i’m getting freaked out by myself. Please help. I was wondering if it was wrong to have sex with someone if one person was drunk or tipsy and the other wasn’t but they gave consent. I thought for me at least not anyone else, that if i gave consent when inebriated then it would be okay. But also i see how it’s wrong because why would you want to do anything with someone who is under the influence or not be on the same level as someone when doing these things. A guy i was talking to said he didn’t wanna kiss me once because i was tipsy one night and said no matter what he wouldn’t even touch a girl if she had a drink and i completely understand that, but in my mind if i give consent then that’s okay. Is that wrong though? I don’t like how my automatic response wasn’t the same as his. I don’t want to take advantage of someone or anything ever so i searched it up and people were saying that you can’t give consent when inebriated so now i feel like a terrible person. I feel even worse because when i was thinking of scenarios it felt like i was a little turned on and i feel wrong because what if i felt that way because i enjoyed the thought of taking advantage of someone and but i just don’t want to be the type of person that would do that to someone or think it’s okay. This may be tmi but i imagined giving a guy head and he was drunk but he enjoyed it and it turned me on but now i hate myself because that’s literally wrong. I’ve never even had sex before but i’m still worrying about this. Now i know i for sure wouldn’t engage in anything with someone under the influence but i feel like I don’t even know how i felt about this in the beginning, i feel like my mind automatically jumped to me being the worst. Like is kissing someone when one is drunk and the other isn’t wrong? I just want to avoid doing something wrong or taking advantage of someone at all costs but i’m stressed because what if my way of thinking thinks it’s okay to do those things. Like even if my mind is telling me it’s okay i will avoid and not even go near a drunk guy or try anything but i don’t like that I thought that was okay or that my body responded that way when thinking about it. I hate this. I don’t want this to be me but what if it is. Like why do i feel a sense of arousal or a groinal response when i think about it? is it because it’s of a sexual nature? is it misattribution of arousal? Or am i just actually the worst person on earth? I hope it’s everything but the last, but it seems like that’s the truth. Like this is making me want to refrain from engaging in anything sexual with anyone because i just feel wrong as a person now and that no matter what i’ll be taking advantage of them because of my thoughts.

made out with a guy in my room one night but he was drinking and i was sober. he wasn’t showing signs of drunkness we were able to chat and stuff but now i am distrusting my judgement. i would never intend to take advantage of someone.

I'm really, really scared. I feel like my boyfriend and I went too far. We both belong to the same faith, and we've both committed from a young age to remain pure and chaste until marriage. And we've never had sex before, but we've talked a lot about it. And we've done things like laying on top of each other. Gently rubbing up against each other. He's kissed my chest. And I've send some pictures to him. Not nude pictures, but just ones that are a little revealing, and the guilt has been eating me alive. And of course, I know it's okay to feel sexual feelings, and it's good to have them and acknowledge them. They're vital feelings, and it's just us being human. It's a natural part of biology, and it's okay to be sexually attracted to one another, and to embrace that. It's something to be happy about. In our faith, we are cautioned against arousing sexual feelings in each other before marriage. And my boyfriend and I have absolutely done that, over and over again, when I've known better. Which makes me feel really guilty. Super guilty. I've struggled with scrupulosity for a long time. A really long time. And when I had a therapist who helped me to embrace my sexuality in a positive way, she really challenged my scrupulosity, and it helped me to attain a healthier view of the both myself and my standards, which is great. But in situations like this, I don't know if I'm dealing with scrupulous thoughts that are trying to make me fee feel guilty unnecessarily, or if I'm dealing with godly sorrow, like the kind of guilt that you feel so that you're urged to repent. And my boyfriend and I have kept an open dialogue about all of this since we started dating, and I think we've been communicating well, which is good. But we both agreed that last night, in particular, we really crossed the line, and I feel so guilty about it. We both agreed that this is a joint effort and that there's no blame to be put entirely on either one of us. My boyfriend has been really, really gentle about this subject, and I really appreciate his openness and honesty. But he doesn't see what we've done as anything to repent about. And even though he totally understands if I feel differently, I DO feel like we need to repent, both of us, not just me. He's open to hear any of my thoughts, even if they happened to be negative against him. And I appreciate that. But the guilt has been eating me alive. All the times I've made him moan on purpose because I like it. All the times I've let him talk so dirty to me. And the times I talked so dirty back to him. And I'm just comparing myself to other couples of our faith who may or may not have struggled, because obviously we're not the only ones to struggle. But we've done so much. We've talked so dirty to each other, and we're not even close to being engaged or anything. I just feel so filthy, and I feel ashamed for wanting to go further. A couple years ago, like I said, I had a therapist who really helped me to embrace my sexuality while also staying true to my faith. And I feel like I've really come a long way since then, but this feels different, because masturbation and embracing your own sexuality is different than teasing sex with another person. I just don't know how severe this really is. And I'm worried that I'll be reprimanded. I'm worried what would happen if my parents happened to find out. Not that I'm gonna tell them, but still, I'm really scared. I'd feel bad keeping this from them if it's really serious. I don't know what to do. I need to cry. My stomach hurts. I just feel all kinds of wrong.

18+ people with this thread please. I just want some advice from people who have experienced this. Its been almost 2 years since my real event and i can confidently say that i feel a bit better about that and my thoughts. (We still have bad moments but we recover.) but, ever since then and before, i feel nasty and gross whenever i engage or interact with adult content. Like this nasty guilt or feeling like i cant interact with it because then my ocd says “this proves that your thoughts are true and your perverse” and after i always feel empty and disgusting. Besides things like that, i read adult fan fiction sometimes or even write stories for my original characters. And yesterday i shared these stories with a close in person friend of mine. (Were both in college) and they were fine about it we laughed about it but then after i felt guilty-my brain was telling me “you traumatized her she just doesn’t wanna tell you” obliviously this isn’t true but im having a hard time believing it and this morning i woke up with a deep dread that i hurt a friend and im horrible. I can say that they’re more positive about these things then me and i think thats why we got into the conversation and i felt comfortable to share these stories but i just can’t get over it. I have a strong urge to ask for reassurance but i know it wont help. I literally have no one else to talk to about this. Ive spoken to my therapist about this guilt with adult content and we have yet to expand on it especially how it goes hand in hand with my asexuality. My therapist tells me its human to feel things like this and its ok to perform self care like that and again-im a human person its usually normal for 19 year olds to be like this especially for someone my age but i dont feel normal. I feel nasty. Does anyone else feel this way? How did you confront this guilt and how did you feel comfortable again interacting with these feelings and actions again? I dont really have a desire to do s*xual things often (im on the asexual spectrum) but when i do i dont want to feel like this. Especially when my ocd types effect it. Advice is needed and appreciated thank you for your help.