- Date posted
- 1y
Replaying
How do I stop replaying things that happened in my head? (Ex: someone flipped me off today driving and I can’t get past it & can’t stop replaying it in my head trying to remember every detail).
How do I stop replaying things that happened in my head? (Ex: someone flipped me off today driving and I can’t get past it & can’t stop replaying it in my head trying to remember every detail).
For me the only way to stop ruminating (with varying success) is to decide with conviction that even if there is more information to be gathered/ understood about a moment, I am deciding that moving forward without paying attention to it is more important. For instance, thinking about how someone interpreted what I said used to burden me so much it became hard to function and I just withdrew from speaking as much as I could to avoid being misunderstood. I don’t know if this is a common saying but I had to force myself to comply with the ideal that “everything works out in the wash” in the end.
@Lost- Thank you! That’s a good way to think about it.
Ohhhh, that’s OCD. I get stuck on a thought like that. I can’t let it go. Interesting. I think part of letting things go is having compassion for ourselves. Because I was just feeling annoyed that I have another thing to figure out, annoyed that I have these thought patterns in the first place. I listened to a podcast today (11 Things I Tell My Patients in Their First Session of OCD Treatment Ер. 378 — Your Anxiety Toolkit) and she said, “There’s no such thing as bad thoughts.” I think it would be helpful to not judge ourselves so harshly. Why are you (why am I) replaying those bad moments? What are we trying to figure out? It seems like learning to sit with the discomfort and not ruminating is key. Not exactly sure how to do that… But I really did appreciate this post because I definitely do that too and didn’t realize it was an OCD thing. More insight…thank you. I have read things that say we can just choose to not ruminate but that’s proven hard for me. I can distract myself, but it just comes back. I’m missing something… if you figure it out, let me know.
@JediMJ Much easier said than done - been trying to work past this for a long time now with all different kinds of thoughts. Always ones that left me feeling upset in some way. Best of luck to you, I hope you figure out how to get past these ruminations!
@Annonn Yeah…it seems like we get upset by being flipped off or whatever…and instead of allowing ourselves to feel our feelings we jump into rumination. We analyze it to try to make sure it never happens again because this feeling is intolerable. And what I think I’m learning is we have to learn to live with discomfort. And eventually we’ll level out.
I think it’s also if you have the choice to be present in the moment or think about the thing, you choose to be present in the moment instead. For example, I could watch Jimmy Fallon or ruminate on something my friend said to me. I choose Jimmy Fallon, even though my compulsion is to ruminate.
@HopeM365 Good tip! Thanks!
the most debilitating ocd flare-up i’ve been having for the past few months has been about the guy i used to talk to. we weren’t dating per-se, but whatever was going on between us was very confusing and unclear, and it ended up with me being very hurt. he was basically leading me on, and couldn’t commit to me. it’s been months since we’ve stopped talking and i still can’t stop thinking about him. i don’t even care about him that much in an objective sense, but i am genuinely obsessed with him. everything i see reminds me of him, and my mind is constantly running through thoughts about him and our situation — why did it go the way it did, what did i do wrong, does he still think about me, etc. it’s honestly so humiliating and makes me feel pathetic because i know he’s probably moved on by now, and i still can’t handle the thought or sight of him. i just wish i could stop ruminating, because it’s gotten so bad that i can’t focus on school or anything else in life. it’s so constant to the point where, when i bring it up to my friends (which is very often), i’m met with concern and even frustration rather than sympathy. how can i cope with the rumination? it’s genuinely exhausting, and i can’t sleep at night because my brain is just running like a motor. i have dreams about it almost nightly as well. anything helps!
I'm new and I'm really trying to control thoughts of replaying interactions I've had or things I think might happen with the people around me. This is something constant, and it causes me to repeat actions. Then I lose track of time and often end up being late. It has always affected my sleep and becomes a part of my dreams, which are also always vivid. It's always been hard for me to get up. I just constantly keep replaying different outcomes of things that it haven't happened yet going over every possible outcome with no correct answer. I'm scared of what I might say and do when at work because it's been getting worse lately. I've been terrified of socializing, because I feel like I'm going to lose it every time I speak to someone. I work directly with people doing their hair. I don't want my clients or co-workers to catch me in the act of one of my rituals or it to effect the job that I'm doing. It just makes me angry that I haven't been able to control these thoughts and it makes the rituals worse. Then I feel embarrassed after I finally stop repeating whatever it is, I'm doing. I feel like I can't trust anyone, and I’m terrified but I know it's not real. I can't afford to lose it/show it.
I've been having a really tough time lately with a recent workplace interaction that occurrd today, and my mind just keeps replaying the events over and over. It feels like an endless loop, and I'm finding it incredibly hard to let go. I'm trying to figure out if this intense replaying is more about my OCD, or if it's a typical reaction to a stressful situation that's being amplified by my OCD tendencies. The specific details of the incident involve a colleague engaging in a racially insensitive discussion that I tried to disengage from. Despite my attempts to steer the conversation away and remove myself, the situation escalated with direct confrontation and accusations. This led to significant emotional distress for me. Later in the day, the same colleague misunderstood another conversation, making baseless accusations and publicly confronting me in a very aggressive way. I kept quiet throughout, just a bit of muttering. The emotional toll of these interactions has been immense. Now, my mind is stuck. I can't seem to stop dwelling on every word, every gesture, and every imagined alternative outcome. Hoping I'm not viewed as the "angry black woman" which is such an affair narrative why can't I state grievances of racism, without this narrative. * how do you manage the relentless replaying of stressful workplace interactions? What are your go-to coping mechanisms when your mind gets "stuck" on these loops? * Have you found any specific strategies helpful for navigating interpersonal conflicts at work when your OCD makes it difficult to process and move past them? * When you're feeling emotionally vulnerable due to work stress, what helps you prevent these situations from turning into prolonged rumination cycles? Any advice or shared experiences would be incredibly helpful. I'll be so grateful for any assistance. I just feel like I'm not good at life.
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