- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
Literally. 100%. Same. I think the best thing to do is talk to your therapist and psychiatrist IMMEDIATELY about this, I think this is one of the worst OCD themes and it really makes everything harder because like, why try to get better if nothing matters in the end? I've been dealing with intrusive thoughts about this by just thinking "who knows whatll happen? not me!" and just letting myself sit in the anxiety every time it flares up. This one is definitely gonna change you more than the other themes. Embrace that change, embrace fear, and just remember that we have to enjoy the time we have
- Date posted
- 5y
I know everyone thinks their particular theme is “the worst” and really, they’re all awful, but the existential/religious beliefs ocd has been the worst for me and the most difficult to deal with. I’m trying to do CBT/ERP for it, but it hasn’t helped very much. It seems so difficult because, while I can resist the compulsion to wash my hands and eventually my brain will learn that I don’t get sick, I can’t die a little bit so that I stop being afraid of dying. I’m not sure how to deal with this. The ache feels so, so heavy—so acute. But what helps me is that no one knows the answers, and that in my uncertainty, I am joining many other great minds who have come before me. We are small, but that doesn’t change what it feels like to hear the birds singing outside, or to eat pizza, or to laugh with those you love. My hope is that learning to treasure those things can help with the despair.
- Date posted
- 5y
I think with the fear of death, that's natural, but its how the brain dwells on it like it's solvable or that its "good" or "bad." With ERP, have you watched any videos about death and dying and all that? That was my first exposure because I'm a glutton for punishment and it did help quite a bit. If you want a recommendation, Ask a Mortician on Youtube was a good source for me. I'm not glad this is something so many experience, but I am glad some of us can open up about it.
- Date posted
- 5y
I’ve tried documentaries about the universe and time and stuff like that and it rlly helped. I watch a lot of murder docs too just because i love forensic science and they seem to keep me off of the topic for the most part. But i’ll try something like that!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
My last and almost life long theme/sub-theme largely subsided recently and my ocd felt like it wasn’t even an issue. Then I went on winter break from uni and being alone made my mind come up with a whole new topic to obsess over. TLDR on my fears, my advisor wouldn’t email me back for a while about signing up for classes so my mind started to worry “what if he doesn’t in time and you can’t enroll this semester and you lose this whole life you just built and all these new friends” So when that issue was resolved my mind found other scarier ways I could be uprooted from my current life and friends that I’ve grown so attached to. Then my mind remembered back when I was struggling with false memories and scrupulosity and I essentially made a post on a forum 2 and a half years ago saying I did something or was convinced I did something that I never actually did. Now I’ve been spiraling about someone finding it reporting me and I either get seen as a horrible person or arrested or something over something I never actually did but “admitted” to out of fear of going to hell. My mind won’t let it go and keeps finding new reasons for it to be “valid” “logical” or even inevitable. I feel like it’s just hanging over my head and I can never rest easy. Especially when I try to focus on my daily tasks or plan for the future I get this horrible flair up of “why plan for the future when this could come back in that future and you get uprooted from all of it” my mind won’t rest without certainty being uprooted won’t happen but certainty doesn’t exist, at least not with ocd. This sucks and I miss being care free.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 19w
Hi guys! I’m new to the community and I’ve recently received my OCD diagnosis (tho I’ve known about it since childhood). I’ve been somewhat spiraling lately as I wait for my first ERP session (hooray!) I was just wondering if any of you guys have received ERP for existential OCD and if it was successful? My existential OCD compulsions are more so mental and have been affecting me in the sense of dream/memory flashbacks and giving me a sort of “uncanny” feeling about everything around me. Any advice is appreciated! Thank you❤️
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 15w
I used to get caught in a loop with existential thoughts very frequently. Every question made my stomach drop: (TW: existential questions) … … ... "Why does anything exist at all? What will death be like? Is anything even real? Is there any meaning to this? Is the universe infinitely big, and if not, what's beyond it? Are there multiverses? Has the universe been around forever? Will the universe end for good, or will it keep going forever? What is forever like? What even IS reality?" It would get so overwhelming that I remember lying on the floor in a fetal position for hours because I felt like there was no escape. I spent most of my days reading articles and watching videos about theoretical astrophysics and philosophy in a desperate attempt to "figure it all out." Of course that only made me more anxious, raised more questions, and kept me trapped in the cycle. Things started to improve once I learned to turn TOWARD reality, rather than away from it, and ERP really helped me do that. I learned that these questions weren't the problem. I learned that I can actually handle the anxiety that arises when exposed to these ideas and concepts. I don't have to figure anything out to make the anxiety go away; it arises and passes away on its own. Ironically, bringing myself into the present moment and becoming more aware of reality helped me escape the cycle of existential dread. Because of that, this topic no longer takes over my life. If I'm triggered by something I see, hear, or think, I may still feel a little twang of anxiety, but then it just goes away. "Maybe, maybe not" has been the single most useful phrase of my life. Do you ever get trapped in a cycle of existential questions? Are you worried that the ERP approach would be too scary to handle? If so, I'm happy to give my advice.
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