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I would be careful asking this. You have some sort of fear (that your relationship needs fixing) and are looking for some sort of strategy to fix the problem which is not recommended for those that struggle with OCD. There may or may not be problems in your relationship. Right now, if you are struggling with ROCD, you may not be in a place to know, because everything is a problem with ROCD. So the first step is really to focus on recovery rather than trying to fix a problem with the relationship. With that said, I have been practicing ACT (Acceptance Commitment Therapy; it was recommended on the OCD Stories Podcast) approaches and exercises lately to help with intrusive thoughts and rumination, and those have helped me deal with feelings of disconnection from my gf when my intrusive thoughts appear. And of course check out some resources on ERP as well.
I love you name on here! And yes I agree with that! Asking for reassurance isn't going to help in the long run :(
Ugh...following. same. I blame ocd
I had that in the past. And it still happens to me sometimes. Just remember it's just another way for the ocd to get your attention. When my ocd was at its worst I was so confused about my feelings, because anxiety took its place. Now when I feel like that I try (I know it's hard) to ignore the feeling and live like it wasn't there. Because for me at least, the feeling of disconnect/not knowing him comes when my anxiety spikes (even though every time I think oh no this time it is true, but it never turns out to be lol) . And when it goes down again I can't even relate to that feeling anymore, so for me it's a theme. But if you truly feel disconnected and it's not a theme (which I can fully understand bc ocd can be so isolating) , then you can just try to maybe open up more to him, or go on nice dates with another. Be kind to him and let him be kind to you. Maybe light some candles and watch a movie, just be romantic and allow yourself to relax, not expecting to feel anything.
But yeah I think my personal experience is that it's a theme. So don't give it attention, and don't forget doing your erp's :)
i don’t even have any anxiety with the thoughts right now because i’m so numb to everything
Have your feelings come back for your bf? I find that my anxiety has gone away, as so have most of the Intrusive thoughts, but 4 months later and I still don’t have feelings for my bf. I know I love him but I just wanna feel that love
my anxiety has also gone away. yet i feel so numb to everything still especially him
I have been there too. I mean it's so different for everyone and I can only speak for myself. But often my ocd tried to convince myself that not feeling overly excited all the time means I don't love him, but that's not true. Anxiety can makes us so depressed that it's just hard to feel things. Anxiety makes you numb. If you say you know you love him then trust your feeling. But remember. Love isn't always infatuation or intense feelings. It can just be expressed in wanting to spend time with someone and just liking their company. Love isn't always super intense.
Also: for me ocd tried to convince me that I wasn't anxious anymore, that now the thoughts were just true. Turns out, once again that was a lie for me. I was anxious but it didn't feel like it
Yea that’s how my ocd tells me to.
feeling the exact same way also like i don’t even care anymore
I feel numb towards my partner? I know I dont want to leave him but I havr no anxiety anymore, and I just feel numb and a little weird towards him. I want this to stop
Well my morning started off with the question “am I emotionally connected with my boyfriend?” It’s making me feel nervous and anxious. I’m scared again. I feel like I’m passed the whole “sexual attraction” thing. Now I’m just worried if I don’t connect with the opposite sex. My boyfriend is my best friend. We laugh together, we tell each other everything, we support each other. But I’m So scared. What if I don’t love him like I thought I did? I just now read articles on this stuff. “Signs you’re attached to your partner but not love them” , “signs you’re emotionally connected” , and all theses different ones. I hate this, why can I just be happy. Seriously, I can’t believe this Is happening to me. Can anyone give me any advice? Please.
It’s sad to me that I haven’t been feeling larger amounts of attraction towards my partner recently makes me scared that my fears about not loving him anymore are true. I used to feel like I just wanted to be with him and talk with him a lot but now I feel more like I want to do projects or Art a lot of the time and it makes me worried that something is wrong. When we do engage in sexual activity I feel very not in the moment which is also super upsetting. I just want to go back to how it used to be.
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