- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I'm with you 100 percent, ocd flipped my life upside down. I will say that I am not completely healed, far from it, but I have made some progress, and it didn't happen until I began erp and committed to trying it consistently for at least a week or so. Erp is freaking terrifying, it still scares me, but I found that once I had done it for several days consistently, I noticed how when you do the scary thing, nothing bad actually happens except for a feeling of discomfort within you, which goes away eventually. It takes practice and I think a big part of it is a leaped faith, be willing to take the risk with erp, cause if you go into it unwilling, it won't work as well.
- Date posted
- 4y
I just don't understand ERP for real event because these things really happened. I get false memories too. I just don't know how to do it and when I do it'll be terrifying.
- Date posted
- 4y
@BigGip09 The point of erp is really to expose you to fears, whether it's real event or any other theme. Even though it may be real event ocd, the fact remains that it gives you fear and anxiety, so by exposing yourself to that thing or the thought of it, you're desensitized your nervous system to the fear you normally associate it. The point of erp is not to disprove the fear, it's to live with the fear without that fear controlling us with the obsessive compulsive cycle. Hope that makes sense a little better
- Date posted
- 4y
@Whatabtme This!!! I'm also dealing with false memory and real event. It's so tough just letting things be you know? I needed to read this. Thank you for the words of encouragement.
- Date posted
- 4y
@Whatabtme What if after all of that work it actually comes true though?
- Date posted
- 4y
The last paragraph struck me hard. This is so hard :( I'm sorry were going through this, but there's a way through. I'm not quite there yet, but I believe in both of us!
- Date posted
- 4y
I feel you. Its so hard to give ourselves grace. Its not our faults that we have these thoughts. Its a brain issue but we can live life despite it given the right tools. I know it may seem hopeless but having OCD isnt hopeless. You will find your way and you will find freedom from porn as well. Im trying to free myself from that too. Its a topic im trying to focus on with my therapist soon. Best of luck to you
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hi, last year I had a trigger with my little cousin that made me spiral. Then that thought lead to another and lead to another thought and another one and so on and I've been feeling stuck (with ups and downs) over a year now. I hit rock bottom in July/August and that lead me to going to the psychiatrist. I am taking meds now, but I still feel bad. It doesn't take as much time of my life anymore but it is constantly back there in my mind. It's the feeling that I'm ignoring and undoubtable truth that soonest or later will come out, or that rejecting, or that I'm resisting. That's why it's been impossible for me to do ERP, because I think it's going to make me want to touch myself and if I do I'll feel bad. And then it feels like I like the thoughts, not only physically (groinals) but mentally??? It's like a brain fog that I can't tag between pleasure or confusion. And that thought leads me to thinking about the alleged "non-offending" ps and if that could be me. And that thought leads me to think OH MY GOD I can't BELIEVE I am a girl in my twenties obsessing over this I can't believe this is my life.
- Date posted
- 20w
I can be way too hard on myself and beat myself up over the smallest slip up in regards to OCD. Sometimes it can feel like I'm gaslighting myself on what was "so blatantly and obviously a moral atrocity in thought and intent", when 95% of the time I'm not even sure what my own intent with dealing with these thoughts is or why I do what I do. It makes me feel like some shameless beast for "daring to even entertain the thought of something so VILE!!!" When I just get so confused and scared on moral issues, like my mind is pulled down a rabbit hole I can't escape until the tricks are done on me and it's too late, i've accepted such ideas I hate until that hate and trying to not give in convince me "it might not be that bad". It feels like anything, even the most mundane things can trigger this. This cycle happens mainly because I feel like there's "no way to escape committing more 'attrocities' in thought or compulsion anyway"...and these cycles become the basis for more of these incidents. there a way to stop this? There have been multiple times where I called myself the R word, and even knowing it's a slur I still called myself that because "I'm nothing if not deserving of such scorn". Any attempt to stop the madness makes it worse and it's like all this I talked about is so convincing I dare not question it until after the fact. Please help.
- Date posted
- 19w
Hi - just for some context, I have OCD and ADHD. I hate bringing this up, but with these diagnoses, when intertwined, there is ALWAYS a thought. I never stop thinking. This is really hard, especially because I feel like I always need to be talking to someone. Whether it’s my friends or family, talking to people brings me down to earth from certain kinds of thought spirals. However, when I’m alone it is the hardest. When my friends don’t reply I have this compulsion to text again or I need to constantly check my notifications so that I have none left to check. But then to them or new people I talk to, this behavior probably comes across as overwhelming or too much. I’m trying to control it and use erp, but also, I have my moments where I’m just vunerable and give into the compulsion. It’s genuinely so embarassing and maybe not as big a deal as I’m making it out to be but, how do I manage? And how do I relax?
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