Long distance relationship
how come my bf is fine with going long periods without me? he has said he doesn’t mind it and why is he so much less unbothered by it than i am
i understand this. tbh i honestly came to the conclusion that i just need to learn how to be ok with enjoying time alone as well. i can relate because my bf can enjoy moments even when he is without me for a bit. i understand tho. its hard because then u start thinking like “damn am i not a missable person?” or things like “does he like being around me?” stuff like that, but i learned that people can love the time with you and without you and it doesn’t take away the joy they get when they do see you. i do understand tho. i have to work on this myself
I am so glad you can relate. I try to be okay with this but then he does this: he has been in Japan for 2 weeks and after he got back I could not see him for awhile and then he finds out his tire has a nail in it. So then I am not able to see him until the car is fixed and he told me he would visit me as soon as it was fixed...but then his brother wanted to use his car out of no where to go on a ski trip with his friends and my bf lets him use it. it made me so furious because he switched the plan on me when i have already been waiting a month to see him but his whole thing is that he will see me in a few days so it will be okay but he does not understand why i am so crushed by his choice and how it makes me feel like he doesnt want me.
Hi! With any “what if” ocd thought we have to sit through the uncomfortable feelings, you can do it :)
I know that this feels really hard, especially in the moments that it happens. I think that everyone is so different in how they react to various situations. Something someone once told me that helped me in a different scenario was that maybe it isn't that one is right and the other isn't- maybe you are both right in your way of handling situations, it doesn't have to be either or. You both come from different histories that shape who you are and how you respond. I think that relationships are about learning about each other and finding ways to compromise and allow each other to feel what they feel. Hope this helps somewhat.
is it normal to feel somewhat disconnected from your partner when you’re away from them and you’re having ROCD thoughts?
Is it normal to not miss your partner? Or should I always want them around? I’m home for a few days seeing my parents and I have anxiety about not missing my boyfriend. I of course compulsed and FaceTimed him to test myself but all I felt was anxiety and OCD over his appearance. I just think I should be attracted to him always, and I’m not. I can’t tell if this is just a normal couples thing, or I’m having bad ROCD. Help!
Hi. I would love an opinion: Me and my bf, have a really similar personalities and intrest. We get along really well. The difference came out from the fact that I have an anxious attachment (= giving priority and attentions to express my love. I would love to spend all my days with him) but he is avoidant! (=super independent, prefers to do things alone, fears being "strict" in a relationship; have a lot of females friends, ready to take my place). I get really hurt by some behaviours of him, but that he do without giving them the same meaning that I see and that hurts me. He want to solve the problems. But all of that make me question myself: would be better finding someone more compatible with me (I mean, someone that gives to attentions and time spent togheter, the same importance that I give? I would prefer it, I don't want to keep being hurt... but I don't want to broke up with him either... what should I do?? Is that still rocd?
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