- Username
- Mars
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Been there bro. Same theme and everything. It sucks a lot, and it’s going to happen again, and again. I’m not gonna lie about it. But I will tell you each time makes you stronger, and eventually you’ll be so tired of being triggered you won’t care anymore. You’ll make it.
Thank you, my big fear now is just getting in trouble but I didn’t say anything legally incriminating I think?? So I’m just kinda like sitting here being scared and trying to just do things despite that fear.
@Mars I’ve worried similarly. However, mine was about something that I saw that luckily ended up being legal, yet I had convinced myself the actress in the concerned matter was not in fact 23. I knew she was (she was verified) Yet, At the time however, the doubt was so strong, even though I knew I was fine. I posted on reddit and other ocd forums about it. I got countless comments telling me I, just like you, had a problem. The problem does not concern the legality, but instead the anxiety. You and I are fine. I can tell both of us that, but in the long run, it won’t help will it? Reassurance, whether from ourselves or others will not help in the long run. I spoke w 4 lawyers online because I was worried. In the end, it came down to time, and of course avoiding triggers, yet exposing myself properly with the help of a professional to my obsessions.
@johnd1197 Yeah... ocd is such a terrible disease. Honestly sometimes I fear I’ll never get better. I’ll be starting some basic erp with my therapist soon but it hasn’t started yet so I’m still in a terrified limbo all the time...
Let yourself feel the anxiety. Name the sensations: tightness, fluttering, hot, achey, etc. and breath. Let the sensations exist and leave on their own. There is nothing else to do right now. Unfortunately, when we turn to resources that don’t have someone trained in OCD with mental compulsions, we often get ineffective or even triggering results. Talking with an OCD trained specialist would be much more helpful, but I understand that we don’t always have access to one when we need them. Right now, focus on calming down and being kind to yourself. Later, sit down and work out how you’re going to create and tackle a treatment plan including ERP. This story may end up serving as a great ERP scripts eventually.
I’m trying to calm down rn and be calm to myself- I’m mainly just afraid rn of getting into trouble because of the horror stories I’ve heard of people with ocd being misunderstood. I’m gonna be starting ERP with my therapist soon and I see her on Friday but I need to make it to then.
I've been there! Breathe in and out. What's going on?
The woman on the crisis hotline sent me this link that was a website about stopping sexual child abuse and to get help for sexual predators. It triggered me so bad after I told her MULTIPLE TIMES I have OCD and I’m SCARED of it.
She made me feel way worse and now I’m fearing even more and I don’t wanna say anything triggering but it makes me want to disappear more than I did before.
@Mars She obviously just isn’t educated on OCD and was probably confused! I think we would all be told something we didn’t wanna hear if all of us with ocd told our fears to someone who didn’t have a clue! Try not to overthink it, we are all here for eachother
@Beebuh I’m just scared I’m gonna get in trouble now that the police will come knocking on my door or the fbi having me on a watch list. I have a whole day to get through before therapy and I’m scared. I’m also scared her sending me that link just verified it’s true.
@Mars Was it anonymous?
@Connie101 She had my first name, and I’m not sure if it gives them my phone number but that’s all she had.
@Mars On a legal stand point you didn't do anything. They is no reason why they should come after you
@Connie101 I told her about my POCD, and like I confessed to things that made me scared as to why I was scared i might be a predator and I’m scared like what if she took that and thought it meant like really bad things did happen? That’s the scary part.
This is why I hate when people make OCD seem like a trait that makes you want to organized and clean. Oh jeez, take a moment to breathe in and out slowly. One thing that that my Therapist told me to do that really helped me. Was too Acknowledge its present and move on. Like "hi thought, bye thought"
I’m gonna try and do that- I feel so bad like I want to cry. I felt so alone and isolated and that’s why I went to the crisis hotline and ended up feeling even more alone and isolated.
@Mars Some of these people on these hotlines don't know the whole Spectrum of Mental Health. Which is okay, but they need not to cast judgment. You feel me? Before I got Diagnosed with OCD, I talked to someone About my thoughts. And you he was like "oh no you need serious help. Like thats normal" .
