Self-Harm?

So I made some REAL terrible past mistakes, but due to OCD I ruminated about them last night and cut myself for the first time ever (I’m 20) I didn’t do it in a dangerous place like my wrist or anything and I used a razor/it was not that deep hardly any bleeding etc. But I don’t trust myself to not turn to this again in the future, cause I liked it. (I struggle with False Memories, Intrusive-Thought-Action-Fusion, Magical Thinking etc.) Advice for embarrassment/distress?

Username: ConfusedTeenConfusedTeen

Date posted: 33w ago

I’m so sorry that you’re going through that, self-harm is something I struggle with myself and it is hard to get out of. I think the best thing that helps me during times of rumination and digging myself into a deep hole is honesty just taking a breath and reminding myself, I am not that person anymore. You may have made past mistakes, and that’s okay, we were young and everybody makes mistakes. It is important to tell yourself, no matter how hard it is, that you’re working on it, and that you’re not who you once was. I struggle a lot with trying to move on from the past and it’s a goddamn hard thing to do but you got this and you’ve got a whole support team here for whenever you may need it 🩶

Username: Don’tLoveDrama-itLovesMeDon’tLoveDra...

Date posted: 33w ago

@Bone s I really needed to hear so fucking bad🫶💔 Thanks for the breathing tip I appreciate it a lot🤟

Username: Amara Amara

Date posted: 33w ago

Remember, all humans make mistakes, and with those mistakes, we grow and gather experiences. All the thoughts that made you hurt yourself were because of OCD. Also, OCD makes us ruminate about our mistakes, even though what is bothering you may not even be real or something you ever did. But even if you did do it, it's okay. Just be kind to yourself and forgive yourself. If one of your friends made the same mistake, how would you help them? Treat yourself the same way. You are still in the first part of your life,it's normal to make mistakes.

Username: Don’tLoveDrama-itLovesMeDon’tLoveDra...

Date posted: 33w ago

@Anonymous here. I genuinely appreciate you taking the time to type all that🫶

Username: Amara Amara

Date posted: 33w ago

You're welcome. I really wish you be happy and never ever hurt yourself. You are so worthy always remember this.

Username: Don’tLoveDrama-itLovesMeDon’tLoveDra...

Date posted: 33w ago

@Anonymous here. Thank you is an understatement🤟

Username: Amara Amara

Date posted: 33w ago

@Don’tLoveDrama-itLovesMe You're welcome 🙂

Username: cooldude02

Date posted: 3y ago

Is wanting to purposefully hurt yourself to get out the stress or guilt of doing something incorrectly something anybody else experiences? I would think harm ocd but isn't that just the fear of doing it to other people? So maybe it's my real event. But I don't want to hurt myself, I feel like I have to or problems do not get resolved and I'm in the wrong, no matter how minor it is. I even relapsed with these thoughts because I left food out overnight and my boyfriend got understandably mad. I've seriously been struggling going without traditionial self harm these past few months and it feels like something is missing, and if I do feel some kind of pain it will "go away". It's starting to feel like a ritual but I don't know what it would be. The thought of using a belt to whip myself is getting a lot more intense by the day but I know if I act on it my boyfriend will be able to tell, I'm assuming it would leave marks. I've always been this way before, very submissive in personality and feeling like I need to be punished, even prior to the abusive relationship I was in years ago. Is this actually ocd too or an excuse for my previous addiction to self harm??

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 48w ago

Am I lying to myself?

I struggle most with harm OCD+real event+false memories. The mental rumination gets exhausting. I constantly beat myself up over past mistakes and will fill in the pieces I don’t remember with the worst case scenario. I self soothe by reminding myself I am not a bad person and my worries are disproportionate to the actual situation due to the fact I struggle with OCD. But I quickly get interrupted with an intrusive thought telling me “it is that bad and you’re pinning it as OCD to down play it and avoid accountability”. Anyone else struggle with this?

Username: Sammyanns

Date posted: 44w ago

Maybe made an ERP mistake

I haven’t posted here in a while. I’ve been in ERP therapy and it’s been slow but I feel better, even though it’s only been a few months. The problem is, we’re starting slow because my trigger is sharp objects, and I think I made a mistake. The guy i’m seeing is at work and asked me to prep dinner by cutting the chicken and I thought even though i haven’t used a sharp object to cut meat in MONTHS, I thought I maybe could do it. Well, I cut the chicken and it was extremely thick, and made me have the worst intrusive thoughts. Did I mess up? I’m kind of freaking out. Did I get satisfaction from cutting into a thick meat? I’m scared

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