heartbroken

@hnichole916 You’re so right! Everyone has intrusive thoughts/feelings/sensations but those with OCD cannot let them go. Please Roccoxx555, please ask for the help you need now. Don’t wait decades torturing yourself like I have with some of my themes. There are so many more resources now. The longer you wait, the harder it could be to break the cycle and the more distressed you’ll become. Send much support to you!

@hnichole916 Thankyou for this, i just don’t know where to begin on explaining to them? Please tell me how do i go about explaining this?

@Anonymous Thankyou, i wish i got help when it didn’t feel so terribly real, i really don’t want it to be real it just feels this way and i’m scared. I am trying to tell my parents this week, if i gain the courage 👍

@Anna,hi! nah its so gross but it genuinely feels this way😭 I’m sorry i don’t really understand your last sentence? I am feeling very little anxiety weirdly like just pain in my chest and fog in my head, like my anxiety mechanism just broke and this is the problem, i just feel confusion and like i’m acc a monster. When before there was much more doubt, only 2 weeks ago…

@Roccoxx555 - ERP is the treatment used for ocd. ERP is "Exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy is one of the most effective forms of treatment for OCD. Under the guidance of mental health professionals, people who receive ERP therapy can gradually reduce their anxieties and stop the problematic cycle of OCD." Since your anxiety is high right now, the erp can help alot. https://www.mcleanhospital.org/essential/erp#:~:text=Exposure%20and%20response%20prevention%20(ERP,the%20problematic%20cycle%20of%20OCD.

@Roccoxx555 - Also, ocd can make the person feel like their thoughts and feeling are actually true and real. At the end, the intrusive thoughts are not real nor true. Thoughts are just thoughts.

@Anna,hi! Oh right, yeh i’ve read a lot about ERP and tried it out myself and i don’t know i must of done it wrong because it only made me feel worse and made my obsessions feel more real than before

@Anna,hi! Thankyou! I hope this is true for me, i can’t live with this otherwise

@Anna,hi! Exactly, OCD targets your biggest fears and tailors its responses (be they thoughts, feelings, urges and/or sensations) specifically to you. You don’t want that thought? It’ll replay all day! Don’t want a sensation! Well, here you go 24/7 and make it even worse. Think you’ve got it all figured out? Here’s another curveball. You don’t like these thoughts? Oh come on, of course you do! It’s just the game.

@Anonymous Example #1: Ten years ago, my kids contacted lice (gross but it happens) and I got it from them. Everyone was treated and fine but I could not get it out of my head (no pun intended) that I was somehow still infected. Six months of checking, using every treatment out there, constant researching. And my scalp did not stop burning; it felt like it was on fire and crawling! I wouldn’t hug anyone or come to the house because I didn’t want them to get infected because of me. Only when I decided to “drop the rope” did it subside.

@Anonymous it’s very hard to dismiss these feelings, but this makes me feel a bit better, i was wondering if you could tell me, as you are a parent, how i should go about to tell my parents ?

@Anonymous thankyou! ik in a lot of themes things can feel real as i’ve heard from almost all themes that u can end up “convinced” of certain things but it’s just so hard when you’ve never experienced it before and it’s such taboo topics. i only developed this right after i turned 16 and it’s been hell since that moment!

@ROCDmensch Thankyou for your kind words, it makes sense i didnt feel this way at all, what? 2 months ago. maybe my feelings can go back… i pray 🙏 How can i fight through this state? please any advice? i want to fight, i just haven’t heard this really happen to anyone before?

@Anonymous the problem is i was having high anxiety and then 2 weeks it all just went! like i got triggered so badly that i couldn’t deal and my emotions are gone too, i can’t feel disgust at all and all i want is to feel disgust because it’s disgusting! and when i try to feel my emotions i just feel a heavy weight on my chest like i can’t access it, i don’t feel anxiety but my heart races and i have panic attacks. the “real” feelings never lasts this long! i know my values will always be good but it doesn’t matter if i’m a disgusting monster deep down.

@Roccoxx555 Have you been struggling with this all by yourself? No therapist? Perhaps it’s because you had so many extreme emotions for so long that now you’ve now disconnected from them entirely? The best thing you can do is talk to your parents. They love you and will do anything to help you. I’m a parent myself and there is absolutely nothing that would change my love for my kids. You don’t have to tell them everything if you don’t want to but they’ll help you find the help you need.

@Anonymous yes pretty much, i just can’t bare people thinking i’m as horrible as i think myself. so i never really got proper help, my parents got me a cbt/ talk therapist that helps with mood, she understands ocd but doesn’t do erp so she just validates how i feel because i hve so much self hatred, i didn’t end up telling her anything for weeks. i think i have a problem with opening up about this. thankyou for saying that, they love me so much but something in my brain tells me it’s only conditional and i have to be perfect for them, i don’t want them to think i’m broken. i just don’t know where to begin with telling them, i’ve wasted money on the therapy because i haven’t been open earlier.

@Roccoxx555 I’ve struggled with the same issues: thinking my parents’ love was conditional. But I truly believe that any parent who brings a child into this world, loves and protects them, should know it’s their duty to provide unconditional support.

@Anonymous somewhere i know that’s it’s unconditional but i’m worried they will think i really want to do the things the thoights suggest and won’t trust me but i need to be brave and deal with this sooner as it’s only gotten worse and i’ve only gotten more unsure

@Roccoxx555 Maybe they deleted their comment because they don’t like to have much of an online presence. Please don’t take it personally, focus on your own health.

@Roccoxx555 i just threw up i never opened up about pocd or incest ocd and i’m so worried why they would get rid of my comment about it, to anyone who read it, did u think it was bad and not ocd

@Anonymous oh okay i’ll try i’m just confused but okay i’ll ignore

@Roccoxx555 Hey, don't worry, it's just late were I live. I'll get back to it tomorrow :)

@ROCDmensch ah i’m sorry, don’t feel pressured to respond, i just got scared as to why it got reported or something, i’m sorry i’ve just been a panicking mess recently 😅