i’m getting freaked out by myself. Please help. I was wondering if it was wrong to have sex with someone if one person was drunk or tipsy and the other wasn’t but they gave consent. I thought for me at least not anyone else, that if i gave consent when inebriated then it would be okay. But also i see how it’s wrong because why would you want to do anything with someone who is under the influence or not be on the same level as someone when doing these things. A guy i was talking to said he didn’t wanna kiss me once because i was tipsy one night and said no matter what he wouldn’t even touch a girl if she had a drink and i completely understand that, but in my mind if i give consent then that’s okay. Is that wrong though? I don’t like how my automatic response wasn’t the same as his. I don’t want to take advantage of someone or anything ever so i searched it up and people were saying that you can’t give consent when inebriated so now i feel like a terrible person. I feel even worse because when i was thinking of scenarios it felt like i was a little turned on and i feel wrong because what if i felt that way because i enjoyed the thought of taking advantage of someone and but i just don’t want to be the type of person that would do that to someone or think it’s okay. This may be tmi but i imagined giving a guy head and he was drunk but he enjoyed it and it turned me on but now i hate myself because that’s literally wrong. I’ve never even had sex before but i’m still worrying about this. Now i know i for sure wouldn’t engage in anything with someone under the influence but i feel like I don’t even know how i felt about this in the beginning, i feel like my mind automatically jumped to me being the worst. Like is kissing someone when one is drunk and the other isn’t wrong? I just want to avoid doing something wrong or taking advantage of someone at all costs but i’m stressed because what if my way of thinking thinks it’s okay to do those things. Like even if my mind is telling me it’s okay i will avoid and not even go near a drunk guy or try anything but i don’t like that I thought that was okay or that my body responded that way when thinking about it. I hate this. I don’t want this to be me but what if it is. Like why do i feel a sense of arousal or a groinal response when i think about it? is it because it’s of a sexual nature? is it misattribution of arousal? Or am i just actually the worst person on earth? I hope it’s everything but the last, but it seems like that’s the truth. Like this is making me want to refrain from engaging in anything sexual with anyone because i just feel wrong as a person now and that no matter what i’ll be taking advantage of them because of my thoughts.

$:/

Date posted: 5y

i feel like this spiraled into something big overtime because i don’t want to take advantage of someone and i necee have before and i just really don’t want to be a bad person, i really don’t, but i feel like this ain’t normal and that no one else but someone who takes advantage of people thinks this way. This is making me scared of myself, even though i haven’t done anything, i’m scared that i will.

$:/

Date posted: 5y

and fucking groinal responses make things 10x fucking worse. like why can’t my body react to things fucking normal. why does everything in life have to be so complicated for me. i can’t even do anything or be with the guy i like because now i’m afraid of who i am, i also would feel terrible to have someone be involved with me and not know who i actually am as a person which is fucking terrible. at this point someone literally just kill me cause we really don’t need another disgusting person out in the world.

$:/

Date posted: 5y

i miss the day’s when everything was normal

dann123

Date posted: 5y

I feel you...

dann123

Date posted: 5y

Completely understand

hateocd123

Date posted: 5y

My boyfriend and I have both had intercourse while either or is inebriated and afterwards never thought anything of it. Idk, I don't really care. I've never been drunk to the point where I didn't remember anything and as a sober person I can look back and say that I enjoyed being drunk or tipsy during sex and he says the same. If I were single and there was an opportunity to hook up with someone inebriated I would not, because I don't know them and I could potentially be taking advantage of them.

$:/

Date posted: 5y

yeah but now i feel stuck on the thought that i want to like give him head when he’s drunk cause i feel like he’d enjoy it more but even just saying that sounds wrong and weird you know. and i feel like i’m trying to justify it in my mind but the more i do the worse it’s making me seem. Like when i think that i don’t mean it in a way that’s doing something to him that he doesn’t want, and i don’t even know if that’s actually something i want to do but my mind has fixated on it to the point where i think it is. And i just feel wrong because why is it a thought of mine of wanting to do something to someone while they’re drunk, and why am i trying to figure out ways in my mind to make it seem okay. Like even though especially now that i’m aware of it being wrong i wouldn’t do it, it doesn’t sit right with me that it’s something that i may want to do or think is okay, and i’ll feel wrong ever doing anything with him because he wouldn’t know that i wanted to do something or i imagined doing something with him that would be considered taking advantage. I’m trying to move past this and not think about it but it just doesn’t sit right with me that i view this as okay.

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond