- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I can’t even type with confidence that I love my partner, which reinforces obsession. I get triggered when people say “ I know I love my partner but…” because I feel like I can’t even say that, S if I don’t know for sure…then I have these moments of clarity sometimes where I feel immense love for my partner, and I say it by accident…it’s all very confusing. I love my partner. Fuck, that was distressing to type haha.
- Date posted
- 3y
Big respect for this
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
1. Get off the NOCD app and stop posting. Iv noticed that you constantly ask for reassurance in your posts. This is a compulsion and will only fuel your OCD. 2. Get off of forums like Reddit and google. This as well will only fuel your OCD, and when you think you’ve found your “answer” OCD will just come back with more doubt. 3. Find a therapist who you can talk to and start therapy . NOCD has great therapist who can definitely help you. And therapy as well as ERP is what is going to help you get better. 4. Certainy is an illusion at best; nothing in life is 100% certain. Iv seen you struggle for a long time. And you will only get better if you stop with the complusions and let uncertainty in. I know how hard it is to want to feel like you again, to want to feel the love for your partner, but posting and ruminating about it and wishing it isn’t going to change anything. You getting help is the first step. Best Wishes.
- Date posted
- 3y
This is such a good post..do you have any more tips. I'm gonna make this my phone wallpaper cause it applies to me too el
- Date posted
- 3y
A "what if" doubt!! A lot of "what if doubts" actually! Remember what I told you in the previous post!! And DO IT I know you FEEL that it is the right thing to do. break up; is not the answer. Or better, is the answer if you want to lose him. You don't need to feel the sparkle to know that you love him. It's a choice. If you want to stay, stay, even if you don't feel so.
- Date posted
- 3y
Nobody even knows what the legitimate reasons for attracting to someone are or staying with them. So why should your attraction be any more or less valid for any particular reasons? Whether because of attachment or ROCD or anything else who cares about any of the indirect evidence. Only the direct evidence that you choose to stay with each other in this particular moment matters, not the ex
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s just…. Sunday I did amazing. I knew I love him and knew I wanted to stay and then stressful things happen and I start thinking negatively. The thing is I stayed off of Reddit and the NOCD app all day Sunday. I did amazing. He even gave me a lay down hug and it made me happy. But now it’s like I don’t love him and I am just denying my true feelings. I kept telling myself this is just a dream a really bad dream. 😖 I don’t want to break up but it’s like I just want to leave…😞
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
What if I really don’t like my partner? What if I’m gaslighting myself into thinking that my intuition could be OCD? What if we’re just not meant to be? I’m so confused
- Date posted
- 25w
I am in a relatively new relationship (around 2 months) and it has been completely virtual due to varying circumstances. I have never been in a serious relationship before and my past “exes” have never been this serious or brought up any of these feelings. About a month in I started having tons of symptoms and thoughts I figured were due to an SSRI change (i eventually went back to my original med/dose) however, it has remained quite bad since. Thoughts include: -I don’t actually like my partner, I just like the feeling of being wanted -I have crushes on other people, including my partners friends who I barely know -I don’t feel butterflies so I must be losing feelings for him -I think he’s ugly/im just not attracted to him -I’m secretly a lesbian and I’m wasting his time by being with him -a general feeling of dread, wrongness, or needing out of the relationship -not being able to believe him when he reassures me about everything -all of the above is just my genuine feelings and I’m using ocd as an excuse These are obviously crazy things to think, however one of my biggest compulsions is confession and self sabotage so I have told my partner all of these things in detail. He’s really great and patient about all of it but I can tell it weighs on him. Hes even recently expressed feeling like it’s his fault and that he wonders if it wouldn’t be this bad if I was with someone else. I feel so miserable but i feel like I’d be miserable in any relationship but im scared that’s not the truth and my ocd isn’t real. When it’s good i feel the most romantic love for him I’ve ever felt toward anyone ever. He’s an incredible person but I just feel so alone and lost on what to do. I’ve literally tried to break up with him like five times and each time we’ve ended up wanting to stay together. I’m really really scared I’ll never get better or this is simply the wrong relationship for me.
- Date posted
- 16w
Right now I feel like I’ve realized something awful. Like maybe… I never truly loved my boyfriend. Maybe in the beginning I was just excited to be in a relationship. Maybe I confused that excitement with real love. And when the intrusive thoughts started, maybe it wasn’t ROCD — maybe it was the truth hitting me. I write this and it feels real. That’s the scariest part. It feels calm and clear and like maybe I’ve just been lying to myself all along, holding on because I “should,” not because I truly want to. I can’t remember how it felt to love him — and that makes it worse. I feel so disconnected, so numb, like nothing makes sense anymore. Every time I try to feel something for him, it feels like I’m faking it. Like I’m playing a role, not being myself. But the thing is… I’m not at peace. If this was really the truth, why does it hurt so much? Why does this “realization” come with panic, guilt, emptiness, and so much fear? I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lose him. But I also don’t want to keep living like this — doubting myself, my feelings, and my past. I feel like I’m stuck in a cycle I can’t break, and I’m scared I’ll always feel this way. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
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