- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Well first, definitely stop researching. And second, the past is just that. Past. No amount of parsing or ruminating can change it and no amount of evidence-seeking will leave you sure enough. So give yourself permission to stop trying to move on; move forward instead. The difference is in the power you allow mistakes to have on your life. It’s ok to not be ok. And I can say confidently that all themes look easier from the outside, but honestly, they all freaking suck =)
- Date posted
- 4y
I never wanted these mistakes to have power. Most of them were when I was in my teen years. I'm just so disgusted with the mistakes mainly. I don't want to give them power, I don't want to think about them, and I just want to accept that like all human beings everyone makes mistakes and no one is freaking perfect. I guess it's so hard to accept self forgiveness because of how different I am today compared to before. I also feel like uncertainty will mean only the worst things will happen to me and I'm the worst person ever. Fuck, I just don't know
- Date posted
- 4y
@BigGip09 Of course you don’t want to think about them. But it’s a core principle that the harder you fight to not think about it, the more you will. Having power over your past doesn’t mean just accepting your imperfections. OCD is fundamentally opposed to acceptance. Believe me, if it was that easy, we’d all have been cured by now. But instead, you have power over the thoughts by deciding not to do anything with them. Don’t try to block them out, don’t try to rationalize, and don’t mull them over. Just let them sit there. They will go away eventually. I know it sounds like the hardest thing in the world, and it’s definitely close, but you can do it.
- Date posted
- 4y
@sfgal88 What am I going to do? How long will this take? Are the thoughts really that serious? Am I supposed to just sit there and let the thoughts get to me even if I don't want them to? Is this what ERP is? Why me? I hate that we all have to go through this. I really do. It's so unfair
- Date posted
- 4y
I didn't think of it until now, but I think I also have a really bad case of unhealthy perfectionism. I'm so scared of doing anything that will cause a mistake because of the mistakes I'm recently ruminating over. I'm always uncertain about these mistakes but I want to be certain. Even when I feel like I am I'm not
- Date posted
- 4y
Comment deleted by user
- Date posted
- 4y
@Anonymous You're really nice. Thank you. Maybe loneliness is part of this feeling too
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s hellish. And unfair. Don’t focus on how long it will take. Just hold onto hope that it won’t always be this way. ERP is sitting with the discomfort and being ok. You can ignore the thoughts without trying to smother them. Say to yourself, “Ok, my brain is thinking about it. It’ll pass. And I’ll be ok still.” Find other things to think about, things that ground you. I promise you, the harder you try not to think them the stronger they get. And if you dive into the thoughts, you’ll ruminate endlessly to try and get them sorted. You’ll never feel sure enough, but that’s just the bad wiring we all live with. It’s hard, but you CAN do this.
- Date posted
- 4y
This is so difficult, it really is. There's different triggers that are around and some are stronger than others, but at the end of the day they feel so damn real. It feels like the second I think about it it's going to happen and I'm going to be punished for something. That's why the thoughts never fully go away. But maybe you're right I'm always thinking the thoughts and even if they really make me uncomfortable I do end up being okay. Maybe I have to keep this in mind or something
- Date posted
- 4y
I am on the same
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hi everyone, I’m new here, and I wanted to share my experience. I’ve been struggling for over a year now on obsessing over a mistake. And the rumination of the mistake I made has been overwhelming and exhausting in those two years. I feel like such a horrible person. At the time, I didn’t realize what I was doing would affect me so much. When I realized it was wrong, I just said I’ll never do it again, and I moved on. But then months later, I was reminded of what I did, and I felt like I did the worst thing in the world, and that my life will never be normal again. And ever since then, it’s been a constant thought. And it’s exhausting. I have been able to open up to my family and a close friend about it and their reactions were so nonchalant compared to what my brain has been telling me. They say it wasn’t even that bad, and that I shouldn’t be beating myself up. I tell them how badly I feel and they just act like it was nothing. I thought that would help, but my brain continues to tell me how horrible of a person I am and I obsess over this one mistake I made two years ago. I’ve learned from it, I’ve moved on, I’ve opened up about it, I’ve gotten reassurance, but yet it still eats at me. It’s constant some days. Where all I wanna do is lay down in a corner and never leave. I feel like my life will never be normal again and I’ll never experience happiness again. Whenever I smile or feel any type of joy my brain tells me to stop and reminds me that I’m a bad person and I don’t deserve to be happy. Even though everyone tells me what I did wasn’t even that bad. And that it doesn’t make me who I am. But guess it’s not enough and I’m really running out of options.
- Date posted
- 11w
Due to real event ocd and past mistakes? I’ve been actively trying to work on this and try to accept and not pay too much attention to it but the confession thing has been bugging me but I’m also trying to accept that I don’t need to confess every single mistake I’ve made and we’ve all made mistakes Recently I’ve been wanting to work on myself and be more positive but because of my real events in childhood, I feel like I can’t live a normal life or deserve a normal life.
- Date posted
- 11w
just wanted to see if others struggle with real event ocd really kicking their a**. i feel like my mind is a constant battleground of every mistake ive made and they feel so huge and life altering to me that it’s hard to continue going on in their wake. just wondering if anyone else feels this way too.
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