ethosmans
- Date posted
- 3y
Is being an incel dangerous
I’ve never had sex you I feel like I can but since I haven’t and I’m 14 I feel I might be dangerous and I could be a threat to women and society. Please help me get around this
cmac1339cmac1339
- Date posted
- 3y
You’re way too young to be worried about this kind of stuff. I can’t reassure you but hang in there and remember that you’re still a kid
clevermindclevermind
- Date posted
- 3y
Oh my goodness I have a son who is 14 and yes this is a very young age. Get your mind in the right place go ask your parents for advice.
redmuse22redmuse22
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Being a virgin isn't the same as being an incel my friend. Incels are angry people (usually men) who feel entitled to sex and are resentful about not having access to it. Its also very normal to not have had sex at 14. There's no rush. Incel is a mindset/ideology/cult and has no relation to having had sex or not (ex. if you had sex tomorrow it wouldn't magically prevent you from being an incel). This sounds like an intrusive thought. If you have an adult in your life that you trust and feel safe with I would highly recommend you talk to them about this. 14 is a weird age to be at and having someone to unpack these concerns with will help.
GermanCowboyGermanCowboy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m going to be real here… I struggle with these same thoughts and I’m older. The only way to get around them is to say “what if I am an incel?” Remember, OCD thrives off black and white thinking like this. You should learn to accept uncertainty and say “maybe I am not (or am) an incel”. Instead of reassuring yourself that you aren’t one, learn to control the things you can improve. A healthy mindset, going to gym, and good personal hygiene go a long way. Also self-awareness is key in not being an incel.
ethosmansethosmans
- Date posted
- 3y
@Josean It’s weird for me because I have been trying to self improve and cut the distractions out like social media so these thoughts feel so real and my whole purpose is to find a good woman and improve myself but I kind of like avoid them because of social anxiety and I feel if I don’t chase them they chase me. I’m lost
GermanCowboyGermanCowboy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@ethosmans Yeah I can relate to that and I’m more than twice your age. My advise is to work on your OCD first, get some exposures. Ask girls out on dates, respectfully of course, and don’t expect anything. If you get a date, great, but if not, that’s good too. At least you are making the effort. Incels don’t do that. Good luck out there, and remember, there’s plenty of more fish in the sea.
GermanCowboyGermanCowboy
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@ethosmans Also, I agree, cut back on social media. It is fueled with triggering material and full of things you don’t need to worry about. Plus it’s not representative of real human interactions.
endlesshoursendlesshours
- Date posted
- 3y
there is a lot more to incels than just not having sex. they have a sense of entitlement to sex and don't like women because of this, and share their views with other incels who will agree with them.
KyleCanGoTheMileKyleCanGoThe...
- Date posted
- 3y
Incel’s hate women, hate society, and want people who are ugly to dominate good looking people and claim their place in the world so women have sex with them… you’re not an incel. And if you ever fall down a rabbit hole of inceldom it’s really common and there’s lots of resources to get out. You’re fine my guy.
KyleCanGoTheMileKyleCanGoThe...
- Date posted
- 3y
Hasan has really good commentary on YouTube about why incel ideology is ridiculous if you want some good reassurance on why you wouldn’t want to be an incel. It helped me
A.SmithA.Smith
- Date posted
- 3y
Listen, it will come. Don't get your head wrapped up in keeping up with peers. I struggled with that in high-school, and it ruined every day for me. You are you. You don't have to meet any social standards. Remember this phrase. " your perception dictates your reality" if you tell yourself you are a lover, how do you think you are going to feel? Like a lover. Life gets better. You are in a very tough time in life. Keep your nose in the books and out of your own head. Learn from me.
A.SmithA.Smith
- Date posted
- 3y
Loser* sorry, autocorrect
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- Date posted
- 18w
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- Date posted
- 15w
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veinsoul
- Date posted
- 14w
stupid thoughts
tw: mention of SA & suicide 18+ I’ve been experiencing different themes & today I was going thru fitness goals for petite women on reddit & seeing their hard work. I thought to myself, “if they can, so can I” & well I have more thought abt me going back to a healthy weight & it made me feel good. it’s like I can’t wait to finally be freed of this obesity. anyway, a couple days ago I went to the store with my baby brother & while shopping, there were two men towards the back of the store. some lady came up to me & asked where condensed milk was at bc she couldn’t find it. I didn’t know either but went looking with her. she told me one of the men in the back was following her, so I stood close to her. eventually she went another way to look for the item. I thought to give it another try and as I was walking thru the aisles, I noticed the two men who had finished talking with an older woman. I don’t make eye contact with anyone at the store, ever. unless I’m greeted by the employees, but that’s it & I do a quick glance. so I’m abt to enter into another aisle and the men pass by & I’m pretty sure I was being verbally harassed bc he was calling me names and cursing. nobody else was nearby. I didn’t even do anything to this guy. inside I wanted to clap back, but remembering the youtube videos I watched of women coming across hostile/insecure men, I realized that it was best to stay quiet. as much as I talked abt deleting myself in the past, I did not wanna put my brother and I at risk and die at the hands of a man lmao. I wanted to make it home alive. now that may seem extreme, but u never know. the reason I mention this is bc while I envisioned myself in my ‘dream body’ (just healthy), I began to have thoughts of, “what if I start to get verbally harassed by men?” I have bought clothes that I found were beautiful and thought it would fit my theme. I’m just worried men will try to SA me and they’ll say something like “she was asking for it” bc of the way I dress. and the types of clothes I have are cute/beautiful tops to go with jeans. literally halter/blouse tops. it’s bad enough for women but I feel like it can be even worse for me as a petite woman. even worse if they think I’m underage & still go for it. unfortunately, I’ve been approached by grown ass men as a minor in the past & each time it felt disgusting. this was when I had a healthy weight too. hopefully in a year or two I can make myself appear older bc I do have a somewhat youthful face. my height doesn’t help either lmao. I hope the clothes I have and some others that I’m planning to get will help me achieve an ‘older’ look. I’m pretty confident I can do it. just need to lose the weight and do some styling. soooo, to conclude, I’m just worried men will try to have their way with me. idk if this is ocd or a true worry of mine. bc it is a genuine issue for women. shit is real.
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