fail because I cannot controls my impulses and get very angry when I can’t make someone understand. Does anyone have advice on how I could controls the anger better or make my spouse understand?

It sounds like your family is not enabling your compulsions which is ultimately a good thing - even tho right now it probably feels really frustrating! My partner won’t follow my rules for cleanliness and order either, and while it stresses me out, now that I’m in therapy I understand he’s actually helping me get healthier since I need to fight these compulsive desires. Maybe try to see these moments as opportunities to try ERP - reframing it as an opportunity might help with the anger. Also re: anger, have you tried ACT exercises? I do square breathing (a kind of deep breathing) to calm down. One thing too is to let your partner know that while you’re fighting these compulsions you may feel distressed - and that distress is definitely real! So while my partner won’t enable my compulsive behavior, he has learned to empathize with me (saying he understands I’m upset, giving hugs, engaging me in conversation, going for a walk together, etc). I’m sorry you’re struggling with this and hope you feel better soon

What have you been doing to control your OCD? Counceling Medication Therapy (look at this website for info) Try some or all of these ideas. OCD and marriage are both full time jobs. You have to work with them

@MustacheUA It’s okay, I get what you’re saying. Remember that this is OCD and not you. If you haven’t explained it that way to your spouse yet, I believe you should. It may clear up a lot of issues. Think of OCD as a bully constantly shouting criticism. The bully’s goal is to hurt you, but he/she is discouraged if you ignore him/her. Cleanliness, tidiness, and organization are all good but, as you know, OCD loves to use them to agitate us. When you start feeling anxious about about these things, try to remember the bully and treat it likewise.

@axolotl is 100% right one of the best answers ever seen for a response like this.

I won’t pressure you if you don’t want to, but do you mind going into further detail about your OCD? I might be able to give you more specific tips.

Mine is I have a obsess with cleaning and keeping things in Ofer 100% of the time. As my daughter plays and stops playing with a toy I have to put it away. Or when something is not put away right away seems to trigger it. Then when I begin to fix it or ask for help my family just tells me to calm down they will witch makes it worse. I know that’s a bad description but that the best I really can do.

Thank you all very much. This helps so much!!