How can I tell the difference??

How can I tell the difference between real urges and ocd screwing with me? I wake up in the morning and the first thing that happens is I start seeing harm images/thoughts. But now it’s starting to feel like I want those things, even though I don’t. Like it just feels like normal thoughts because I’m consciously thinking of them and it feels like my brain or body wants me to do these awful things. I know in my heart and my “normal” brain that this is not something I’d want, but it still is the first thing I see in the morning and I’m really starting to question how I actually feel. And if it will ever leave. Is that normal for this??? How do any of you ever tell the difference between these at this point?

Annux

Date posted: 1y

But also don't rush yourself and it will take time

Holly1721

Date posted: 1y

@Annux If you don’t mind me asking what medicine? I’m taking meds, but the dose takes 6-12 weeks to help OCD… wish medicine was magic 🤪

Annux

Date posted: 1y

@Holly1721 I used sertraline and fluanxol, but in my country it has names like that, maybe in your country they are under another name, you can google it. Also i took for a short period of time xanax, but it was at the very start to calm me down

Ellasmama

Date posted: 1y

Can it start to feel like your nature has changed and you actually want/have accepted doing the horrible things you’re seeing and thinking of? Especially with harm?? Even though I know it’s not something I would ever be okay with??

Annux

Date posted: 1y

You are so seen. No, you still are not dangerous. Trust your second thought, not the first one. OCD sometimes can trick you SO WELL, that you don't know what to think or believe and that also is OCD to think that you like your intrusive thoughts. Also if you are questioning all of your bad thoughts, then that alone tells you are safe. Someone who would actually like those absurd things or believe in them, then they would not question themselves, ask for reassurance and so on. Make peace with everything you feel and slowly those horrible things in your head will fade away. Been there for a long time, you got this!

Ellasmama

Date posted: 1y

@Annuce Thank you for this. It’s so horrible. I keep seeing this god-awful horror movie playing in my head of my beloved dog and it’s like…I don’t want to keep her if I could be capable of these horrible things to her. It’s all I see. It attacked the one thing in this world I thought I’d never hurt. I see her constantly getting sliced up with knives, or pulled apart by them and sometimes in the images it’s me doing it and it’s killing me. I’m so scared. I feel like the content is so bad it must mean something because there’s no one else I’ve seen with OCD with these kinds of images. I’m so scared.

Ellasmama

Date posted: 1y

@Anonymous It feels like I would do these things to her. Or be okay with it. I don’t understand what to do.

Annux

Date posted: 1y

@Anonymous Believe me, i know how horrible it is. I had this last year and i actually told my boyfriend to put away anything sharp or harmful, because i thought that i would snap and do something to him or my cat. I would avoid even looking towards knifes bc it would drive my thoughts into spiral, and yes, one of the scariest moments was the feeling like i needed to do something bad, like i wanted to do harmful things and i would question myself every second of the day if this is really me. Actually those thoughts are about the things you care about the most, OCD is a bi**h and gets you right in the spot, thats why it is so scary. But it gets better! Don't be scared and of course go seek help, it is the best you can do. Stay strong!

Holly1721

Date posted: 1y

@Annux Thank you for posting your comment. I feel seen. How did you overcome it?

Annux

Date posted: 1y

@Holly1721 just accepting my thoughts and not fighting them, medication and therapy. Few months and everything went back to normal. But i think the key was to not trying to push away my thoughts, because it is quite simple- the more you try to avoid those thoughts, the more you are thinking. Just take a deep breath, accept the thought and dont panic, overtime you will see that those thoughts were just like a cloud, it came and went away.

lu22

Date posted: 24w

Harm ocd come back

Suddenly I started ruminating again but I no longer get bad anxiety over the thoughts but it feels like the ‘urges’ are still there and it’s making it seem more real that these are true. Why am I having urges without the anxiety or it’s weird like i don’t even know when im anxious maybe i got use to the feeling of being anxious but it feels too real and I get these weird thought that are like ‘imagine you was evil anyways’ or ‘imagine you want to be but your in denial’ or the worst makes it feel like you would like acting on the thoughts even if you choose not to do it and it feels really real. The thoughts are about stabbing and it felt so real and I started imaging it on purpose to ‘test’ myself but it doesn’t ever feel like I hate it enough or don’t want it like I feel numb to everything and it feels really real like I want it or do want to do it but I’m just choosing not to and it’s scary but I use to get so much anxiety over this and now nothing now it feels like I don’t even feel like I ‘hate’ it or I should know that I don’t want to do that? Instead of sitting there experimenting with the thoughts to see. I want it to feel like I don’t want it and don’t like it I constantly feel like I’m lying about not wanting this, but it’s concerning me a lot because it feels so real that I like it or want it and there was one point where it felt like it was about to happen and that I wanted it and now that’s made me think there is something wrong with me or that I want to give in to it 🙁 please I don’t belive anything I don’t even belive I am sad it feels so real that it was about to happen or I wanted it and I don’t know what to do I was fine before and suddenly I started ruminating and now this

lu22

Date posted: 23w

I really need advice harm ocd

I know we’re not meant to ask for reassurance but I’m currently not in therapy and I need help, it feels scarily real and I feel like I’m not anxious or worried over the thoughts. I had stabbing thoughts about someone I care about and I started deliberately imagining them to test myself to see if I hate it or not but instead it felt like I knew how it feels to stab someone and like the feeling of doing that physical action and I swear it is the worst thing I have ever experienced as well I had moments where it felt like It was about to happen or I keep getting this really sick ‘happy’ feeling that I want to do that and I don’t know what that is but it feels incredibly real almost like I was getting a happy feeling or wanted to do that thing and jsut wasn’t giving into it and now I’m thinking I’m actually evil and it feels like I get a pleasurable feeling over the thought of doing that and would want to do it?? Because I ‘like’ the feeling of doing it or it would ‘feel’ good I swear I really don’t know what to do it feels incredibly real I feel like I can’t even say that I’m worried or scared because I feel like I’m lying and actually want it and have evil desires I’m really concerned, I have never done anything bad in my life, I feel like what if through experimenting and imagining the thoughts to test myself I have suddenly discovered I like it because it feels extremely real that I would ‘enjoy’ or like Doing that evil thing and it’s really concerning, i don’t understand I was fine a few days ago and suddenly I’m experiencing this? Is it possible to suddenly become evil i don’t want to be evil, but what if i like it and my desire to not be evil isn’t as strong as this ‘happy feeling’ i wish I can be normal I don’t want any of this please but I swear I feel like there is something wrong with me, I think this is the worst I’ve ever felt, like it feels like I want it and would enjoy it and it’s making me feel really worried but at the same time I don’t even know if I’m worried please help I need advice

Conquering_OCD

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 22w

Knowing the difference

Does anyone have any advice for how to know the difference between ocd and real feelings/thoughts? Sometimes an intrusive thought will come in and I immediately know it’s ridiculous and I can just leave it alone and it won’t bother me but other times I really really don’t know. It’s when ocd hijacks and twists my real feelings and thoughts and tries to manipulate me into believing they’re something they’re not or something that doesn’t align with my true morals or intentions. But since it’s twisting and mixing with real feelings I get so confused and scared. Everything gets jumbled and I feel like I can’t trust myself or my own mind. Yet other times and other topics I can laugh off and push away just fine. Make it make sense. And then I start to think well maybe I don’t have ocd at all and I’m just in denial because I don’t want to accept that these scary/concerning things are true about myself. Or maybe that’s just the ocd talking.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

How can I tell the difference??

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community