@Connie101 Before I got diagnosed with ocd at 18 (I’m 23) my therapist at the time pulled out the dsm and showed me the thing for pedophilia and I remember it triggering me so bad- she asked if it sounded like me. She also refused to listen to me when I said I think I have more than depression and anxiety. So yeah like... people not understanding ocd makes me so scared.
@Connie101 So you're not alone I understand how you feel. Completely! It sucks when you want help but you get judgement. But right we have a no judgment zone here. And you are free. To express yourself. In therapy what are some things you practice to get through episodes like this?
@Connie101 So far the most I’ve been taught is talk to yourself like you would a friend. Other than that I haven’t been taught much yet (we only had 3 meetings so far) but I’m gonna be asking her to find ways I can use to fight this on my own bc I know my friends get frustrated when they can’t help me- and I can’t rely on others 24/7 so I definitely need to find more coping skills.
@Mars Of course! I have some tricks that helped me if you wanna try? Lay on you back in a dark room put you hands on your tummy then deep breathe in and slow breath out. Allow yourself to feel the movement of your tummy going up and down and allow yourself to feel your lungs being filled with air.When a thought comes by Try that hi and bye method. But don't stop breathing
@Connie101 Thank you, I definitely will try that one. I’m always up for hearing more coping skills because I really wanna beat ocd.
@Mars And we will! One day at a time! You got this. Also let me know how that works for you okay?
@Connie101 Thank you so much, I definitely will. I’m also gonna try and interact with friends despite how afraid I am to. Once again thank you for your help <3
@Mars That's great! You're welcome!
Breathe into it
I’m so sorry you had to go through that! OCD is way more complex than people think it is (most thing you just wash yourself hands a lot and organize). Most people won’t understand but that’s their own fault. In my case I deal with suicidal OCD so I absolutely hate it if I’m talking about it or asking for help and I’m getting warnings to call a suicidal hotline or whatever when I’m NOT suicidal! It’s the OCD! I’m also sorry you had to deal with a therapist that wasn’t aware of OCD either. Back to your current situation, just breathe. Focus on your breathes and how your body is feeling in that moment, let the fear slowly slip off. It’s awesome that you will be starting ERP soon, so in the meanwhile be gentle with yourself, so things you enjoy like watch your favorite show or an activity, and when the OCD tries to strike at you remember to deep breathe and let the thoughts flow right off of you, show them they’re not the boss here. I hope you feel better and good luck with your ERP! It helps so much ?
Had some serious relapse this weekend and feel so embarrassed. Idk what to do and no matter how much I try to do ERP I feel like I’m always doing it wrong. I want to die or hide. I feel like I’m nothing but a burden to people.
Guys... I didn't know I would post again so soon. I'm extremely sorry but I can't stop crying and I think I'll explode from whatever I'm feeling. I thought I was a bit better especially with the kind help I received from my last post, which, again, I'm really thankful for. I was ready to go to bed when a memory from last summer resurfaced. It has always been at the back of my mind but I've always tried to ignore it by telling myself that I didn't do anything bad, but now it has resurfaced with full power. I don't think I'm ready to share it here because it's so disgusting but it's related to POCD. I think I will need to confess it to my therapist tomorrow when I see her but I'm so scared. I'm scared she will have me sent to jail. I'm not asking for advice. I just wanted to talk to someone because I feel so, so lonely. (But then, at the same time, I feel like I don't want to talk to anyone because of how bad it is; I'm sorry, I'm so weird.) I'm sorry, I don't know what to say anymore. And I know I sound so dramatic but I promise that's not my intention.
Tw: suicide but please help if you can . . . . . . Today I was accidentally exposed to something waaaaay too high up my hierarchy and I cant handle it. I'm at the point of planning suicide. I've come up with a new plan and I really feel like it would spare me the pain of ocd and my fear playing out. I was already on a crisis line today but cant share the urge to hurt myself. The crisis worker tried to help me but I honestly felt like I was just wasting their time and they could have been helping someone else so I said I was fine and got off the line. I'm not, I cant stop this overwhelming urge. I know we are supposed to sit with discomfort but this one is a lot. I keep imagining different ways to hurt myself and I'm itching to do them.
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