tay_may19
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Bad place
Is there a point to living anymore
Karotajs-theanxiousgogettergirlKarotajs-the...
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Yes. Really. Ive been there and thought the same thing. Please hang in there! I know how hard it is and i know what its like too reach that point. People need you! You are strong. Some days its all i can do to shower or get out of bed. Just putting one foot in front of the other. I feel for you.
justlivejustlive
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Yes always. Please seek help immediately if you are actively thinking of doing something to hurt yourself. I know how tough it is but I promise you life is better with you here. It can and will get better. Hold on and keep fighting you are stronger than your OCD! Sending so much love and healing your way
Ryan787Ryan787
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Yes, people love you. This community loves you. Sometimes it gets too heavy, remind yourself that you can overcome these things, no matter how loud the thoughts are.
anonymous12783927anonymous127...
- Date posted
- 32w ago
throughout all of this i have had this mindset countless of times, but each time i have gotten better and so will you i promise it gets better. i am struggling badly right now as well so i understand how you feel, however we need to stay positive because letting ourselves feel helpless will only make it worse unfortunately. i know how extremely hard it is to stay positive through all this but it really helps to just try, even if you dont believe it right now its good to tell yourself that eventually you WILL feel better. if nothing else, time will heal. youve got this i wish you the absolute best. if you need someone to talk to i can talk
Courage2ContinueCourage2Cont...
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Hey, I’m sorry you’re going through this right now! I may be way off the mark, but it sounds like you’re in a lot of emotional pain, and are struggling to find a way to get it to stop, and are hoping to get some kind of community support? Are you lacking any support outside of this app, or is there anyone who you feel comfortable talking to about this? Regardless, we can figure this out! Is there something in particular that’s triggered you to feel this way, or does it feel more like it just came out of the blue?
tay_may19tay_may19
- Date posted
- 32w ago
@Courage2Continue What I’ve been experiencing has been coming in waves. The feeling is always in the back of my mind but sometimes it just flares up like it did yesterday. I’m doing okay now and I do have a therapist but I haven’t seen her in over a month and I just don’t wanna share to much and be admitted to the hospital.
Courage2ContinueCourage2Cont...
- Date posted
- 32w ago
@tay_may19 Oh good, I’m glad you’re doing better! It’s okay to not be doing great too, that’s why we’re all here! OCD can be brutal most days, and the point isn’t to necessarily feel happy all the time, but to feel less alone and have permission to feel all the emotions as they come up, and know you aren’t going to be judged for it. There’s a reason a lot of people who are depressed don’t seek out help, and it’s usually because there’s this huge weight of “you need to change because you shouldn’t feel x/y/z, and if you can’t feel better then there’s something wrong with you,” but no one really asks why it’s so hard for someone experiencing depression to talk about their feelings. Usually depression starts because the individual already doesn’t feel like they have a right to be able to experience all their emotions without getting punished or backlash for them, and it’s really important that we build up a community for each other where we can openly talk about these things! I don’t know if your therapist is a NOCD therapist, or an OCD specialist, but I know once I opened up more to my therapist about what was going on with me and told her the details of everything, I felt better. Weirdly enough, what looks like planning for a suicidal person is actually compulsions for others, and I always felt so weird that I needed to keep self harm things around to feel better. Especially because I didn’t use them! And it turns out I was using them compulsively to show myself that I wasn’t going to follow through. I thought my therapist was for sure going to send me to inpatient, but she was extremely understanding and we worked it out! It was nice to finally speak to someone who exhibited trust in me to be able to handle my own emotions, and it was very liberating to experience that! I really hope that you can experience that too!
tay_may19tay_may19
- Date posted
- 32w ago
@Courage2Continue Thank you for sharing that I really do appreciate it. I’m gonna try my best to schedule something with my therapist and psychiatrist to talk about my symptoms.
