Gay/Bi OCD back, back again

Okay so I have been struggling with HOCD for so fucking long. I never felt like I had crushes on boys growing up but I wasn’t attracted to girls either (this was through 5th grade). Until 6th grade hit. I remember it like it was yesterday. I had the thought walking up the stairs and it was “You’re lesbian.” And ever since that thought was there and I fought it I have been dealing with all types of OCD ever since (been going on for 7 years). And only this year I found it was OCD. But it’s hard because I don’t know if I’m actually gay or I convinced myself I’m gay because I gave up and gave in. Now whenever I see I pretty girl I feel tingling. And I wanted to prove to myself that I wasn’t a lesbian so I look up pretty pictures of girls with their boobs out and I loved it. And I wanna make out with a girl so intensely. But then at the same I don’t wanna be in a relationship with a girl and I wanna marry a guy and I just desperately wanted to be like by a guy. But I get so horny whenever girls are in bikinis and stuff. But I have OCD and I’m so confused.

Hi just for reference, I’m a girl, I’m almost 17 and I’ve been boy crazy for pretty much all my life. I- I don’t even know what to think anymore, I identify as straight and enjoy thinking about men sexually and emotionally, but I can also masterbate to women weirdly enough? I’ve been diagnosed with pure ocd and I have no desire to have any sexual or emotional relationships with women in real life, and I’ve had hocd for over a year now, but I can masterbate to weird things sometimes and I know I’m not supposed to but I compulsively search things up very often and from what I’ve found most people would say that it would mean that I’m bi. The idea of being bi or gay has made me hyperventilate and cry god knows how many times, at this point I wouldn’t even be angry if I was bi or gay but I know that I’m not. My head keeps telling me that since I can masterbate to gay thoughts or lesbian thoughts sometimes that it means that I’m not straight even though I have no desire to do anything even remotely close to that in real life. This is one of my worst themes of ocd so far as compared to other people who have hocd they don’t get turned on or finish thinking about these things and I do but I don’t identify as bi or gay. I just, I don’t know what to do anymore? I was hoping someone on here goes through the same thing? And I’d really rather not hear that it’s just me denying it, I have a few people I talk to and occasionally when I bring it up they just say I’m in denial so I really don’t know what to do anymore.

Hello, I’m 22F. I have always had crushes on men and have dated men. I never really CARED for sex much but I would still do it. I watch lesbian porn or anything that stimulates the girl more/ what I would enjoy. I fantasize about getting with a girl/ wanting to do things with a girl because of how good it would feel. However, I’ve been in a relationship with a guy for 2 years. Before him, I used to really like another guy. I can’t differentiate between whether I am lesbian, BI, or just straight with normal fantasies. I can’t think/ imagine myself in a relationship with a girl but I guess it wouldn’t be bad to get with a girl at the same time. Sex is just sex. However, I started having obsessive thoughts about my sexuality 2 years ago since then I’ve been diagnosed with health anxiety also. I don’t know, could it be that I’m just not that into my current boyfriend that it makes me question my sexuality? Is it it possible that he might not be so attractive to me that it makes me feel / think what if I am not straight? How can you differentiate between intrusive OCE or the reality / truth of something?? I don’t recall ever having a crush on a girl but I still see certain men and acknowledge how good looking they are and imagine being with them.