ROCD

How do you know if its rocd or not? Or if you’re just finding excuses for being a terrible person

Anonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

ur not a terrible person because you wouldn't feel guilty but to be honest you have to accept the uncertainty behind you being a bad person or having the thoughts that a bad person would have and accept the guilt to reinforce that you are a good person but the thoughts are just a product of your need for everything to be 100% one way or the other. which in reality it will never be that way u'll always have thoughts that contradict what you want to feel but if you accept them as passing thoughts and understand that the majority of your feelings gravitate towards a positive reality then u'll slowly become desensitized to your intrusive thoughts

Anonymous123...

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous Thanks for this ❤️. Ive been trying to find someone who has gone through my exact issue to confirm if this is an rocd thought. I feel like crying… i just feel bad. Half of me is trying to justify the thought which is bad… and makes me feel like im looking for excuses and the other half is trying to make sure its rocd related.. i dont wanna reassurance seek… but i dont want to be this bad person hes in a relationship with. I genuinely hate my brain… my ocd has been kicking my ass lately whenever i get in relationships that cause me to have high emotions.. its like my brain doesn’t want me to be happy.

Anonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

@Anonymous123456789# for me i have rlly intrusive thoughts and crushes and feelings and i wish it were all thoughts in my brain but it feels like theyre interconnected which convinces me its a crush and then i feel guilty and like a horrible person bcs i dont wanna feela ttracted to anyone else and im sure u can imagine the cycle considering u suffer from rocd as well. i dont know if its abt crushes for u or if its abt the compatibility or the fate of ur relationship or intrusive thoughts/icks abt ur partner but either way its all normal and to be honest ur brain wants u to be happy but ur disorder does not. it targets ur biggest fears and reflects them as a reality so until u desensitive urself it will keep perpetuating.

OCDeeznutzzz

Date posted: 1y ago

While seeking reassurance usually isn’t helpful as someone who has accepted the disertenty to a certain extent, I have to say just telling myself okay so MAYBE I could be a bad person but clearly I am self aware enough to get better so at the very least there are ways to solve that problem :) either way the result ends with you not being a bad person, just a human

Anonymous123...

Date posted: 1y ago

@OCDeeznutzzz This made me wanna cry some more when i read it… i agree with what u said. Its just the confessing that fucks me up… in the chance of that possibility being true

[Deleted]

Date posted: 1y ago

Deleted reply.

Anonymous123...

Date posted: 1y ago

@Bigotina Relationship ocd

Anonymous

Date posted: 1y ago

@Bigotina rocd is literally anything u dont want to feel or think while in a relationship. it could be about ruminating the end of ur relationship or anticipating it out of fear. or it could be convincing urself u dont love ur partner. it could be literally anything u see as a fear in ur relationship and something ur scared u cant control that ur ocd targets. it could be abt finding others attractive or not feeling anything or constantly second guessing ur partners intentions, speculation of cheating/unfaithfulness, etc.

Anonymous123...

Date posted: 44w ago

@Anonymous Tw for those struggling with rocd.. Hi your post really helped in my time of need then and i was hoping you could maybe help me now. My ocd is attaching on to whether or not i find my partner attractive. Its hard.. i cant tell if its ocd or not. I struggle with finding myself good looking and body dysmorphia and now its latched on to him.. first it was the guilt of finding others attractive now its this. My partner also struggles with his feelings on how he looks… so i feel like this is doing more damage than anything if i went into specifics about it with him. Our relationship has been going through a really rough patch and hes trying to move states for me to really give us a go… but i feel guilty. My brain keeps telling me that its not right cause of this thought. When i say my morales dont want to fixate on someones looks and rather on how that person treats me i… still cant get past it. And hes putting his livelihood on the line. Any insight plz would be great

Anonymous

Date posted: 44w ago

@Anonymous123456789# this is allllll normal. i think its hard to define each and every thought as intrusive or ocd because they're all accustomed to what WE don't want to feel and they're situational so not everyone can relate to the same thoughts or feelings. but it is the same root cause. u have ocd, u don't want to feel or think it and ocd makes u have feelings and thoughts u don't want. u just need to keep living ur life with it so that ur desensitized to it bcs then jt will stop bothering u and become less frequent. most importantly, choose love when u can't feel it in you because u don't want to feel negatively so just don't act on them. u need to be okay with the uncertainty of ur feelings and the fluctuations of them so that you can move past this discomfort and fear that attracts ocd thoughts. again all normal and valid but teach urself how to detach from the thoughts

Anonymous123...

