zeep
- Date posted
- 5y
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 5y
Hey you’re not alone! I’ve had random thoughts about “what if I’m gay” before they just never bothered me like they do now because I never gave it importance since my sexuality was never something I needed certainty of. My brain loves to bring it up as proof I’m gay. Just like @reliablereader says^ there’s a lot of girls who are okay with the possibility that they might be attracted to women on some level - that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are gay. I used to say I would gladly marry Jlo and other female celebrities I loved even though I considered myself straight and didn’t actually feel sexually attracted to them and I never thought twice about it before. I hope one day we can all just accept that we will never know and move on with our lives.
zeepzeep
- Date posted
- 5y
i wish i could just not worry about this kind of thing, it’s so annoying haha!!thank you so much :)
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
@zeep We probably should tell ourselves that there are worse things that could happen in life than ending up with JLo 😂🙈 But of course that OCD is not that easy to handle..
val ʚĭɞval ʚĭɞ
- Date posted
- 5y
omg thats me w shakira because.. have y’all seen her? she’s gorgeous and her hips certainly don’t lie hahaha
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 5y
@val ʚĭɞ HAHA same I love shakira and jlo now I’m thinking that super bowl would be a good exposure for us
GabyGaby
- Date posted
- 5y
@reliablereader That’s true hahaa I don’t know why we’re so terrified that we’ll be into a woman one day when it’s best to just live in the moment in today!
Clementine Clementine
- Date posted
- 5y
I have. About a year ago I had a couple days where all I thought about was my sexuality and a couple times after that they’ve come into my head but I just assumed they weren’t true. I feel like they are true though but I just don’t want them to be
zeepzeep
- Date posted
- 5y
omg thank you i felt so alone:( i remember always not liking the ideas, but never to this extent with intrusive thoughts and ruminating.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 5y
I don't want to give you reassurance but before I got into this terrible cycle of doubt, fear amd compulsion, I used to get fleeting thoughts about not being 100% straight without really being bothered by it. Sexuality is fluid and I know a lot of girls in happy straight relationships who find themselves attracted on some level to females (e.g. celebrity girl crushes or admiring a teacher at.). It could mean that they are not 100% straight or it could mean nothing at all, I think it depends on how you want to view it and how you want to live your life. The difference is that now my mind seems not to be able anymore to accept ambivalence anymore and urges me to be 100% sure that I will never ever fall in love with a woman and that if I cannot be totally sure about that then I have to blow up my relationship with my boyfriend with whom I have been with for over a decade. It really sucks, but I guess all we can do is embrace the uncertainty and go on with what makes us happy 💗
zeepzeep
- Date posted
- 5y
thank you so much for your response! i relate to needing to be 100% sure ugh . thank you for saying that, i hadn’t really heard that before but that makes sense and it helped me feel much better :)
val ʚĭɞval ʚĭɞ
- Date posted
- 5y
hi!! i had these sort of thoughts when i was around 12 and i even thought i liked a girl but in reality it was just a friend crush! i even told her that i ‘liked’ her but that same day i called things off because i didn’t feel the same way that i felt about boys. like i just ddint see myself being romantically/sexually involved w a girl like i would w a guy. before and after all my crushes had been boys and well:// thanks to that event i had when i was younger it triggered my hocd but i’m feeling a whole lot better:) it was just curiosity and i ddint like the experience
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g_rangel
- Date posted
- 24w
spiraling again.
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Chlem11
- Date posted
- 14w
Sexual Orientation OCD
I have a lot of trouble with my sexuality. I’ve been trying to figure out my sexuality for years. I’ve dated a man, and I wasn’t really into the whole time. And since then I’ve thought that maybe I’m a lesbian because I’m attracted to women, which I know for sure. But then my brain spirals, I constantly think back ti memories with my ex, how I felt with him, I check how it makes me feel. I often google to see if other lesbians have felt similar, I ask ChatGpt over and over again. I feel like I have to be 100% certain or that im faking for attention, or thst I’ll end up with a man. I guess im wondering has anyone else felt like this ? What’s been your experience how do you manage it?
evasprog
- Date posted
- 13w
New sort of intrusive thought
Hello, so I’ve been struggling really badly with so-ocd where I am worried that I’m not actually straight when that’s what I’ve always thought and wanted to be. I’ve been with my boyfriend for about 2.5 years now, he’s my first boyfriend and I really love him so much and want to spend the rest of my life with him. I remember one time, before I had struggles with so-ocd, I had a thought along the lines of ‘what if I’m missing out on other men by staying with him’ and it didn’t really cause any anxiety but I felt quite guilty for thinking that. But I moved on. However, right now I’m in the depths of so-ocd it started back in March I believe, and today I had a thought along the lines of ‘what if I never get the opportunity to try being with a woman because I’m in a relationship with a man’ and that has really set me off today. I’ve had a meltdown over it, my chest feels heavy and it felt so real like I actually wanted it and I had a feeling of wanting to be gay even though that’s not what I want in life. Why is this happening to me and I feel so horrible for thinking this like it felt like it was me and not the ocd and that I’m just lying to myself and my boyfriend. I’ve tried scrolling on here to see if anyone has had a similar thought or experience and I am aware that this is reassurance seeking but I just need someone to tell me that I’m okay
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