hi! simple question, has anyone stopped doing things they liked due to their ocd? for example, i used to run a fan account for one of my fav groups but due to hocd, i went on hiatus and now i’m kinda anxious to go back even though most of my internet friends will be there to support me! like, part of me wants go back but i’m also anxious ?

i have been struggling with HOCD (or at least what i think is HOCD) for a few months now. it has gotten okay at least when i’m distracted but lately it has flared up a lot. it makes everything feel so heavy and like i can’t even enjoy anything anymore. it is to the point i don’t even know if this is HOCD. i try to say “maybe yes, maybe not” or not engage but i feel like it’s not working. there isn’t an obvious compulsion either which makes me feel like i am just in denial. i get afraid that people perceive me as gay and get especially uncomfortable around gay people, which sounds homophobic but i just get afraid that they also think i’m gay it is even making me think that maybe i knew i am gay my whole life and i just don’t want to admit it to myself. but the idea of even being gay makes me so uncomfortable and anxious because i have only ever imagined being with or been attracted to men since before my OCD got really bad. i even will look at pictures of attractive men and even if i find them attractive i feel this decreased sense since my brain is questioning if i really am attracted or if i am convincing myself that i am. i can’t tell the difference anymore and it’s so distressing. i feel like i can’t enjoy anything and don’t know how to treat this. i want to do ERP but i hate even talking about it and i know they won’t judge me but i don’t even know what i would do anymore

Hello, I've used this app before but sometimes avoid to not remind myself that I do have ocd. So acouple of months ago there was an upsetting video that circuled around the internet and I deleted my tiktok and instagram to avoid it. I've been using ig only on other people's phones because it just feels safer. Safe to safe just the description of this particular video left me traumatized and my ocd "flares up" when I have PMS. For me, I'm scared of being on ig because I get scared I'm gonna see or hear about that video or even worse, look up the particular things to "make sure" its deleted off of the internet. I know I would never put myself to witness something so awful, but the idea of me even thinking about it is enough to scare me and makes the simplicity of enjoying ig kinda nerve-wracking and I wonder if anyone on this app understands this feeling and knows ways to use social media in a peaceful way. I would really appreciate advice and thank you a lot to anyone who took the time to read this! Thank you 😊

for the last several months, OCD has had an absolute chokehold on my career as a self employed artist. Just constant new subtypes and intrusive thoughts popping up one right after the other, all boiling down to the fear of me potentially losing my career. I'm not currently in therapy (nOCD does not take my insurance) but currently waiting to hear back from a therapist and OCD specialist while taking advice from OCD resources in the meantime. I've been doing everything I possibly can to keep my life going and working through my OCD, but it is so exhausting. I'll be working on a project and when intrusive thoughts pop into my head, I do my best to do some self ERP and tell myself the usual "well, maybe!", or "oh well!" ect, ect. but the anxiety will still linger and i will experience such extreme anxiety symptoms like sweating, dizziness, disassociation, and nausea to the point i will start gagging while I'm still trying to get my work done. It's become physically debilitating to deal with, it takes so much longer for me to finish work, and I don't even enjoy what I've created once it's done. I decided in a few weeks I'm going to take a short hiatus from my art account, so I can take a break from having to deal with the constant physical symptoms ontop of dealing with social media/algorithms which have also been frustrating me. I even plan to wipe my page so I can come back to a clean slate when I decide I'm ready to post again. But now my OCD has taken a hold of me wanting to take a step back. 'What if you don't recover when you come back?' 'What are you hiding/running from?' 'Maybe OCD is just telling you to take a break?' I am so tired lol. I don't know what the right choice is for me right now. But I do want to take a step back from work to work on my mental and physical health. So I think I'm at least going to listen to what my body and brain needs. if anyone has some advice or words of encouragement (not reassurance) pleaaase drop it here bc I'm gunna need it!!