Questions about OCD

So I’m 17 & I’m curious as to how OCD effects you’re relationships & interests &/or crushes you get on people. This feels a little silly thing since it’s not that big a deal & feels like such a teenager problem, but I thought maybe other people might understand if it’s an OCD things. Whenever I start to take an interest in someone I quickly start to feel obsessed & all I do think about them, it’s been like this pretty much my whole life It; used to bother me & make me feel like I was crazy but now it doesn’t bother me so much. However I’ve started a new job a developed a little crush on one of managers who’s just a couple years older than me; that’s not a big deal but it’s frustrating me how much he’s on my mind the last couple days. I also feel like I’ll get random crushes on people I don’t actually I have interest in but all of a sudden I’ll be obsessed with them & feel like I have a crush on them but pretty much have no interest in actually pursuing anything with them. Are these OCD things? Both the becoming obsessed with crushes as well as feeling like I’m interested in someone even if I don’t & then also becoming obsessed with them? I just wanted to vent a little & get some opinions before I head into work today. I’m still fairly new to OCD, I’ve started to realize it affects a lot of aspects of my life but not sure on everything yet.

Username: jfia16jfia16

Date posted: 1y ago

Look into limerence! It's a term coined by a psychologist I believe. She wrote a book called Love and limerence. I'm still fairly new to the term and concept of limerance, but I found out about it through a breakup thread on Reddit and really identified with it. It's a common theme in OCD. I also think it is related to maladaptive daydreaming. Another new term I've learned that I identify with the experience of. You're not alone. It's unfortunate that a lot of this information is not widely understood or available, but I'm glad that you are here and have found your support network of fellow OCD warriors.

Username: mamasaysmamasays

Date posted: 1y ago

I'm straight but I am learning that I was obsessed in every relationship I was in. Extremely jealous. Constant what ifs. Intrusive thoughts. I found it difficult to do my job because I was constantly thinking of this person. I coped because I was forced to. I have not been in another relationship for several years and have no desire to. I am afraid this will start again if I get involved with someone in the future

Username: xX_XxxX_Xx

Date posted: 1y ago

@mamasays I’ve never been in a any relationship & honestly, it’s bc I don’t put myself out there at all, sometimes it feel’s frustrating but I often think about how I still feel like I have a lot of work to on myself before I’m ready for that, most of it having to do with OCD

Username: Carolina444Carolina444

Date posted: 47w ago

Hey I’m so glad someone shared this, because I struggle so much with this. OCD can create fake feelings for someone which makes it tricky for your brain to realize that it’s not truly you feeling this. I get this for people I genuinely don’t find attractive or just random people in general. And when I stop and try to not think about it, it becomes louder and stronger. I also get Limerence with people I do like. I struggle so much to live normally and focus on things I need to do, but I simply can’t remove the delusions of this person no matter how much I try. Even if this person is not right for me, my OCD keeps me in a constant loophole. It’s so difficult to enjoy life or enjoy simple things like every other 17 year old. Sometimes it paralyzes me to a point that I’m drained and I still have to carry on with my daily routine and tasks. I’ve never shared this with anyone. Not even my therapist of 2 years, because I’m so embarrassed that she’ll think that it’s just a dumb teenage thing

Username: xX_XxxX_Xx

Date posted: 44w ago

@Carolina444 I relate to everything in this so much, to a T. It’s very very difficult to deal with but at the very least it’s comforting to know that I’m not alone & this is normal for so many people because lots of times I don’t feel normal

Username: Carolina444Carolina444

Date posted: 44w ago

@xX_Xx I know that feeling. You def not alone, and it may happen more than you think. Since it is so internal and personal people don’t normally share so we never get to know :)

Username: wildflower

Date posted: 5y ago

Should I date someone even though I have OCD? Should I allow myself to like someone? I have a huge crush on someone right now and I don’t know if I have normal crush symptoms or if I’m obsessed with them. Should I even pursue a relationship with someone especially in my mental state? I used to want to stay a celibate for life but now I want a relationship.

Username: Sake

Date posted: 4y ago

How to tell the difference between normal relationship doubts and ROCD? Im going on a rant now: I have avoided relationships for the most part over the last 10 years. as soon as I get past the 2nd or 3rd date I feel like if I dont know that they have the potential to be “the one” then I worry constantly about wasting my life and theirs. I had 2 relationships that lasted about 3 months but the whole time, I just wanted to get out even though they were both good guys. In November, I had my first panic attack and soon discovered what I was dealing with (and still managing it) is SO-OCD. Then I learned of ROCD and wondered if that is something I have struggled with since my teens. As soon as I get into a relationship I have these strong urges to break it off for minor stupid things. Things that honestly make no sense. Like a weird freckle or chin (real examples). Not to mention I am afraid of getting intimate because Im super paranoid of getting pregnant... I started talking to a guy during quarantine and it’s slowly turning into more than friends. I really like him and enjoy spending time with him but I am constantly worried. Being aware of ROCD has helped me be mindful of the present but all my old habits are trying to come back full force and I find myself trying to avoid him. Ive read as much as I can find on ROCD and I can check off almost all the obessions and compulsions that are associated with ROCD. But it doesnt affect me the same way SO-OCD did. Like I felt like I couldnt breathe, and I could barely be in public. I wanted to escape so bad all the time. With this ROCD (if thats what it really is) I dont feel that panic, I just feel worried, stuck, and distracted. Not to mention, if I can manage to stay mindful, how on earth do you even tell someone you just started seeing that you have ocd, let alone so-ocd and rocd. It just adds to me wanting to avoid him. Also, how do you go from being dateless and single for 2 years to starting a relationship in the middle of a quarantine while you’re learning that you have OCD.

Username: Youcanheal

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y ago

Relationship OCD

Has anyone ever had an intrusive thought that they have a crush on someone else while they’re in a relationship? I had an intrusive thought about one of my co-workers who is female. I don’t believe I am even gay but for a moment I had a small panic attack that I had a crush on her. I know I love my boyfriend and want to be with him but now I feel like I betrayed him by thinking about someone else like that even though it was an accident. I know I can’t say anything to him about it because I’m pretty sure the crush isn’t real and it would just make things weird between him and I. Anyone have any suggestions or can relate to this?

Relationship OCD

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