ughhhhughhhh
- Date posted
- 32w ago
Ive had thoughts like this all the time please dont give up no matter how hard it is :( stay strong thiw community supports you
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stuckonathought
- Date posted
- 23w ago
I don’t know what I’m meant to do
I’ve recently become unemployed and the journey to finding a new job is honestly unbearable. I struggle with a major lack of self confidence and I don’t believe I’m good at anything nor smart enough for it, so whenever I look at job websites and see different things advertised I panic. Even with what I’ve wanted to do for years, the thought of going out and doing that makes me feel horrendous because I don’t think I’m capable of doing it. And what doesn’t help is the fact I’ve told my parents this and they just scream at me saying I can’t sit around doing nothing every day when that’s already something I don’t want to do. I want a job, I want to do something I enjoy, I like working I do, and once I’m it in I know I’ll enjoy it, but there’s certain things stopping me from going for it. I hate myself over every possible level to the thought of people seeing me everyday is making me panic, I don’t think I’m very intelligent so anything that requires me to do maths or organise numbers or anything like that is out of the question. I’ve worked in hospitality for 7 years, doing shit I despise and I honestly have hated every moment of it so I can’t go back there. It’s all scaring me, all making me feel like I’m just incapable of doing anything right, I genuinely just don’t even want to wake up tomorrow because the thought of living this life for the rest of my life is ridiculous. I don’t want to do it. I don’t have anything I’m good at, there’s nothing I enjoy what the hell am I meant to do with that? I’m honestly so stuck. Everyone keeps saying “beggars can’t be choosers” but this is my fucjing life and I have to do a shit job that makes me want to throw myself off a 30 story building till I’m 70? Fuck no. What kind of life is that? Just so I can make money? And afford bills? And pay to live? wtf I don’t even want to be here so why am I doing that. I don’t enjoy living I a really fucking hate it. And working down the local grocery store is just not gonna make me wanna be here any longer. I really hate it here and now I have to find a job that I’ll hate? I’m so stuck
GuiltyGrapes
- Date posted
- 22w ago
Why am I still here?
My life has been hell, and I don’t know how to move on. I (15M) did awful things when I started high school, thinking being sexual was the way to connect. I crossed boundaries, overshared, and kept flirting with friends and making sexual jokes, even after they said no (all over text). One friend stopped talking to me and can’t even look at me now. I feel like a monster. Why shouldn’t I be locked up? If I got therapy, I feel like I’d be sent jail. How can I ever move on?Then there were these 2 guys who were older than me one was 16 one was 17. The 16 yr old was introduced to me by my online friend who is my best friend and I begged the 16 yr old for pics (idk how it started but after my friends ex randomly messaged me and sent me pictures and then blocked me right after I think I became addicted to chasing that high) the 16 yr old eventually sent me a pic but it was real and I stopped bugging him on it after that but i feel so bad I did that but my friend tells me not to feel bad cause the guy was weird but I still feel bad. Then the 17 yr old I did the same thing with him but went too far when I tried getting pics from him by using my best friends ass pics she sent me (she was 15) I don’t think I grasped how wrong this was but that’s not an excuse she eventually found it when I told her after she tried getting pics from the guy herself to try and help me and the guy got mad when she stopped talking to him cause we found it weird talking to him. I told her about how I sent the pics she said she felt sick but forgave me cause she thought I was gonna harm myself. Fast forward the guy told me after I had still been flirting with him that I s@d him (we never met in person ever) and I felt so guilty and apologized a lot and he got annoyed and told me that he had been kinda manipulative to me and kept me in a loop of mystery and I don’t talk to him anymore. But one of my other friends stopped talking to me after I was being by too emotionally taxing on him because I became very depressed and didn’t wanna life anymore and tried to stop lifing a few times. And now idk if I actually s@d someone if I did that to someone and now I think I’m a pdo and I think I s@d my baby cousins and my little brother and now I’m scared bf I can’t even get help because my parents don’t believe in therapy and even if I wanted to I’m scared because I don’t want to go to jail but I think I deserve it honestly why should a monster like me live.
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