Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I just did an exposure (post something on social media) and now I have to do the response prevention part (not checking social media for comments and likes) I have done this erp exercise before but the urge to check seems stronger this time. 😑 But I have to do this for myself and my children whom I love.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

Thanks for the three of you who checked in and encouraged me. I have not done the compulsion yet. 🙂 I have been anxious today but I am proud that I have been able to resist compulsions multiple times today. I am hopeful that I am on my way to master the skill of not over reacting to ocd thoughts.

Learning

Date posted: 5y

I'm a Mom of three also, with all the kinds of OCD, for most of my life, but this one scares me the most. It's terrifying. I'm glad to talk to some other Mom's about it!

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

What type do you have? Pocd?

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

What is your theme?

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I have had many different themes but for now my themes are mainly religious, safety around my children, and what people think of me.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Sunflower 1234 The safety and well being of my children

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

@Sunflower 1234 I can relate. I think we’ve talked before about this actually. But yes, I can relate! If you don’t mind me asking, how is posting on social media an exposure for you? And good work! You got this!

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Freemeofocd Because of my OCD I usually over analyze people comments to my post. I would explain more but I don't want to trigger you. I remember talking to you too. Do you struggle with pocd?

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Freemeofocd Also thanks for the encouragement. I feel weak and vulnerable right now. But I am also stubborn and I don't want to let OCD win. 🙃

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

@Sunflower 1234 Yes I do struggle with that. Do you as well? If you don’t mind sharing, I would like to know. Maybe I can practice your ERP excercise as well. Are you in therapy? Or is this self-guided erp? How old are you? I’m sorry I’m just so excited when I find other moms like myself ❤️

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Freemeofocd I use loop tapes a lot, identify my compulsions and just do the opposite of what ocd tells me to do. I am happy to connect with other moms on here too.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I had pocd 10 years ago but I don't have it any more. I am 34 and I have 3 children. The oldest is 5. My OCD theme now is that people will use the pictures of my children I post on social media for bad purposes that is why I don't post pics of them on social media. I have other compulsions around this theme too. 😑 I don't have a therapist. I cannot find one so I have been doing therapy on my own.

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

I have struggled with that fear myself. Also the fear when my daughter goes to her fathers for his time with her. I always feel the need to inspect her once she gets home. I am 29, we are pretty close in age! Good job with practicing erp on your own. It is incredibly brave of you. Have you looked into NOCD therapy?

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Freemeofocd Wow I thought I was alone in this fear. I am always scared of people molesting my children too. I am doing this for my children. They need me to be strong. They are my motivations to get better. And the only way to get better is erp. I did schedule an appointment with a nocd therapist but he didn't show up. Turns out he is a fraud. 😑 You should seek nocd therapy if you can though. Other people on here have good experiences with them.

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

@Sunflower 1234 Oh yes! I remember you saying that happened. I’m so sorry. Did you ever get to speak to someone about that? Maybe they will reschedule you? Did you get your money back? I have an appointment with a therapist this month, and then also a NOCD therapist this month. I’m worried about opening up to a therapist that isn’t trained specifically in ocd.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

@Freemeofocd I didnt pay them anything yet. Nocd is really nice about it. That therapist just happens to be a fraud. They don't have any other therapists that are licensed to do therapy in my State I saw a none ocd therapist 12 years ago and it as a bad experience. They told me to stop thinking bad thoughts which made my OCD worse. So be careful to see a non OCD therapist.

Learning

Date posted: 5y

Really, most of them, but yeah, POCD, harm, counting and checking sometimes, scrupulosity, contamination I'm realizing, they tend to overlap a lot in my case.

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

Yes, same here! I deal with them all. How old are you and how old are your children?

Learning

Date posted: 5y

I'm 44, kids are teenagers and an elementary student.

Freemeofocd

Date posted: 5y

So glad I have other mothers on here that I can relate to ❤️ are you in therapy?

Learning

Date posted: 5y

I've done therapy forever, but not really ERP, just cognitive behavioral therapy with a therapist who works with OCD bit not a specialist. I'm realizing it might be time for something different.

Learning

Date posted: 5y

But that's super scary!

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I think erp is the most effective for ocd. I have started doing erp on my own for almost 4 weeks now and I have seen some progress. No where near recovered though. My OCD themes overlap too. So glad to have other moms here on this app. We have to get better for our children. Erp is scary but it does get easier. The first two weeks I did it were horrible. I was so depressed and hopeless. Now when I do erp I am still anxious but at least not hopeless

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I literally would die for my children. I feel like I am doing erp for them even though it is utterly so frightening. But I need to get better for them.

