God I can’t take this anymore I can’t live with these thoughts and feelings anymore..does anyone else’s brain make them doubt that their worries are okay and making up reasons for it. I’ve been battling the thought of me like humping a baby and leaving me feel like I want to do it but in reality I would never hurt a child. These thoughts are so hard and I feel so ashamed and frustrated. I feel like every time I try and reassure myself I get this woosh of anxiety and makes me feel like I’m lying to myself

Thank you. Everyday though I feel like im arguing with my brain and all my brain tells me is that I want to do it and now whenever I ask myself I don’t even know anymore. All my brain thinks about is the sexual side of it. I could never hurt a baby but this is so convincing. I know if I really wanted to I would’ve by now, but I can’t cope with this uncertainty

OCD will often target your root fear in the most depraved ways, because it's TRYING to get your get attention. If you ignore it usually but respond when it brings up images of assaulting children, naturally it's going to do it more. The thing to explore (with a therapist, ideally) is why this is such a big fear for you. If you did end up hurting a child, what would you believe about yourself? What are you afraid will happen? You probably engage in compulsions regarding that fear in lots of ways, but this is the only way your brain can get you to listen.

I’ve had thoughts like this before. How I beat it is that I think “Oh, that random thought again, with that weird reaction. You do you body, I’ll do me.” Think of it as a guy having an erection for no reason. It happens to all of them, and it can even happen with us women. The body doesn’t mean to, it’s just OCD sending false signals.

Hi, thank you for that. It’s just the thoughts that scare me the most. I guess cause I’m sexual and I’m insecure about myself in that way

Yeah I have this problem with hocd and it kills me cause I've always wanted to have a wife. And now I have a beautiful girlfriend the love of my life but I still battle these thoughts daily. I'm on that same boat where my brain is sending me these thoughts of me doing gay stuff and it kills me and I hate it. What sucks more is that at times it's very convincing but in the bottom of my heart I know I'm only straight no matter how much OCD tries to convince me otherwise.

I have a little sexican brain myself. I’ve used outlets for it before, with sex toys myself, but trust me, OCD is just confusing your body.

Thanks guys. I feel like this may have rooted from when I was a child and I sexually explored by humping my baby doll. I know that I would never hurt a baby in reality for my pleasure cause that’s wrong, but I just feel like my mind tricks me :(

We do crazy things as babies. I might have kissed my cousin when I was a tot, and my nephew has touched himself in front of the fam. Apparently it’s normal, which weirded me out.

It is very normal as children we are curious. But they thiughts are so hard it really feels like I want to do it when in reality I know I wouldn’t want to

I understand completely. I research stuff a lot and finding the right info helps.

I just wish I could be hypnotised so I don’t have these thoughts anymore. I feel like such a fucked up person

Same. Learning to let them flow is really hard, because OCD tortures you on the side

Yep and I feel guilty for dismissing the thoughts because I feel like they’re so bad and apart of me now

Agree with everything in this thread. Sooo much of this has happened to me. It’s the feeling of “do I want this?” That is the worst. For me, it comes in a quick flash, forcing me to ruminate even more

Though it might be a compulsion in itself sometimes.

As much as it is a compulsion me searching stuff like is it normal for a child to do this etc has reassured me so much

Indeed.