- Username
- coolghoul44
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I am so sorry. I work at a college too and we are going to have to go in soon as well. I feel your fear and I dont know how to help because I'm also in that situation. I'm hoping a doctor can wrote me a note for mental health purposes.
* UPDATE * Had my first day back at work yesterday. I started having obsessive thoughts about everything being contaminated. I did a lot of cleaning and tbh cried a lot. I wound up leaving early because I felt so physically sick, but I did it. I spent 6 hours at my office so I'm counting it as a "win". I still don't think any colleges should be in-person right now and I still have INTENSE anxiety about going back, but I'm doing everything I can to stay safe and keep my job.
👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 🌟🌟🌟 💜💜💜 Seriously, so proud of you! Continuing to send you strength.
@ARTnotOCD Thank you so much, I appreciate it! 💖
@coolghoul44 Also, my puppers is cuddled up asleep in my arm, so naturally I’m just stuck here. He’s dreaming real hard to send you extra lovins anytime you need them, especially at work. 💜🐶🧡
That's so wonderful! Does your management know that you suffer with this?
No, they don't. I don't have an official diagnosis yet. I've been expressing my severe anxiety about going back to campus for months to HR and my supervisor. I called HR on Friday and explained to them that I experience a lot of the symptoms listed under COVID daily (headaches, GI upset, muscle pain). I said that I've been experiencing it before COVID and how I'm working with my doctors to figure out the underlying cause/problem. Do whatever is safest for you.
And they still had you come back? I'm an administrator at a college and they are keeping us at home to keep the staff who NEED to be on campus safe. They need us to go in and pack up for a move but that's all for now. Are you essential on campus?
@catattak Yes, I'm considered an essential worker as of last week. I work in sexual violence prevention and we had students return to campus last Friday. But it doesn't make sense because I don't have the space to meet with students in my office and I can't do any in-person programming. I specifically had HR clarify that everything should continue to be on Zoom. For your move, maybe try going at an off-time? Either super early or super late. That way you'll interact with the least amount of people possible.
@coolghoul44 We will be scheduled but I have a biopsy in a few weeks I cant get sick before. So I'm going to try and reason with my ED and say I cant come in before then but will go in on a weekend when no one is there. I'm sorry you're back but I am glad for zoom as opposed to in person meetings. This is probably some amazing ERP as much as you can handle and I think your anxiety will lessen as you are out
Going in on the weekend sounds like a great idea! I did that 3 weeks before I returned to work to grab something from my office. It was very helpful because I went on my own terms and I was able to handle the anxiety by myself without people being around! Def ask for that! And yes, I agree with you! It'll be good ERP haha I wish you luck on your biopsy!
I wish I had some real suggestions. I don’t know if you’d wanna try any accommodations through ADA. (I usually disclose my OCD as a student, but not as an employee.). Keep doing what you know are the suggested precautions in the meantime. If you like dogs, can I send you some puppy snuggles to ease your anxiety at all? Best wishes!
I don't know if I can get accommodations through the ADA because I don't have an ~official diagnosis yet. I bought cute masks to help me feel better and I have other supplies too. It's the physical anxiety and obsessive thoughts that I'm struggling with. Following the precautions may be the only thing I can do right now to keep my job. I love dogs! I would love to see pictures! 🐶
@coolghoul44 Is there a way to share pics here? I’ll describe him: he’s a rescue, so we’re not sure of anything, but he seems like a Jack Russell and Brittany mix. He’s mostly white with orange spots. The Russell in him makes him have a large rib cage and that full-body wag. It also means he sometimes just walks across the room on only his hind legs or do other circus tricks for no reason. The Brittany in him keeps his hair so soft and his tail very floofy. He has one brown eye and one half-brown, half-blue eye. He’s also very good for helping me through anxiety and is learning to even respond to help me stop picking or do other compulsions.
@ARTnotOCD He sends snuggles whenever you need them!