WhatATripp

Date posted: 5y

Hi, Sunflower! Jumping in late to the conversation. How did it go the rest of the day, not checking? As for being cautious with your kids' pics on social media, it's a wise choice. I am a facilitator for a curriculum on child sexual abuse prevention and intervention. One of the things participants learn is that protecting kids from this type of abuse should be as normal as protecting them from other things. Seat belts, bike helmets, no kid pics on social media...all normal things we do to protect our kids. And I think it's awesome that you're working through ERP on your own, too.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

I have not done my compulsion yet. Yay! Thanks for checking in. Would you mind explaining why it is bad to post kids pictures on social medial? What is the risk of that? I always post my kids pictures when they are fully clothes and only my friends can see the pictures. My OCD fear is that someone will steal my children pictures on Facebook and post them to a porn website. Is that a rational fear? My husband thinks my fear is irrational.

WhatATripp

Date posted: 5y

I see what happened in my post that concerned you and I apologize. I deleted part of a sentence... no kid pics on social media without privacy settings in place. With the right privacy settings, photos are pretty safe. If only your friends can see the pictures, that's good. There are creeps out there. You have a rational concern. The hard part is not allowing that to become an irrational obsession/fear. Trust the privacy settings you have to work. They've always worked for me :) Yes, it makes it very hard for your family and friends to share the pictures. That's the point. You can go to Darkness to Light's website. D2L.org. They have a lot of practical advice for parents. It's sensible without being frightening.

Meof3

Date posted: 5y

Thanks so much for clarifying. You are so thoughtful and kind. I will check out the website you suggested. Ocd is tricky sometime. It is hard to know when to draw the line. For example, it is good to wash your hands. But it can be an ocd thing to wash your hand for 10 hours. So I find it hard to know how much to protect my kids and not going overboard in an ocd way.

NotThatHardcore

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 22w

How are y'all challenging your OCD today?

Earlier today I did some pretty high-level contamination exposure, inspired by my therapist, and now I'm listening to a triggering song on repeat — the very song that kicked off my first serious bout of OCD in high school. There is a part of my brain that is telling me I can't handle the song and that I should find a compulsion to do, but my goal is to have it in the background while I go about my self-care tasks. I'm already starting to get used to it 💪 How are y'all challenging your OCD today?

Hobbit

Date posted: 20w

Not making ERP a compulsion?

Anyone have any tips on not making ERP a compulsion? I find myself sometimes wanting to do exposures in order to make myself feel better (feel my anxiety go down and feel relief). 😅

Anonymous

Date posted: 18w

Actually deciding to confront your fears head on.

Just noticed something that helped me today. I was having the realization a lot of my issues stem from me not taking responsibility for my own life, and also not recognizing my own self-limiting beliefs (SLBs) and automatic negative thoughts (ANTs.) In doing this, I learned that the only way forward is confronting my deepest darkest fears head on and associated irrational/self limiting beliefs- and that for years and years, I have simply retreated and run away. One of my deepest darkest fears (one of my obsessions) is rooted in the understandable fear of the worst of humanity, and the 'what if' I was that (like many of us.) I actually can have compassion for myself because it is perfectly okay to be scared of the worst of people, and if something like that is perpetuated throughout pop culture-media- it would make sense to have associated thoughts about it. The fear is that I am a serial killer or have motives of one. And the OCD has caused me to constantly question my motives and actions to no end (how OCD latches on- makes you look for evidence where there is none.) For the longest time, I have been convinced I am one, and need to hide myself from the world, avoid people more than just because of social anxiety, what my main anxiety was back then. I look for signs everywhere- and the OCD latches on to any perceived (not real) evidence that I am one, that people think I am one. When I decided to confront this fear rather than run away like I have for years, it made me realize it is just a fear- it has nothing to do about who I am as a person, despite how strong the OCD tries to convince you otherwise. It is so sad how strong OCD can be, to make so many of us good intending people be convinced that they are something horrible. Anyway, I hope this can help people realize the best way forward is to confront it head on. It's akin to shining a light on the monster and seeing it for what it is - a goofy thing with fake prosthetics for a movie that isn't a monster after all- a sheep in wolfs clothing. It's just you have been running from it so long, your imagination has gotten so detailed about how horrible it is, hearing its fake growls, instead of turning around and blasting it with a spotlight. This is I guess what ERP is about. For me, one of the struggles with ERP and a specific exposure is that the OCD will jump to a different obsession , which then tells me ERP is a waste because Im not confronting the 'most recent' fear. This is faulty thinking though- because the solution is to confront the fear, not the specific thought. By doing that, you learn to not run away and do all the compulsions in your mind. Tl;dr- long winded post about me realizing how I have actually been avoiding the solutions (ERP) and making up reasons to not confront my fears this whole time. I have been running instead of shining a light on the sheep in wolfs clothing.

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