- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 5y ago
No, he just mentioned it as a joke cause I said I had a yeast infection which was actually caused by horrible amount of stress. He's always joking like that, but I know it is actually his insecurity and huge trust issue he has. He accuses me of cheating a lot, so I know if I have some sort of std he wouldn't believe it was from him and he would leave me even though I never cheated on him, I love him more than anything in the world.
Yes, I understand that, thank you for answering ♡ I love him so much...it's so hard to accept that he can be so mean and so unfair sometimes, but the truth is I never talked about it with him, I will try that definitely. I still have hope he will understand that his behaviour is not okay.
Wait... he has it? Or just mentioned it?
Hmmm, well you really shouldn't allow him to accuse you of cheating on you if it bothers you, that's controlling and emotionally abusive and I'd at least talk to him about it. Maybe I'm misunderstanding his intent though.
It is some sort of emotional abuse unfortunately, but I feel completely powerless cause I just know he wouldn't believe me, no matter how much I try to logically explain it to him. And now I have this new obsession because of his sarcastic "jokes" :( I probably have to disregard it, but as always, the problem is that it feels real.
I had someone trying to do the exact same thing to me of late, multiple times. It's gaslighting. I would suggest that you talk to him about it and ask him to stop, but I doubt he will. You deserve better than to have someone you purportedly love accuse you of things you didn't do.
This is definitely emotional abuse and in most cases that means you need to leave. I don’t see any evidence that your partner recognizes this as a problem or wants to change. If you left them, I think you’d see a dramatic decrease in your OCD symptoms and while the breakup would be sad you’d eventually be soooooo much happier both alone and with someone else someday.
If you haven't communicated it with him clearly, it's only fair to give it a shot. Good luck! But just make sure that this relationship is the right thing for you. This isn't something where you two need to compromise. If he continues accusing you of these things and it makes you uncomfortable, it needs to change. We're here for you ♥
I understand that you love him. And that makes it hard to leave. But you can both love him and recognize that he’s not good for you and unwilling to treat you the way you deserve to be treated. If you wait until you no longer love him to leave, you may never do so. And you’ll spend your entire life in this misery. If you go, and see how amazing life can be without him, you’ll see how bad the situation really was. And you’ll be proud of yourself for respecting your own self worth.
I'm absolutely terrified now of genital herpes. I've slept with one person and I am in a relathionship with him for 10 years and somehow I still am horribly afraid I might have genital herpes. I've been very weak today because of the level of my anxiety and of course I had to be stupid and google it, so I found out it can be asymptomatic, and now I'm paralyzed with fear. Also I feel "itchy" down there...great...just great. I just need to accept I'll never feel peace in this life again.
Really really struggling with an ongoing genital herpes obsession. I have had no serious sign that I have it and I've been tested multiple times for every other STD but herpes requires either a blood test or the swabbing of symptomatic sores and a lot of doctors recommend against it since it is so common, harmless, and just causes mental distress to know. 5 years ago I messed around with another girl (just kissing and maybe hand contact) and she later told me she had genital herpes but she was on medication for it. It's hard to function thinking I have it and may have passed it on even though I have no reason to think I do. I feel like getting blood tested while having no symptoms would be a bad idea for my recovery but I'm not sure.
have been in a committed long distance relationship for 6 years. At the 1.5 year mark when I was 16 and my boyfriend was 17. A girls friend came forward and told me that her friend slept with my boyfriend. At the time he lived with other billet brothers as well in a very small town The girl had no text messages the only thing she knew was what his bedroom looked like and parts of the house.. As well her friend sent me a screen shot of a text the girl sent her saying that she banged my boyfriend don’t tell anyone 3 days after the date she gave me. and 5 days before she told me my boyfriend posted a picture of us and someone put her username on the post and was liked by her friends. I knew they were friends and snap chatted each other. She didn’t apologize and she told me she was cheated on in the past… she made herself look really good. She gave me a specific time frame she said she went to his place at 6:00 pm and left at 8:30. At the time I was petrified of him cheating on me so I constantly obsessed and watched his location. So I remember that night and I had texts that we had at around 7:00. I found pictures that proved he was not home until 8:00 and his billet parents talked to me going through calendars saying that she believed they watched a movie that night which is what my boyfriend told me they did that night. I also talked to someone who had a kid at the same event as my boyfriend and told me the time frame his team was there till. I remembered all the info because I was already petrified. I have talked to my mom ( who was cheated on by my dad and destroyed my family) and she doesn’t believe it. I told 2 of my best friends and they say it didn’t happen. Now even with all this information the OCD won’t let me move on… bottom line is I believe my boyfriend and as well all the information that I have found backs up his story but there’s always the “what if” for about 3 years I was handling it well until covid and I had to isolate for 2 weeks. My OCD tells me that 1. my boyfriends a cheater… 2. that I am a weak person… 3: that my relationship isn’t whole… 4. that I am stupid… 5. that because this girl said this it has to be true… 6. that ur always supposed to believe the girl… it shows me images of them having sex in my head… 7. It tells me what I remember is false… ( which makes me go in loops of reassuring myself and asking others) 8. that his billet parents are lying for him (even though I had a close relationship with them both),… 9. that some how it must have happened 10. i get this pit drop in my stomach, 11. heart palpitations when it got really bad 12. And some times it’s just a feeling that I know it’s there 13. other times it makes me hate my boyfriend 14. when it comes I start to avoid my boyfriend and he notices…, 15. triggers include hockey rinks, when I meet someone that was from close to where he played hockey my OCD says what if they know something you don’t. Seeing teammates that were on that team with him. Hearing the name of the town. I have immense regret on how I handled the situation I go over what I would do differently etc, for ex. I never confronted her when it happened about about what I found because I felt like I didn’t need to and I always regretted not confronting her so my OCD got so bad that I did confront her 4 years later I thought maybe this girl would confess to lying years later now that she is older… just last month I dm’d her and I told her my proof and she pretty much told me what’s her motive ( even though she told me she was in love with him)… that she doesn’t care about my so called proof and that he cheated on me and I decided to stay… She was so bloody mean. Now this is like an extra ammo for OCD because now there is someone a real person saying that my OCD is right. I have talked to my boyfriend and he has talked to other teammates that he plays with now about it because he doesn’t know what to do. I am beyond stuck. I don’t want to leave this relationship because it is so good and I love him so much but I don’t know how much longer I can do this. You guys might be asking why I have stayed if I could leave tomorrow and this could all be gone… it’s because if I leave my OCD wins and it will just move onto something else. I’m just so tired of fighting the battle in my mind I don’t want to do it anymore. I have looked into ERP therapy but I don’t know how it will help me when my OCD is based off of a real life event that I wasn’t there for. Being cheated on is my worst fear in life because of my parents, I believe they are the worst type of people, and that’s why if he did this to me I’m with a horrible person and that’s why it has so much power…
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