having string feeling of regret shame and guilt about a past mistake i can't get it out my head it won't go away i feel like why did we do this when we were younger if this hadn't of happened i would be living my life but instead i'm just about getting by i really don't know what i'm meant to do or say to get past this mistake and instead feelings it's been about 10 years now living with this mistake i'm now 24
I know it’s very hard - as I write these words I’m struggling. But we need to keep reminding ourselves that what is in the past is in the past. I know as OCD sufferers we feel the need to know that we are allowed to move on, we also feel the need to be punished for what we have done. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve confessed and when they respond with love I think - did you hear what I said!?! I’ve wanted to hand myself into the police so many times. But this is where we have to learn that we can let go and we can live the life we want to and deserve to
You are not alone I go through the same thing I’m 19 and yet I haven’t been able to live my life cause I live more in the past of my mistakes while my life passes me by. but I did recently start therapy cause I want to break free and start having acceptance of my past/mistakes to live a better life. I do believe that with constant work of oneself this is something that can be overcomed and manageable.
@DGviolets22 i am currently in therapy but not consistent as i'm waiting to have my appointment with a psychiatrist in august then my therapy will continue with work put in place
Your not alone I’m the same mistakes from when I was 15/16 We were children so as adults when we look back we need to remember we are looking back with matured brains We didn’t have that as adolescents
@Jonathan123147 it's hard to think that way i don't know how to do that
I’ve been ruminating on my past and it’s been haunting me a lot as of lately too.. have u reached out to a therapist yet? That’s what I’m currently doing
I feel the exact same at the moment, you are not alone. I ruminate about the events a lot and feel stuck like there’s nothing I can do. Which is true as the event is done now and there’s nothing I can do to change it, often our ocd makes it seem worse than it was too. I was listening to a podcast earlier and heard that the way to deal with shame is to acknowledge it and try to move on with our lives. Most people live with shame and guilt about past events, it’s just the ocd that makes us think that we can somehow solve it by thinking it over and over. We need to learn to live with uncertainty. So what if the event happened? You have survived for 10 years since this event, we don’t have to carry our shame around with us ❤️
@2468ytteb thankyou i wish it was easy to think that way
@NaggingOCD Me too, it will be hard for us but I promise one day you will live happily with this ❤️ Can I ask, have you experienced other OCD subtypes in the past that you are no longer focused on?
I did something a long time ago that I didn't realize was so bad at the time until a long time later, one night I was about to go to sleep and I remembered doing that thing. It was something I did willingly but it didn't cross my mind at the time at all that what i was doing was so wrong and I didn't know it was that bad if that makes sense. I feel so terrible the guilt is eating me up. I don't know what to do. I would never ever make that same choice or mistake again but its really upsetting me... I'm a Christian and I try to pray about it I even talked to my parents about it they told me to let it go but why is it so hard to?
How can I forgive myself for the mistakes I made as a teenager (maybe 15 through 18 or 19 I don’t remember exactly) when at the time I had no bad intentions I just didn’t understand what I was getting into? How can I forgive myself for being so dumb? I should of known. But unfortunately now dealing with real event and other themes trying to find “proof” it’s so exhausting and unsettling especially when the worst case scenario about my self and my past comes up literally every day and I have to fight it with “maybe, maybe not”…when will it ever go away. Do I even deserve for it to go away? No matter who I’ve told whether it was a parent or a therapist they all say the same thing…….let it go……..how am I supposed to do that. I want to do great things in life. I want to make up for all I have done wrong. I want to help people but I can’t even help myself. I hate myself. I don’t even like myself at all. I would go back in a heartbeat. But I can’t. I’m stuck in this mental hell. Will I ever be ok again…….
When I was 12 I made one of the biggest mistake in my entire life. Last night, my brain decided to replay that feeling over and over again to the point of starting to hate myself for it. Now I can't stop thinking that I need to be punished for it, I should never be forgiven and that I am a bad person. My partner should break up with me because I am a bad person and they don't know about it so I don't deserve to be loved at all. I know, however, that I made that mistake a long time ago, that I am a completely different person and that I am a good person now, and that's what matters. But I can't get myself to forgive my past self because if I forgive him, that means I'm a bad person for condoning what I did. Do you have any advice on how to overcome this? Thank you in advance
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