- Date posted
- 5y
- Date posted
- 5y
The worst part is some of these people purportedly have OCD themselves. How can they have the same illness but have so little sympathy for a different theme, I don't understand.
- Date posted
- 5y
Once someone related their attitude to calling people with harm OCD murderers, they seemed to give up on the tack that POCD is particularly special. But seems that letting anything he finds triggering as a child abuse survivor even exist here is unfair on him, so those people shouldn't be welcome. The bent on twisting it into "glorification of trauma" was even more bizarre. Clearly this person is still dealing with a lot of their own shit and felt they needed to lash out. I think sometimes when PTSD has got you bad, you don't have any compassion for yourself let alone any to spare for others.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Louw You're right actually. Lashing out is usually a symptom of serious inner turmoil. I just hope they learn how to channel those feelings more appropriately.
- Date posted
- 5y
I wasn't on the forum yesterday to see what happened, but i gather that a post about pocd was disrespectful and caused lots of strong emotions. It hurts my heart that there was this disruption in our community. At the same time, I am proud of the ways members have reached out to each other to heal the wounds and support each other. I do NOT have the administrative power to take down or change posts on the forum, nor to communicate with individuals through private messaging to problem solve one on one. I am reaching out directly to the people that do so that they can take action to ensure psychological safety for ALL members of our community, including the individual who made the contentious post. In the meantime, I would ask that we stop reposting what was said and refrain from calling anyone names. Doing those things may feel good in the moment, but increase the hurt feelings on all sides.
- Date posted
- 5y
Thank you Katie!
- Date posted
- 5y
I am so sorry you guys had to read this stupid post :( pocd is like every other ocd themes I hope you all know that?
- Date posted
- 5y
I’m so sorry to hear someone judged your theme! ☹️
- Date posted
- 5y
Ahh, not my theme, it just needed to be said. <3
- Date posted
- 5y
Pocd is my second worse theme and I didnt see the original post but I dont feel ashamed to tell people that yeah this is sick and I think it a lot. And ultimately no themes are worse than others they're all a nightmare in their own ways.
- Date posted
- 5y
Yes, I second this - once we start making the irrational move of excluding people for having particularly dark themes, where do we stop? I have a theme accusing me of being a racist monster - am I therefore a Klanswoman? Are people with harm OCD murderers in waiting, as others pointed out this logic would lead to? Let’s not go down that path.
- Date posted
- 5y
People have all sorts of wild things in their heads, and can’t freely choose exactly which bits of mental noise show up in their heads and which don’t. What matters is how they they choose to handle it, how they act. We of all people should know that merely having a thought doesn’t condemn someone. For example, I’m transgender. I know that this entire society is soaked with transphobia, and realistically, I expect transphobic thoughts to enter the heads of the people around me. What lets me know I can trust someone, though, is that they *handle* those transphobic thoughts well, handle them in a way that doesn’t harm me. People with POCD should be welcome here.
- Date posted
- 5y
It's very telling of what kind of people they are.
- Date posted
- 5y
What happened?
- Date posted
- 5y
I have a copy of it on my clipboard but the posts are gone now I think. 'Pedophilia is not a normal OCD thought. Feeling attracted towards minors is not normal in any cases. Get serious help or go to prison don’t post on this app is not for you at all.'. He kept saying that it was his opinion about POCD because it's ok to judge an OCD and then changed it that he was just talking about paedophiles. Maybe he realised it wasn't fair
- Date posted
- 5y
@ally.bo.bally We are avoiding sharing the comment further. Doing so just prolongs the hurt feelings and conflict
- Date posted
- 5y
@NOCD Advocate - Katie We should know what comments are being censured so that we can judge them for ourselves.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? Let's not go down that path please. Let us judge at whose expense? Some people can get seriously hurt by words. From now on, let's let the moderators and health experts assess what is acceptable and what isn't.
- Date posted
- 5y
@ally.bo.bally The post did not refer to anyone specifically. Believing that it was directed at you is am example of the personalization cognitive distortionhttps://psychcentral.com/lib/15-common-cognitive-distortions/
- Date posted
- 5y
@ally.bo.bally Those feelings are valid and real. You deserve to let them dissipate so you can move on. No matter how much I've insists, checking will not give you long lasting relief, if it gives you any at all
- Date posted
- 5y
@NOCD Advocate - Katie Ack *OCD* not I've
- Date posted
- 5y
@ally.bo.bally Take a deep breath, you are having a big ocd attack! OCD attacks this post because you won’t know the content of the post and will be in uncertainty. But you can do some erp about it ! Sit with uncertainly. I know it is so hard but you can do it. What will it change if it was about you? Nothing! This was a guy who no nothing about ocd. He was not knowing some kind of truth Search on YouTube « ocd attack »there are some great meditation video to deal with it! I am sure you will feel better soon with some erp
- Date posted
- 5y
@bebrave❤️ Know* not no
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC Thank you but no. Health experts are not infallible; in the very recent past my being transgender and a lesbian were officially classed as psychiatric disorders. Finding ways to make sure that people can choose not to see hurtful comments is reasonable, but making it so that we can’t know what the comments were even if we want to is not. This is not about the content of the hurtful comments, which I agree was indeed terrible and misguided, but about our ability to have some checks on how our OCD- healing space is moderated.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? If that's the case, then the community has already spoken. His comments were flagged several times yesterday and many people both with POCD and without POCD complained about his comments, so they were removed. You missed it.
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC That’s dodging the point, which is that we should be able to know what moderation choices are being made on what comments.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? Why are you fighting with me? I told you, they deleted his comment because people complained about it and flagged it several times. Not because they just felt like it. You want them to repost it again just so you cna see it? What about the people who don't see it today. Should be reposted again tomorrow? What the hell is the matter with you?
