Are they still intrusive?

I’ve been really struggling with urges, a constant numb feeling to everything that feels like I don’t care about things (like my beloved dog) who were the most important to me, and this dizzying pressure in my head that feels like it’s attached to the urges and I can’t think straight or control my own actions. But I’m also scared that since the thoughts are literally constant (they flip around to anything and everything then go back to their greatest hits) and I’m feeling like I wouldn’t care if I did them, they’re not intrusive anymore. Am I losing it? Having harm OCD I never thought could make you feel like you’re actually going to act. Not just be afraid of it.

djflorio

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 48w

Thoughts often attempt to put a meaning or a story to our feelings and emotions, and it's important to remember that they are completely separate. The feelings are real, and they all have useful information in them. The thoughts, however, are only the brain's best guess as to what everything means. In this case, the thoughts are saying that these feelings mean that you don't care about your dog. What you want to practice is recognizing the separation between the thoughts and the feelings. You want to allow yourself to fully feel your feelings, and be completely aware of them at a physical level. As you do this, you will have thoughts about what they "mean," but just allow those to pass by like clouds in the sky. You don't need to tend to those thoughts, you don't need to get rid of them, and you don't need to disprove them. Just keep focusing on how the feelings feel in your body. Over time you may begin to see the real roots of these feelings, untainted by the narrative of the intrusive thoughts. You may find that the numbness and dizziness you're referring to is related to stress, a feeling of being overwhelmed, another aspect of anxiety, or something else. It's all about pausing and taking the time to let the feelings and emotions say what they want to say. The thoughts try to slap on a meaning as quickly as possible, which often leads to delusion. This disconnection between our thoughts and feelings happens all the time. Often people will binge eat food because they think the sensations they feel are hunger, when in reality they are feeling lonely, and they immediately think about eating because that's what made us feel loved and cared-for as children. People also often express anger towards someone because they think they feel angry, when in reality they're afraid. There are many other examples of this. Always remember that your thoughts and your feelings are not the problem. The problem is the resistance of them, and the attempt to get rid of them.

ElleBe

Date posted: 48w

I'm so sorry you're going through this, I've been through a similar obsession and it was really difficult to cope with! I've been to quite a few of the nocd support groups now and this comes up a lot - feeling like you could act on a thought and feel no regret, and that it means the thoughts are true. It really helped me to know how common this is, and that intrusive thoughts might make you feel anxious, or they might not, theyre not significant and dont deserve attention either way. You're allowed to ignore them live life according to your values :)

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 25w

Numb and engaging more with thoughts? Help?

I’ve been feeling a bit stressed lately because my intrusive thoughts aren’t causing as much anxiety as they used to. It almost feels like I’m becoming a little numb to them, and because of that, I’m able to engage with them a bit longer. I don’t feel the usual rush of anxiety to pull away, and in some strange way, I even find myself focusing on them for a few seconds, like I’m actively thinking about them. It’s really stressing me out because I feel like by not feeling that immediate discomfort or anxiety, I’m letting the thoughts stay longer or giving them more power. I feel like part of me almost wants them to be there, and I don’t know if that’s a bad sign? They don’t even feel intrusive. Has anyone else experienced this? I’m just worried that the lack of anxiety is the reason I’m interacting more with these thoughts that would normal scare me. I feel guilt about it later. I am currently withdrawing from medication so that may contribute to this but it’s not the first time I experience this :/

lu22

Date posted: 24w

Harm ocd come back

Suddenly I started ruminating again but I no longer get bad anxiety over the thoughts but it feels like the ‘urges’ are still there and it’s making it seem more real that these are true. Why am I having urges without the anxiety or it’s weird like i don’t even know when im anxious maybe i got use to the feeling of being anxious but it feels too real and I get these weird thought that are like ‘imagine you was evil anyways’ or ‘imagine you want to be but your in denial’ or the worst makes it feel like you would like acting on the thoughts even if you choose not to do it and it feels really real. The thoughts are about stabbing and it felt so real and I started imaging it on purpose to ‘test’ myself but it doesn’t ever feel like I hate it enough or don’t want it like I feel numb to everything and it feels really real like I want it or do want to do it but I’m just choosing not to and it’s scary but I use to get so much anxiety over this and now nothing now it feels like I don’t even feel like I ‘hate’ it or I should know that I don’t want to do that? Instead of sitting there experimenting with the thoughts to see. I want it to feel like I don’t want it and don’t like it I constantly feel like I’m lying about not wanting this, but it’s concerning me a lot because it feels so real that I like it or want it and there was one point where it felt like it was about to happen and that I wanted it and now that’s made me think there is something wrong with me or that I want to give in to it 🙁 please I don’t belive anything I don’t even belive I am sad it feels so real that it was about to happen or I wanted it and I don’t know what to do I was fine before and suddenly I started ruminating and now this

Catlove9

Date posted: 23w

I need guidance or to feel like I am not alone

I was doing so much better with my OCD. I thought I finally figured it out. However, the last two weeks have been a nightmare. It’s like I went from 0-100 all over again. And it’s become scarier than it ever has been. Every other thought is either causing me anxiety or turning into an intrusive thought. Any headache or feeling of derealization, and I start to spiral. My thoughts are becoming more gruesome and feeling more real. The intrusive urges are so bad it feels like at any moment I could actually just snap. It feels like I am about to go crazy. Another hard aspect is when I’m getting these intrusive urges it feels like I want to do it or I don’t care if I do it. I don’t feel like myself. I feel like this disgusting monster who is just going to lose it and I want it to be over. Why is this happening when I was finally better? It makes me feel like it’s not OCD and I’m actually this person and I’m just holding my true self back. I’m sick to my stomach.

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Are they still intrusive?

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