Who else on here has contamination OCD it would be awesome to talk to others in the same boat

Hey there! That sounds scary and really tough to deal with. Though mine isnt emotional contamination, I definitely can see what you are saying with friends and family getting contaminated and fearing the trail of contamination. Can I ask what you think will happen to you if you get contaminated either by that girl or by a friend who was around that girl?

@benno Hey, did you get better? I have this type of contamination ocd, but towards my family.

Haha funny finding you here 🤗🤗

@bonjess Haha I know right! But they never picked me.

@catattak That's ok , I always will . Your my reality checker. And ' Follow the CDC Guidelines' reminder 😎

@bonjess Ohhhhh I need that reminder lately. I dont even know why. I'm probably not being diligent enough. Washing my ha ds way to often! Gotta pull back on those reigns. How have you been doing?

@catattak Bit of a bad day . Silly really when I think of it but I have a door handle I hang bin bags on before they go out . I don't touch this handle at all as I think of it as contaminated from the bin handles I tie up with dirty gloves. Anyway today I was taking the washing out the machine and when I walked past the door I convinced myself that the shirt I was holding on to touched it . I said no be strong and I put it on the rest of the pile of washing and started to hang it all up. Well them my ocd started , I couldn't handle thinking I was spreading the contamination everywhere. I thru out the shirt then started to back track on the other clothes it touched . I thru out a whole bag but I'm still not happy and think the remainder of the clothes are infected to ... Ahhhh ... I've just run out of washing powder to so I can't re wash them . Shopping comes tomorrow but still won't touch that straight away . Now I have the clothes staring at me , and the racks that will have to be cleaned to ... Wish my head wasnt like this .. Going to give myself a good talking to when I go to bed and hopefully wake up stronger

@bonjess Oh my gosh! I'm really sorry. I'm also flat out impressed you can just throw out clothes?? What if you loved that shirt? Anyway, I had a similar situation but did manage to keep strong. I went to my basement to grab a pop that was on the bottom shelf of this rack.i use to store groceries. We keep new groceries on the top two shelves so the cats cant reach them. I was convinced when I bent over my hair touched the 2 day old groceries. I really had to distract t myself. I definitely did avoidance of touching my hair and slept very oddly to not touch my face to certain parts of my pillow but now that I've woken up I feel better. And today is the third day. I hate the concept that we convince ourselves something happened when it likely didnt. I'm curious why you throw out clothing rather than wash it.

Oh boy. I'm so sorry you struggle with that. Is it something you're working toward overcoming?

@catattak I do try but really regret trying like tonight it would have been so easy to just chuck it out , Now I have to deal with losing a heap of clothes and now the ones left have to be cleaned again and cleaning the drying racks which will prob never be clean enough again

@bonjess That's really tough. I thought I typed this out but maybe I didnt send? Sorry if this is a duplicate idea. Is there a way for you to store clothing until you can wash it? I totally understand the need for small steps here. My husband doesnt understand why I need small steps and it's really just because being overwhelmed sends me back in my progress. If I get too scared, I will retreat. So I would imagine it's similar for you. Are there small steps you can take that would help you toward your goal?

@catattak I was hoping for small steps but I just feel like I'm ready to give up.. What is the point of being strong to get knocked right down. If I just chucked that one piece out then i could have avoided all this. I woke up worse , I'm at the stage now that I'm about to chuck out the rest of the clothes and get rid of the dryers . I don't see the point of being strong and keeping anything just for it to turn around and hit me harder later . Sorry I'm just in a really bad place . Don't have anyone to talk to or support me , no reality checker for me . It's really hard . My partner doesn't live with me at the moment, he doesn't believe in the covid , says it's all a conspiracy , so he's never isolated just done everything like normal. If I try to talk to him he just tells me to shut up the whole thing isn't real and stop being a sheep ..

@bonjess I'm really sorry. I dont want to give reassurance but truly it doesnt need to he thrown away. Nothing does. Covid is very susceptible to soap which breaks down the lipid layer that holds the spikes together. To me that's actually like the one good thing about all of this. We CAN protect our physical belongings. But you do need to find small steps because being overwhelmed is too much to manage. Maybe a good ERP would be when you have more wash powder, specifically touch a piece of clothing to the bin handle and then put it in the wash. Here's a video on how soap dismantles the virus. Once the outer layer of the virus is broken, it's no longer viable because the virus has no spikes to cling to tissue. Visuals help me a lot. https://youtu.be/zRjkhjc8CjM

@catattak Thank you for the reply. I don't actually worry about the covid on the for handle. It's more that I clean the toilet with wipes etc , then they go in the bag and I tie it up . So it's more of a toilet thing. If i think covid touches anything then I leave the clothes for a week then wash them. I did give in today though , I've thrown all the clothes out and the dryers put away too . I just couldn't handle it.. It's really put my thinking backwards at the moment , I am just not fighting anything anymore , easier to give in . Sad day 😢

@bonjess Oh I'm sorry :( I dont have much reality check for the toilets. I grew up on a farm so not much in the way of bacteria gets to me. My trouble is viruses. Like I'll eat dirty fruits and veggies out of the garden, but have always been scared of people who are possibly contagious. To me a toilet is my own germs. It's still yucky dont get me wrong, but it's not going to hurt me because those were my germs to begin with.

@catattak I grew up around horses and farms to. Nothing used to bother me , used to get in trouble for eating lunch without washing hands , picking up horse poo with no gloves, hoping in the water troughs on hot days . Ahh the good old days..... I like your comment about toilet being your own gems , i guess in my head they turned into monsters and grew

@bonjess Oh that's really cool! My husband washes all the veggies that come out of the garden and asks me to as well. He doesnt have ocd but he was a city boy. I have to fight the simple urge to do it for him so that I keep up my mental tolerance to just brush the dirt off and go. I think I will start to fear it if i dont. I get what you are saying thinking bacteria grows into a scary monster. Think of it this way, if it were going to grow and mutate, it would have done it in your body where its warm and moist. Bacteria multiplies in warm, wet environments. Your toilet isnt sterile, but it's not a petree dish either. Not fun, but not dangerous. Especially if you are living on your own. That's of course waaaaaaay easier said than done, I get that but maybe a bit of a different perspective to help you cringe a little less :)

@bonjess Also I meant to go on about the horse farm. Can you journal about it and really explore times when you were really getting dirty? I know your thought there is "well I had built a great immune system then!" But that's the thing, you built it. Maybe remembering those times would help give bolster your confidence a bit.

@catattak That's a good point, I do try and think about the old days . I used to be so carefree and was hardly ever sick . I have to keep reminding myself this . Now if we just get rid of this pandemic them I can work on it again with no real threat but my ocd bully 😊

@bonjess Gosh I know! I keep having conversations with myself that I cant even get regular sick because I dont want to think it might he covid and isolate myself all over a cold. It's a real kick in the shin

I get what you are saying. I thought I posted this last night but it's not here. I see unkempt people and get a bit....not grossed out, but definitely hesitant to maybe shake their hand. I just really have to wash my hands after something like that.