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC There is nothing the matter with me. Please check yourself. I have no interest in fighting with you. I am saying, as I have been from the beginning, that we should be able to see what comments are being censured *if we desire to*, so that we know what moderation decisions are being made and can decide for ourselves if we agree with them or not. This can be done in a way that does not needlessly expose hurtful comments to those who do not wish to see them. This is undeniably a relevant concern: the video just posted by McGrath in response to people’s anger over the comment, for example, didn’t even mention what the comment was about. That we are here to process through and heal from OCD does not make us children to be lorded over by moderators with no transparency. Their decision was undeniably correct this time around, but that doesn’t mean it always will be.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? We are on the same side here. Please, you have to understand me. There is a risk that, if we make the comment available for people to choose to see, as you are suggesting, there is a greater chance that people with POCD, or otherwise, will self-harm by using the comment to test themselves or seek reassurance about whether or not they are really pedophile. This is OCD afterall. We all harm ourselves everyday by reading articles about pedophilia, psychopathy, homosexuality or whatever is related to our OCD theme just to test ourselves. If we make the comment available to see, there is a risk that will happen. But this is supposed to be a safe space, so we can't let that happen. Unfortunately, moderation must be done this way, by trusting the people running the app and immediately removing things soppted by the community. Do you see why now? I'm not trying to fight here and I'm really sorry doctors have treated you the way they have. Psychiatry has historically been a very oroblamtic field when it comes to homosexuality and transgender rights. I'm sure it still has a long way to go, but I really hope this doesn't make you completely distrustful of the process.
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC I understand that, but “safe spaces” for anxiety are impossible, and are not a good reason to make moderation here completely opaque and impossible to keep track of. People can easily use all sorts of posts & features on this app to seek reassurance, to check, and so on - and then they can switch to their browser and use Google to access an unlimited supply of material for doing the same. Seeking completely safe refuges from anxiety is likely to feed the anxiety, as it turns into seeking certainty and narrows the world that our brains mark out for usas safe enough. When my OCD gets bad, it starts telling me that I don’t have OCD at all. I could easily start using nearly every post on this app to check for the truth of that OCD theme. There are safer and riskier social spaces, to be sure, but nowhere is 100% “safe,” and I don’t think we should seek for this space to be freed from any danger or trigger at all. Hiding offending posts behind a tab or something, maybe moving them to a special moderation zone, and telling the offending individual off, or banning them if they’re engaging in continual hurtful behavior, is enough.
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC I hope we are on the same side - we should be. I came here to object to the moderators’ way of operating, not to pick a fight with you.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? I'm sorry, but we will have to respectfully agree to disagree. I believe we should be trying to keep safe spaces as safe and anxiety free as possible through quick and effective moderation, and that's what we should be trying to achieve for anyone who needs a safe space for their illness, whatever it may be. I'm sorry you don't feel that way.
- Date posted
- 5y
@NickC Not at the expense of having some control over our own treatment we shouldn’t, no. So yes, we’ll have to disagree.
- Date posted
- 5y
@Vieira da $$$ilva???? Absolutely.
- Date posted
- 5y
Absolutely.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 19w
I was going to ask for advice and vent after i just had an episode but reading through everyones post on here. I can see that everyone is collectively struggling at the moment and i think we need to utilize this community for more than just sharing our sadness. Nothing is wrong with venting of course but i feel like there isnt enough positive energy here to encourage everyone to keep going. I know asking for reassure feels like a must sometimes and trust me everyone has asked for it, it was a heavy compulsion of mine. But reassure is not what you need. It will make it worse everyone please trust me. Instead of letting out mind win we must support each other, understand our struggles but also share out wins. I feel like we dont use this community enough for finding friendship among us or spreading enough happiness. OCD Is not a happy disorder but seeing that everyone here is just here either hating on someone, people being too afraid to ask for help or no one reading peoples post. This place isnt just for our negative thoughts and events to fester we need to support each other here too! Ask for help, comment on peoples post with love everyone is struggling. In this community we should help pull each other out from dark places not let them stay there. I hope everyone who is going through it right has a better night/day/afternoon. You’re loved deeply your not a monster, your not evil, your not dirty, your not a heretic your Nothing your thoughts tell you are. Peace to you🤍🤍🤍🤍
- Date posted
- 12w
So I just joined and I’ve been reading through this forum. And I feel a strong sense of compassion for everyone here. Reading about people’s OCD concerns shows me that people with OCD may be particularly sensitive and caring. I have struggled with OCD since I was a kid, but having compassion for other people’s OCD is helping me have compassion for myself. Maybe that perspective might help another person. If we can have grace for another person, we can give ourselves grace as well. I’m working on self forgiveness and gentleness when normally I beat myself up for my intrusive thoughts
- Date posted
- 8w
It kinda mind boggling to me how OCD can even cause stuff to happen to us physically as well. And it all feeling real. It only reminds me how flawed our bodies really are. If people were to hear of our situations they'd call us names and choose to stay ignorant. People fear what they cannot understand. Before this I could have possible have been one of them, but here I am. OCD really goes for anybody. Does not matter what ethnicity, religion, sexual orientation you are. It is a twisted disorder that likes to make others lives harder. If I were to tell myself before this that this would happen, I would'nt believe it. I was convinced I am evil, I cried for weeks. I had to sleep in my parents bedroom for a period of time cause I couldn't face the darkness alone. This application helped me greatly during this, cause I learned just as much about OCD as I did about myself. At the same time I get saddened cause I see people going through the exact same, or much worse. If any who come across this post have any questions for me, u can feel free to do so
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