Is anyone else here on disability because of their mental illness? I am currently living with my parents and sister but have been offered an amazing 2 bedroom apartment for low-income and disabled individuals. I was on disability for years (2010-2015) then tried my hardest to go back to work, which I did for 4-5 years (2015-2019). I am now trying to reinstate my disability benefits but the social security office here continues to lose or misplace my paperwork and give me incorrect information regarding my case. They say my case is currently being reviewed and I should get more information in the beginning of August. I’m afraid the housing manager won’t be able to wait. :( I’m supremely disappointed and was just wondering if there was anyone out there who has been through a similar situation. I NEED to get out of this house!

stephy

Date posted: 6y

I am in a tough sitch too, trying to get disability under my mother (well, we both are.) App process is so confusing :( We were also looking for similar housing. You can go to a different office as long as it is near enough. Your assigned office doesn't have to be the only one you work with. I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. The housing is really limited, but there is always a chance you can be approved for housing elsewhere!

djsognal

Date posted: 6y

Do what you've gotta do. Can't put a price on your mental health ♥

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

Thanks for replying, djsognal. I think “doing what I have to do” means selling my MacBook Pro, my new pro bike, my underground vinyl collectible toys, and other electronics. I’m super bummed that this is the realization, but I am afraid another suicide attempt will occur if I keep living here. Real talk, huh? Thanks again.

djsognal

Date posted: 6y

Of course. Easier said than done. I live with my grandma. Lived with my parents a year ago. They put a tremendous strain on my mental health. But as soon as I can get a stable job I'm getting out of there because it's worth it. You'll be happier, I'm sure :)

Anonymous

Date posted: 6y

Thanks for replying, augustonyx! My sister is applying for disability right now, too, and is having a hard time. I’ve heard from two people now that several years ago, social security administration approved too many applications and now it’s like a pendulum where they are denying just as many to balance it out. I know a man that lost both his legs to diabetes that was denied disability benefits. How is that fair? Everything government program-related is confusing, in my opinion, but I’ve found applying for and getting disability to be the worst. I applied in 2009 and was approved my first try, which is something I’ve learned doesn’t happen often. I am grateful for that, at least, but it’s like you have to either choose to go back to work forever or stay on disability forever. The process of trying to go back to work is ridiculous. I had my own apartment for 5 years and was under a section 8 voucher for a year. The minute I tried to get a part time job, they took it away and I was forced to get a full time job or go back on disability and live with my parents. They don’t give you enough money to survive on. This is my third time being offered housing and I am going to do everything I can to keep it this time. Thanks for the tip on the different offices! :) I live in a fairly small city where safe, clean, and affordable housing is nearly impossible to come by. This apartment is all of that and then some. And it’s 2 bedrooms when I really only need a studio! I don’t want to live anywhere else in my state right now, but I may have to. I wish you and your mother the best of luck on your applications. Persistence and endurance is the name of the game with social security administration.

stephy

Date posted: 6y

I really wish you and your sister the best in your quest (because it really is a full on quest) to receive your monetary/housing benefits. I had no idea about the SSA approving too many! Crazy. I can't believe a part-time job caused you to lose your benefits! From what I understand, people can earn up to a certain amount per month working, and it sounds like someone in charge screwed up. It's such an unfair balancing act trying to afford housing and have enough left for necessities under disability. Thank you for wishing us luck! I believe at least my mother will be approved.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 23w

just venting a bit, it’s been hard lately

I don’t have much of a support system outside of my bf, so I find myself here a lot. I think I just need to vent, so forgive me if I do this too often. It helps to have a community of people who truly understand. I haven’t felt this debilitated by mental illness in months. There has to be some explanation, maybe it’s hormonal, because I feel like I’ve completely lost myself. The panic hits in waves, sudden and overwhelming, like my head is submerged in lava, burning and suffocating. Then, for a brief moment, I feel almost normal and wonder what all the fear was about. But it never lasts. The chaos always comes back. I even considered going to the ER because I’m not sure I can trust myself anymore. Something has to be wrong, because this isn’t me. My life isn’t perfect, but it’s not unbearable either. Since I withdrew from school, I’ve been so much less stressed that even my cycle, which has been irregular for years, has somehow regulated itself. But even with that, I feel like a failure. I was one semester away from finishing, so close, but OCD hit me harder than it ever has. It felt like drowning, gasping for air, reaching for something solid, only to be dragged under again and again. Now, I feel like that again, but worse. I feel hollow, like something is wrong with me at my core. I don’t just feel sad; I feel broken. I break down into uncontrollable sobs every few hours, and I don’t even know why. I just know that whatever is happening, OCD is taking full advantage of how vulnerable I feel. Is this what MDD feels like? Everyone tells me I have it, and it’s been confirmed by my psych, my pcp, and my therapist, but I still can’t seem to fully see it. I don’t know how to separate what’s OCD from what might be another disorder. I’m sorry to anyone also going through such a hard time, my heart goes out to you 🤍

veinsoul

Date posted: 20w

in need of help

I don’t know what I can do. I guess this is more of a depression thing than OCD but who knows. I have been battling this ongoing war within myself for years now and it’s been affecting my academic performance. situation of mine right now: I haven’t done a lot of work for my classes this month and I feel like I’m going to fail the semester again. I don’t know what it is but I can never seem to begin any work. I know I am capable but why can’t I get myself to start? why has this been going on for so long? I don’t understand. I have a history of good grades back in high school before I turned 17. I don’t even know how to describe it. it’s like I’ve been paralyzed and cannot do any work. but I can somehow do offside tasks like pinterest boards or random youtube videos. if I get rid of those, what do I do? I end up sleeping. because I’m tired. I have a low vitamin D deficiency & have been trying to get energy. I’m at a loss. I also bought unnecessary stuff on sunday when I went out with my family. I bought some things for the kids and I ended up buying myself a dress and a few accessories. now I have to work extra to gain that money back doing uber eats because I need it asap. it’s like I don’t want to work, for now. my coworkers who are around my age don’t work as much & I think to myself, “wow, they must be getting in the work done” meanwhile I’m working 3 days a week (which isn’t much) and attending school. I feel like if I change my schedule again, I’ll ruin it for the rest of my driver coworkers. I’m in a lead position at work so having to put on a mask is quite tiring. there’s so much I want to say that I don’t think it will fit in this post. I have booked a mental health session with a school counselor. all I want at the moment is to have my own place and be in a better mental state to take care of my cats. they mean a lot to me but this stupid ass undiagnosed mental issue is getting in the way. sorry for the long rant. I am tired.

nae nae

Date posted: 19w

Afraid I won't recover

I'm going through a rough time. I used to think medication would brighten my world, but if anything, it's muted it. The physical anxiety is less, and I felt okay(ish) for a while, but things are getting bad again. I'm so afraid I'll never get to a point where I feel safe in my body and in my mind. Today is the first day I've cried in... I don't know how long. But I didn't feel the relief I thought I would. Initially, I did, but it morphed into dread, and now I'm sitting by myself, trying not to panic. I really want to begin seeing a therapist for OCD, but I don't know how much my insurance covers. There's just so much on my mind right now. A whole bunch of old themes are resurfacing. I wish I could've been given a different path in life. I'm trying to stay strong. It's just really difficult. I feel like I'm being sent back to square one :(

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