So scared

Im so fucking terrified by my own thoughts. Idk how much longer I can go on like this. Just every single thing my brain produces feels either distorted by OCD or like I've literally done the most deplorable thing any person could do. Can't reach out to a specialist because I don't have the money and too scared too share. So scared that it's real

Kriste

Date posted: 23w

I understand this completely, I feel often like I am a horrible person because of my intrusive thoughts. However, you aren’t a bad person, just downloading this app shows how much you want to change and get help. This means that you are aware and you don’t want to feel this way anymore. Sometimes the best thing you can do is just breathe and try your hardest to erase what you’re thinking, or do something to distract your mind, or call a friend to ask them about their day or to play a video game. For me, I like to pray and repent sometimes for my thoughts or sins, I know that God has me and He has you too. Things WILL get better. Do not let these thoughts control you, even just saying to yourself, no or stop, once you think of a bad thought helps a lot.! I will pray for you!

moon0270

Date posted: 23w

it's really difficult to do because i feel like im lying to people about my true nature:( I can't stand it and my brain keeps spitting out things that might have happened in the past and not being able to tell if it's true or not is draining the life out of me. Thank you so much for your kind thoughts and your prayers. It means more to me than you know ❤️‍🩹

Kylen Ajax Bush

Date posted: 23w

@Kriste I’m a catholic im scared these intrusive thoughts means im a bad person and ill go to hell when I die whether I love Jesus or not (I do)

Kriste

Date posted: 23w

@Kylen Ajax Bush You aren’t a bad person, kylen, as long as you know that you won’t pursue these thoughts. Everyone has dark feelings or thoughts sometimes, that is why Jesus died for us on that cross. God isn’t mad at you, He is glad that you are trying to get help and reach out. You are doing a good job as a Christian, just try to shut the thoughts out as much as you can. Try to do one thing each day that is kind for someone else, you’ll feel like you’re healing!!!

Kriste

Date posted: 23w

@Kriste I know it’s hard to push through the bad thoughts or feelings, but I know you can do it because you are strong, strong enough to realize what you are struggling through and taking the action to get help!!!

[Deleted]

Date posted: 23w

Comment deleted by user

moon0270

Date posted: 23w

it just feels so hopeless because my brain is telling me that ive done something that i never ever thought I'd ever do. it's so hard to feel like i deserve anything and even though it's in the past, i don't want to accept that it's something i'd ever do. sorry you're struggling as well🫂🫂

Justsurviving

Date posted: 23w

@moon027097 I am battling the same thing as well it's really bad I felt like I needed to see this post because I really feel like this

moon0270

Date posted: 23w

@Justsurviving i am so sorry that you are suffering as well. i hope that it gets better 🤍🫂

Blueberrycows

Date posted: 23w

Who marked my comment as spam 🙄 ugh

moon0270

Date posted: 23w

aw, it's okay 🫶🏽 thank you for commenting. you're always kind and helpful!🫂

Blueberrycows

Date posted: 23w

@moon027097 Sure thing ❤️ you’re not alone .. you’re more than welcome to reach out

Lizethh

Date posted: 25w

Having a horrible day sciz-ocd

It's one of those days where I can't get out of my head, the anxiety feels so debilitating, all I can do is cry, the intrusive thoughts won't stop and I can't keep myself from my compulsions, I feel so alone, my fear of hallucinating sounds went to fear of hallucinating people or things, to the worst of all fear of becoming delusional, my mind is plagued with "delusions" that I've read online through all the compulsive research I've done, earlier I saw a shadow next to a light pole and my mind immediately went "what if little people are watching you" my grandmother had delusions like that growing up so that's where it comes from I think, no I don't actually believe that little people are watching me but what if I do believe it, what if I am psychotic, what if I start believing people are out to get me, im so terrified I can't shake the fear of this I can't accept it I don't know how, im terrified that my ocd will forever plague my mind and I will never feel better I'll always be fighting this monster and I will never feel peace again, I don't want to be alone in a mental hospital, I don't want to go to the doctor and them tell me I'm crazy or psychotic, I don't want to become a burden to my family, i dont want to scare my family please I just want to feel better 😭😓 I don't want reassurance about the intrusive thoughts I just want someone to tell me it'll get better and I won't feel stuck forever

things_willg...

Date posted: 25w

Scared

i’m so scared im going to lose control and end up locked up or something. this is so exhausting!! i worry that what i have isn’t OCD and that im genuinely insane and im gonna end up in big trouble or that the urges i have are going to actually happen. i dont want to think these things ! i feel like a horrible human being!!

tayanominous

Date posted: 25w

Panic attack and guilty

Im so scared i wish my brain would send me in to derealisation, im 13 years old and my OCD honestly gives me the most disgusting thoughts I can’t take it anymore my head turns everything into a sexual thought and I can’t even look at my own mom anymore because of them they are really and honestly the most messed up thoughts I could ever think of and I’m so scared idk what to do, I’m on Prozac and going to start ERP soon but I’m still so insanely scared I have lost myself, I’m only just been diagnosed with ocd and don’t know everything abt it but just keep on panicking about everything😭😞😢

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