@ARTnotOCD HE SOUNDS SO CUTE!! Thank you!! ♡
how do you all deal with going to work while having ocd? i have to go to work tomorrow for the first time in a while and i’ve been obsessing really bad the past couple of weeks. i’m scared i won’t actually be able to function or anything because all i’ve been doing every day all day has been obsessing. i’m really nervous. any advice will be appreciated.
I only recently was diagnosed with OCD and have started my journey which I am proud of, but am struggling with finding balance because of the dissonance between my work responsibilities and ERP. I have been attracted to the career I am in because I care about doing right by others, and I have a passion for helping leaders create a healthy environment for the people on their teams. I also of course like clear expectations, writing and following rules, so educating on policies and procedures is a strong suit. Unfortunately, I am just recently learning that a big theme for my OCD includes moral scrupulosity and it has opened my eyes to see why I have struggled so much mentally the past year. I work in HR as a team relations specialist which means I make recommendations on how managers should address issues with their teams, i investigate employee concerns or allegations, and also advocate for team members when they are being treated unfairly. Additionally my job involves doing nonstop documentation of the content of every call we have, every email received and sent to us etc. we then have to save them as files and write notes summarizing each file or piece of correspondence and key information from it. (There is very much the mindset of there being no such thing as too much documentation at my company) I have noticed that since taking this job a little over a year ago, I have not been ok. I love the work I do and the good moments where I feel like I helped someone. I also love that the company and managers put so much weight on doing the right things, but the expectations put on those of us in the roles also feeds my OCD and reinforces my compulsions like getting reassurance that my thinking is right, ruminating, or checking and rechecking. It also gives strength to the arguments OCD makes to me about needing to analyze excessively to make sure I am not missing anything, or that I am not mistakenly engaging in cognitive biases and factoring them into my recommendations. Since I have a large influence over how situations with team members are handled my OCD emphasizes this and convinces me that if I do not do my job adequately or make a compelling argument, I am doing a disservice to the team members I support.....but so does the HR leadership at the company. It is consistently emphasized that we are expected to be the ultimate moral voice in every circumstances and that we are responsible for remaining 100% objective in guiding leaders on what to do to ensure all risks are assessed, taken into account and avoided in addition to us making sure leaders are doing right by their teams. Many of the others in my role like myself also keep spreadsheets during investigations we conduct that documents all perspectives in situations of people we interviewed, track definitive evidence, and analyze all factors/ devils advocate arguments to ensure appropriate steps are taken to address and that every situation is handled fairly. I'm finding that even though I tend to be behind on work because of my just right struggles with documenting and investigations, I am seen as a star performer in my role because I am hyper-empathetic, scrupulous, and risk aversive. Unfortunately, those same qualities makes my OCD obsessions and compulsions stronger. Not sure if there is anything I can really do at this point because finding a new job isn't an option right now, I just needed to get this off my chest and see if anyone has experienced similar where they found themselves in a spot where their work responsibilities were at odds with their recovery or made it more challenging to use ERP tools.
I’m here because I’m looking for help. I’ve tried CBT but my therapist isn’t specialized in OCD and I don’t know what else to do. I’m terrified all the time, I wear a mask every day and wash my hands till they are raw. I don’t know what to do, I didn’t have anywhere near the levels of anxiety and depression before the pandemic that I have since the pandemic started, I am terrified of everything, I had Covid once but I am terrified that I’m a ticking time bomb because it does cause long lasting symptoms and can disable or kill you even after one infection and that’s what terrifies me. I’m forced to go into the office with people who don’t mask and don’t care about coughing up a lung and not covering it up. I can’t sleep without feeling like something is wrong with my heart or my body and I am constantly afraid of going out and being around people and crowds. I’m terrified of Covid and getting it again and losing my life and quality of life because of it. I’m also terrified of losing my wife because she doesn’t want a partner who just stays in the house all the time.
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