In need of queer advice!

This is ridiculous, now I feel like I’m truly questioning my sexuality. I’m 15. Never had a crush on a girl, don’t think I have. Touched myself to lesbian porn mostly, turned on by sexual images of women but still I never questioned what I felt for boys. I knew I would crush on them, I knew they were feelings. If anything maybe I could be bisexual. But still that doesn’t seem right. I’m just completely lost. Maybe I’m just thinking to much. It shouldn’t be this hard right? I read bisexual people immediately knew. Most of them I think, they realized all their crushes and Fantasies they wanted in real life. I never fantasized about a women, or any girl. I remember crushing on a senior once, I felt excited to see him at school. And fantasized about him. And with my Boyfriend he was just so innocent, and cute and sweet, and when we do sexual stuff I like it. I get uhm .. wet. Sorryyy. I recently got advice to look out for any girl crushes. And I’m really scared about that now. Maybe I can crush on a girl and maybe I can’t. I don’t know anymore. I feel completely unsure of everything. Im not sure if I’m straight or not. I recently started to take quizzes again. I either got straight or bisexual. And idk can anyone give advice? Thanks for reading through all of this if you did.

Am I lesbian or it’s just hocd and libido issues? I (F29) don’t feel desire to have sex with my boyfriend (M32) and I am scared it’s because I am lesbian. We are together 3 years and we are also living together. I think I am more aroused by lesbian porn and lesbian fantasies than straight stuff and sex with men. I always dated men and I felt drawn to them, I also never wanted to be with a woman in real life and I was never attracted to a woman in real life, but I am scared I am just in denial and didn’t know about it or I always knew but didn’t want to accept the truth :-(. It’s not that I never wanted to have sex with men, but when the relationship starts to be serious the desire decreases. I really don’t know what to do. I love my boyfriend and don’t want to break up with him. It’s not a new topic for me. I deal with it already 4 years. I was diagnosed with anxiety disorder 5 years ago, because I had panic attacks and some health ocd. After one year I started to be scared that I am a lesbian. I had a therapy and I talked about it with my therapists and they said it’s ocd, but I didn’t tell them the whole true about the porn and fantasies. In my country (Poland/Germany) the therapists are mainly familiar with health or harm ocd, so I don’t know if my therapists were familiar with these kind of thoughts. Also sometimes I think that even if it’s ocd it doesn’t mean it’s not truth. The only difference is that I am just more worried, scared and obsessed about it than other people who are questioning their sexuality. Also I even don’t know if it’s still ocd. It feels more like denial right now. Like I know the truth, but I just don’t want to accept it or I try to convince myself that for example it’s normal in long term relationship to not desire sex but the truth is it’s not normal if it happens all the time. I don’t really have ocd symptoms right now. At the beginning I was very scared and had to google all the time etc., but right now I just have pretty normal life. I am just still worried about it and ruminate though right now I try to avoid the whole thoughts and feelings all the time. And this is exactly what the people call denial. Knowing the truth but avoiding it… I don’t know if i have still doubts. It’s more like I know deep down what is the truth but I still hope it’s not the truth and try to convince myself that it’s everything ok but it doesn’t work because I am just a lesbian :-( TL;DR - I have sex issues in my relationship. I don’t feel desire to have sex and I am looking for a solution how to change it. Hopefully it’s because ocd and I am not attracted to women.

This post will be for people 18+ and it is a topic on sexual attraction, if you are comfortable you can read but it’s completely up to you. I know I’m not the only woman that watches lesbian love for pleasure as we are all humans and our hormones go up. I’ve been watching lesbian love for years now (about 3 years) and in most of that time, not once did I question my sexuality until someone asked me a question that triggered my overthinking. Today after watching that, I was asking myself questions like what it would feel like to do this with a woman? How would it feel like to be with one? And because these thoughts came to my mind I freaked out because I keep thinking that I like females but never in my life and even till this day have I ever fallen in love with a women or even thought about marrying a women one day. I always want to have a husband one day and at least have a kid or two. But lately all this questioning has me confused to the point where I question if I’m bi or lesbian and if I even have SOOCD or if it’s generally just me tryna figure out my sexuality or if I’m just in denial. I am also talking to a man romantically and whenever I’m around him I feel happy and I’m always excited to talk to him and he also makes my heart flutter and my body burn for him. But because of these recent thoughts I’ve been having, it just confuses me and adds some stress. Any tips for how I can go about this?