Just had a horrible attack :'(

It's the middle of the night and I just had a really intense and scary attack of ocd. Not really sure what it was all about, but it was a whole flood of different themes all at once. Only thing that was clear to me is that I was full of such intense fear of myself. Afraid of losing control of my mind and ending up in a psych ward tonight, afraid of thinking of hurting myself and how it might feel good/relieving, afraid of losing control and hurting my pet, afraid of having a full blown panic attack and needing my parents, afraid of losing control and screaming, afraid of giving into the urge to lash out and throw things/throw myself around (lately I've been feeling the need to exert/stim), and afraid of how each and every one of these outcomes would affect others. I'm falling asleep now but I'm still terrified of what just happened. I've never felt anything like it before. I've now been having problems every single day for a month straight (happy anniversary lol). My therapist of four years is not an OCD therapist and I won't be seeing her for two weeks yet. I also just started seeing a psych but I won't be seeing her for over a month yet. I'm wondering if i should get in touch with a NOCD therapist asap because I swear I just keep getting worse and I'm getting more and more paranoid and terrified by the hour. I feel like my behavior has definitely changed. The problem is though I know i'm obsessed with getting help for myself because i'm THAT scared of my own mind. I think having a SECOND therapist would be a bit overkill but i'm also extremely desperate and have been considering this for about a month now. Has anyone else tried a NOCD therapist paired with their normal therapist? Anyways now i'm so scared of what i'm gonna wake up to. These intense mood swings are getting scarier and scarier.

Username: Hopeful29Hopeful29

Date posted: 33w ago

No a second therapist is not a overkill i think if you need it is fine, You are not alone

Username: HopeM365HopeM365

Date posted: 33w ago

Getting a 2nd therapist might complicate things if you’re using insurance, depending on what you have. I’d recommend other supports like OCD support groups, AI Therapy, or warm lines that you can call. I do a mixture of these to help me when I’m not in therapy. I just broke up with my therapist of 2 years because she’s not trained in treating OCD and I just recently got diagnosed. It’s worth getting the right treatment!

Username: secretlyobsessed2012secretlyobse...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 33w ago

I’ve thought about the idea of getting a second therapist too. Know you’re not alone. I’ve suffered through the same thing. One minute I can just be enjoying the weather and the next I’m panicking cause I’m scared I’m gonna kms. NOCD is a great option. And if your current therapist now isn’t understanding your ocd I know from experience how awful that can be.

Username: Neko_Mancer

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 42w ago

I need help I feel like I’m gonna lose control

I’m so scared I don’t even know if this is OCD at this point. I keep having horrible intrusive thoughts on acting upon my worst fear and the feelings and thoughts are so strong and intense I’m genuinely convinced I might lose control and do something horrible. It feels to real and it’s so constant that I don’t trust myself at all. There are times where it even feels relieving to think about doing something horrible even though it’s the opposite of what I want so feeling like that is so confusing and it’s convincing me I’ve become my worst fear. I’ve been trying everything to avoid anything that brings these thoughts and feelings up because I’m just so scared I’m going to snap and do something horrible. I have therapy soon and I’m really glad about that but I’m scared to tell this to my therapist because I don’t know what’s going to happen. I just need to know I’m not the only one who experiences this because I feel like I’ve just gone crazy at this point. I’m so scared that this isn’t OCD.

Username: Wanderer_

Date posted: 39w ago

I suffer harm ocd mostly, but it's been switching

Is it normal my ocd's been switching so aggressively last week Like almost every day it switches I accept a thought and learn to cope with it and a new more horrific one appears I for the first time in twelve years decided to go see a psychiatrist to treat my ocd since it first manifested Do you think this is normal?? It was usually pretty moderate, only switching around 2 themes and wasn't so aggressive since I managed to keep it quiet ir ignored it for almost all my life But it feels like just as I decided to treat it it got a lot worse Also intrusive thoughts feel much more repulsive now, like they are now more scary to me and they're triggered by almost anything This is hell

Harm OCD

Username: Anonymous243

Date posted: 38w ago

Getting worried

These past couple days, Ive had 2 huge panic attacks in a row. I’m getting worried because they were kind of the worst theyve ever been. I couldn’t function at all and if my partner weren’t with me, I’m afraid I wouldnt have been able to move or get up. I was convulsing and couldnt stop having the worst intrusive thoughts. I was so disappointed in myself that I started having super intense suicidal thoughts and couldn’t speak. I really hate ocd. I ruined some of the most fun days that were planned out in a trip too. Idk what to do anymore

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Just had a horrible attack :'(

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