Sunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
Ben84Ben84
- Date posted
- 5y
I can understand a bit. I'm able to afford typical therapy, but not an OCD specialist. I can't give you the reassurance you're seeking just like you can't give me the reassurance I'd like. I can tell you that I work with elementary school kids. POCD fears it's head there, but what really gets me now is seeing some of these kids as they grow up. I notice that they're attractive and get sexually intrusive thoughts about them which I find harder to deal with because I knew them when they were younger. I question whether I am and maybe have always been attracted to them. It's extremely uncomfortable, but try and sit with the anxiety. Try doing what you would have done if these thoughts hadn't come up. We're in a similar boat and I'm pulling for you ☺.
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you so much, specially for not give reassurance, I hope you get better and I will try to go to a therapist as soon as possible and I hope this will go away but I will work for it
Ben84Ben84
- Date posted
- 5y
What's up?
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
It's that I watch gilmore girls and in the last season it's a little girl and I don't know why I looked up her name, now she is like 18 or 19, like me and I start to following her on Instagram and have fantasies with her, but with she is right now that she have my same age, not in the show, and now I feel guilty a lot and I don't know, I feel like a monster
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 I'm a monster
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 I'm a monster, I shouldn't be alive
Ben84Ben84
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 Well, what do you think is going on in this situation ☺?
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@Ben84 I don't know, I just feel horrible, like I wish little kids, horrible horrible horrible
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 But I didn't fantasize with her when she was little, I did when she was 18 19, like me
Ben84Ben84
- Date posted
- 5y
Is it possible your OCD is perverting an age-appropriate fantasy?
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
Maybe, I don't know, I don't fantasize with her when she was little, I did when she was grow up, like 18 19
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
I'm so afraid, I feel like a monster, I'm horrible
Ben84Ben84
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 Are you currently seeing a therapist?
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@Ben84 I can't, I don't have money, I wish go, but I can't
flowerladyflowerlady
- Date posted
- 5y
Thanks for your honesty Ben.. Try to sit with anxiety without performing compulsions. We can't control thoughts
HeelloHeello
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey friend, we cant offer you a solution, it will be a reassurance. But looking at what you said you grow up watching someone and then now started to like the person and the person now is above 18, not a minor, but because you saw the person since she was younger, I agree with the others, try to sit with it and dont perform compulsion, remember compulsions can be mentally too and try to talk with a specialist. Hope you get better
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
I mean I watch the show like in 2017 but then,I don't know since when I search her name, I don't know why but I did it and I see how she is right know I really like her, but right know, that's what I'm afraid of
HeelloHeello
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 You said it, you liked her right now, not before, not in 2017 and since you dont remember when you searched it doesnt matter anymore. This are intrusive thoughts, one of their characteristics is making people believing they are something they arent or that they did something they didnt and make the person guilty over it
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 I mean like I knew she would be like 18 or 19 because the show it's like from 2000 and the last season aired 2007 so she would be like my age, I feel so sick
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@Newstage Yeah, horrible
HeelloHeello
- Date posted
- 5y
@cami0102 So you probably grow up with her, at the same pace
SunflowerSunflower
- Date posted
- 5y
@Newstage Exactly, like the same time, we have like the same age or maybe I'm like 1 year older
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