How can i know its ocd like im sure i dont want it but i get this constant doubt that im faking and that I actually like it, i dont get disgust no more and stared reading about the deep down feeling and i feel loke i dont have it even tho i think i do hahahaha its kind of confusing.I know deep down that i want to be straight but my mind is making me feel like its not ocd anymore that i was using it as an excuse
If you enjoyed gay thoughts, than you wouldn’t be posting about how much they bother you. Think about your favourite food. When you eat it or think about going to eat it, you simply enjoy it — that’s it. There’s no, “why am I thinking that I actually like that food? Does it mean that I’m weird for liking this food?”. None of that, you just like the food so you eat it.
I’m reading a book about unwanted intrusive thoughts, and here’s a loose summary of what it said about sexual orientation OCD, “You are different from people who actually want to experiment their sexuality. Those people get curious when they get these thoughts. But when people with SOOCD get these thoughts, they experience terror, or discomfort, etc.”
Last thing I’m gonna say. Posting on this app and asking people to constantly reassure you that you’re not gay will not save you. You’re stuck in limbo right now bro. I’m not fully cured, but I was where you are a few months ago. Eventually you gotta let go and just let the thoughts pass. DO NOT go and do something gay. But when a thought comes you just gotta be like, “Yeah, maybe I do want that, and it means im gay, that’s okay,” or, “Yeah, there’s a possibility that me thinking this does mean im gay, whatever.” Our thoughts can get tormenting. But at the end of the day, no matter what our thoughts are, WE HAVE THE CHOICE, to act on them or not. And even thought our anxiety makes us feel like we’re gonna act on them, we are equally as likely to act on our intrusive thoughts as someone who doesn’t have OCD. If and intrusive thought comes. Just let the thought be there, don’t dwell on it, don’t attempt to push it away, don’t say you don’t want it, don’t ask yourself why you’re thinking it — just let it be there. If you wanna see how easy it is to being to let go of your intrusive thoughts, try this exercise. Set a timer for 2 minutes. And DO NOT think about carrots… Don’t think about the taste, the shape, the smell, bugs bunny, the colour, none of that. Try to not think about carrots. Once you finish the two minutes of NOT THINKING ABOUT CARROTS (you’ll most likely fail, but it’s okay because I’m failing you will see what I’m trying to show you), I want you to apply the same logic to your regular thoughts. Watch how hard it is to not think about something when you tell yourself to not think about it. This may teach you to let go. Hope it goes well.
Sometimes i feel like im using ocd as an excuse. What if i dont really have it and im just freaking myself out? Does anyone feel this way
That’s kinda my question. All my thoughts feel so realistic and so now I doubt if they are ocd and if I just can’t make my mind up about something and I’m using ocd as an excuse or something idc I feel like this post is word vomit.
I’ve had so many moments of clarity with my OCD that I love my boyfriend and I’m beyond willing to go through this to be better and be with him. in the back of mind I’ve in a way known I was at least somewhat sexually attracted to women (I’m a woman) since the start of the ocd it was always like “okay. Fine, but I don’t want to date a girl” I only just realized this after the ocd started, I never really argued with this. my ocd has always revolved around if I’m romantically interested in women and not men. I’ve done so many compulsions through this year and a half and 9 times out of 10 have come to the conclusion that I don’t want to be with a woman romantically. I always end up feeling like I know I love my boyfriend. But the doubts don’t stop about whether I want to spend my life with a woman instead, my heart literally breaks to think of not being with my bf and imagining him with someone else. I don’t want to be with a woman I know deep down somewhere underneath the anxiety that that’s not what I want. It doesn’t feel natural for me, unfulfilling. I want to tell my boyfriend about the possible sexual attraction to women (ik it’s still ocd related) but I’m scared that once I tell him, I’ll realize that I actually do want to be with women and not with him. Ugh I’ve spent hours today ruminating about this after being solid in my commitment with him for a little while, I’m stuck in this loop and idk how to get out right now
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