Date posted: 44w ago

@Anonymous Just wanted to come on here and say thank you so much. Your words helped me work through another rough patch. I appreciate it and am wishing you all the best in your own battles with ocd. Thanks again

Mariabae

Date posted: 16w ago

My thoughts, feelings and compulsions

1. Thoughts about Not Loving My Boyfriend: • “What if I don’t love him?” • “I feel like I’ve lost my feelings for him.” • “I don’t feel love the way I used to.” 2. Fear of Changing or Being Different: • “What if I’ve changed and this is the real me now?” • “What if I’ve grown out of the relationship?” 3. Doubt About Attraction: • “I’m not attracted to him anymore.” • “I feel numb when I look at him.” 4. Thoughts of Disconnection and Irritation: • “I feel irritated when he shows affection.” • “I feel bored or disconnected when we talk.” • “Why do I feel like I can’t stand him sometimes?” 5. Fear of Denial: • “What if I’m in denial and I’m just pretending to love him?” • “What if all these thoughts are true?” 6. Fear of Being a Bad Person: • “I’m a terrible person for feeling this way.” • “I’m ruining my relationship and hurting him.” 7. General Anxiety About the Future: • “What if I’ll fall for someone else in the future?” • “What if I’ll never feel love again?” 8. Intrusive Thoughts from the Past: • “I had violent thoughts about my dad.” • “I worried I was a pedophile after seeing a video.” Feelings Associated with These Thoughts: 1. Numbness and Emotional Disconnection: • Feeling emotionally flat or unable to access love or joy. 2. Guilt and Shame: • Feeling like a bad person or partner. 3. Hopelessness and Despair: • Feeling like things will never get better. • Believing i am stuck this way forever. 4. Irritation and Frustration: • Getting annoyed when my boyfriend shows affection. 5. Fear and Panic: • Experiencing overwhelming anxiety when questioning my feelings. 6. Sadness and Confusion: • Crying frequently, feeling lost, or not understanding why i feel this way. Compulsions I Engage In: 1. Reassurance Seeking: • Constantly asking others if everything is okay or if your feelings are normal. 2. Researching and Googling: • Searching for answers about ROCD, anxiety, and relationships online. • Checking forums like the NOCD app for reassurance. 3. Mental Checking and Analysis: • Constantly checking if i feel love, attraction, or connection. • Analyzing every interaction and emotion to see if they’re “right.” 4. Confessing: • Telling your boyfriend or others about your thoughts to relieve guilt or doubt. 5. Avoidance: • Pulling back from conversations or interactions with my boyfriend due to anxiety. 6. Comparing: • Comparing your current feelings to how you used to feel at the beginning of the relationship. 7. Self-Criticism: • Judging yourself harshly and believing i am a terrible person. FEELING SO REAL I’m struggling with ROCD and it’s consuming me. My intrusive thoughts make me feel like I don’t love my boyfriend, that I’ve changed, or that I’m a terrible person. These thoughts make me feel numb, disconnected, and hopeless. My compulsions include constant reassurance-seeking, analyzing my feelings, researching online, and confessing my fears. It’s exhausting, and I’m desperate to feel like myself again. Does anyone relate to this? How do you cope?

Jennaffuur

Date posted: 7w ago

Rocd

Does Rocd make it nearly impossible to forgive your partner for anything. Whether it is big or small? My situation is so gray area where there’s something my bf did that I feel like I’m not okay with but he did this when we were first dating (not bf and gf yet). I ruminate all day about it bc I don’t want to lose him and see a future with him and I know he loves me so purely. But I also feel like I’m going against my morals here bc I do feel betrayed by what he did. I try to forgive him by diminishing my feelings and telling myself “he never did anything physical with a girl or went out with another girl while we were together” but still feel so hurt that he even messaged another girl while us dating. He’s given me an explanation and has proved how much I can trust him so I’m just completely stuck on whether I should forgive something I know I would’ve never done to him or leave him even though the only thing he’s done wrong was before us becoming official. I’ve broken up with him countless times over this situation bc I feel like I “can’t live with it” but then immediately when we break up I want him back and I kind of understand his explanation and reasoning. I don’t know what is ocd and what is my real intuition anymore. I genuinely think it’s both. Are any of you guys in the same boat?

Anonymous

Date posted: 6w ago

Can someone help

My rocd is spiraling so bad i feel like I’m terrible and can’t recover 😓 idk wuts real anymore yet ik i never wanna leave my man😓whats wrong w me

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