Has anybody else became someone totally different after your ocd experience? I miss the old me but some parts of me have changed for the better

So many people on here struggle with thinking about what they miss doing or feeling before their OCD theme hit. Some miss being attracted to the opposite sex and feeling giddy talking to a cute guy at the super market, others miss being able to sit with their partners in peace on the couch, others miss cooking with sharp knives without having thoughts about anything but the food in front of them. What do you miss? I miss feeling like I had a strong sense of self and identity. I miss doing or saying something and thinking, “yeah, that’s the type of person I am! And I’m proud!” Now, I say/do stuff and think, “well that’s how the old me would have done it, and I’m not sure what else to do. But it doesn’t really feel like it’s coming from me anymore. It’s just, a habit. My whole personality and identity is just performing a habit. And I have no idea what to replace it with cause I can’t seem to access the “real me” anymore.”

OCD can be anywhere from bothersome to devastating. For many of us, this is the hardest, most painful part of our life. Yet somehow pain has a way of making us into really special people if we let it… How has OCD changed your life for the better? I’m in the thick of my journey right now, I start erp therapy next week. Its tempting to feel alone, bitter, and like I’m the only one who has ever experienced this. I am looking for hope from those who have walked this road before me!

Do you ever feel like you've been two different people in this life? One prior to getting proper help for your OCD and a different person after ERP? For me, whether right or wrong, I still sometimes refer to myself as "the old me," referring to before I got help. Am I the only one?