- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
i relate to this so much. i still struggle with trying to feel love or try to not think of him as a stranger because i get so numb. it’s normal i promise it gets better! i haven’t told my partner either because it’s hard and i haven’t been ready. i use to cry all night while he was sleeping and i would just constantly feel scared or guilty.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
for me ignoring it makes it worse for a bit but it does get better. ocd gets desperate when u ignore it and just fires intrusive or unwanted thoughts to try and get u back in the cycle. from reading this u clearly love him your ocd is just trying to take control right now! luckily there’s a lot of people here who have had to go though the same thing and we all aren’t alone.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Oh hunny you don’t have to end the relationship you should try to fill him in on what’s going on. I’m sure he can feel the change . Is he an understanding partner?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
He wants to know what’s wrong asking if I’m okay all the time but I try to avoid telling him and just try to deal with on my own.. it’s becoming too much now… I’ve never felt this way for him in the whole 11 1/2 years of being together…. I try to sit with the feeling and ignore it but that made it worse….. right I believe I don’t love him but it hurts so much bc I don’t want this to be true…😢😢😢😭😭
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I’m just so tired… mentally and physically
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I see . You have been with your partner a long time . You know you love him and you don’t want the relationship to end . These thoughts truly are just thoughts and reacting to them make them feel real. The trick is not reacting to these thoughts or trying to push them away . They are just thoughts. Sitting with your thoughts and feelings does work but only if you are not trying to fight it. It takes time and practice but you will be ok. Try to seek out additional support don’t deal with this alone . You don’t have to suffer .
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
The fact that you feel so awful and want to love him the way you did before and don’t want to leave means that you do love him the same as you did but this disorder makes you paranoid and question everything about even your very exsistence. It is just ocd. I’ve went through severe Rocd before and was terrified I know it seems simpler to deal with it alone but you should tell him and it’s scary But if they know who you are and take into account all your time and everything you’ve been through they will understand. It’s not you it’s you brain. Ocd attacks the things we care about the most and unfortunately uncertainty is part of it. You have to disregard and tell yourself even if it’s a 100 times a day no im fine I love him and that’s all I need to go on because it is just this disorder trying to take away the most important things to you. It feels real it feels uncomfortable it feels like everything is falling apart and that’s all a symptom. You are not alone and I hope you hang in there!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
sorry one more thing is there will be moments where ur in full anxiety mode then there’s moments where u feel normal or numb but u get upset with ur partner or still don’t feel love. it’s completely normal and apart of the healing process. ur ocd will try to convince u of anything to take away what u love and it wears many different disguises. sorry for another comment i just related to this a lot and wanted to help as much as i can because i know this pain of feeling mentally and physically exausted
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Exactly!! It’s not about suppressing the thoughts either it’s about kind of calling it’s bluff like okay that thought or feeling is there I accept it because it’s a part of my disorder but it means nothing about me or my actual feelings or morals it’s just a symptom. And going from there the more you ignore or disregard the smaller the big anxiety thoughts and feelings get it will feel very uncomfortable at first and some days are harder than other but ultimately those thoughts and feelings will get smaller and smaller. Ocd wants the power and certainty it’s a bully don’t give it to it you can say I’ll live with the uncertainty and stay with him I love him because I say I love him and go from there and eventually it will dissipate even though it never feels like it will. It will.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
You gotta open up and talk to him . Are you seeking therapy??
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Never got therapy…😞 I don’t wNna end my relationship
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@7710 ❤️ The fact that you don’t WANT to end your relationship should tell you something.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I’m so numbed out I can’t feel anything
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Like right now I don’t feel anymore symptoms and I feel too normal… 😞
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Are you together all the time? Do you have hobbies, or a job?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Why when I say I want to it feels different?.. I know I can’t blame everything on ROCD…. But I had 3 clarity moments within this month… why couldn’t it stay… it just feels like my relationship is gonna end anytime now…. Like I feel neutral about the way I am feeling… it’s sad… I know I am gonna cry my eyes out if I did just break up with him… I know I do have other mental issues to deal with… ROCD isn’t the only thing I need to deal with… I have separation anxiety diagnosed by a therapist… I obsess about never doing or being enough.. I obsess over the tiniest sounds my car makes believing that my car will break down soon… I can’t handle stress normally… My partner has always been with me throughout the most stressful times in my life.. I don’t wanna see him leave bc my life wouldn’t be the same if he left… also being just friends wouldn’t be enough for me.. I just want to love him and know it with constantly questioning it over and over again…
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w ago
I don't even know if I should put this here, but I have the greatest girlfriend in the whole world, and I love her very much, but my thoughts keep saying I'm going to hurt her, so I can hurt God and idk what to do, I feel so disgusted and idk what to do, and the worst part is why does some part of me just not even care idk what to do anymore, it's almost like I'm turning into this horrible person and idk what to do, I'm really not sure what to do. I have really been able to be happy I just feel like I don't deserve it and I want to care about people and God and I want to be a good person, but a part of me shuts off my caring nature and idk what to do, I'm really freaking out because it's like IDC and idk what to do I just feel so nasty and scared because why don't I feel like I care. Why does it feel like it's something I wanna do idk, what to do I'm really freaking worried. Also I don't want OCD but a part of me says I need it or I like these thoughts and idk what to do, as im writing this i just feel like laughing and idk what to do, i really judt want jesus to hug me and say everything will be alright, i am such a monster....
- Date posted
- 15w ago
Sometimes I get really upset with my boyfriend and I can’t tell if I’m not having my needs met or if it’s my ROCD questioning things. I can’t express that I’m upset because he rlly doesn’t understand what is going on in my head and most times I bring it up it’s turned into an argument. It is really frustrating does anyone have any tips on deciphering this stuff or dealing with the upset feeling/ bad thoughts (IE: “He’s cheating on me and that’s why he’s not texting.”) (IE: “He’s talking like this because he just doesn’t love me, and he’s not attracted to me. He clearly wants to leave me but doesn’t have the heart to do it yet”)
- Date posted
- 10w ago
When my boyfriend and I are apart, it honestly feels like I've lost all feelings for him. I start questioning everything, wondering if I even love him at all. Then, when we're finally together again, the memory of those earlier doubts creeps in and completely ruins the moment. I get so caught up in overthinking and analyzing my feelings that I can't even enjoy being with him. It's like I'm constantly second-guessing myself. The worst part is, sometimes later, when we're still together, I do feel the love. But then the anxiety kicks in again! I start worrying that I'm just faking it because I had those doubts earlier in the day. It's this endless cycle of questioning, doubting, and overthinking, and it's exhausting. I'm really struggling to stay present when we're together, and it feels like this constant cycle is preventing me from truly connecting with him. We have been together for three years and we love together, and I just started feeling this way about a month ago; it’s been almost every day since. One day, I randomly thought about breaking up with him. Our relationship is healthy, especially compared to my previous toxic one, where I was anxiously attached for two and a half years. My boyfriend is very supportive of me. I have talked to him about my doubts and everything I’m experiencing, and he continues to support, care for, and help me through it all. I am very grateful for that. One aspect of my current relationship that I would like to improve is our communication, but we are both willing to work on it together. I often find that my overthinking leads me to question whether I really want to try to fix things or if I’d rather just continue as we are. This creates a constant push and pull in our relationship. Has anyone else experienced something similar? Any advice on how to break this cycle and just be present in the moment? I'd love to hear from anyone who's been through something like this.
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