- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
This sounds like classic POCD! Your niece is obviously very important to you, and you’d never want to hurt her or traumatize her, so your OCD ruminates about exactly that. OCD targets those important things which is why they’re so impactful and often really difficult to shake. You should talk to a therapist specializing in OCD, or even start with attending one of the NOCD zoom talks for some ideas on how to help this anxiety! POCD is a very common theme so don’t feel alone or in any way bad for the thoughts OCD puts in your head, they do not define you
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes I’ve been dealing with this for about 3 years now and it’s the worst. It’s like I try to get over it and spend time with her but every time I try it feels like I’ve done something terrible. It’s a struggle
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey I struggle with something very very similar and knowing I’m not alone is very helpful. I love my niece very much I would never ever do anything to harm anyone so when the thoughts arise they scare me so much that I avoid certain people. I promise you are not alone. I go through this too and I’m undiagnosed as well. I hope one day I will get help. Stay strong!
- Date posted
- 4y
We will get better! I believe that. The journey is just hard. It’s just hard to move past it
- Date posted
- 4y
I agree ^! I don’t experience this specific theme- but like HelpSendPuppies said, the principles and the anxiety surrounding uncertainty and the unknown and the need to know urgently, sounds really familiar & just like OCD. if you have the resources to, I would definitely urge you to reach out for help with an OCD therapist! Whether it’s through here or not, it’s definitely something to look into even though I know it can be really scary and overwhelming. If not, there are a lot of videos on YouTube (Chrissy Hodges is great!!) and even accounts on Instagram that have helpful tips and ways you can try and do some self ERP and therapy work. And you always have us on this app to talk to! You are not alone, remember that. And your thoughts, no matter how scary they are, don’t define you. You’ll be okay I promise <3 sending strength
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s really scary because it feels like they won’t get it. I wish I got get therapy on here but their services are only available in the US and UK. I’m hoping talking on here will help me. thank you so much for reaching out
- Date posted
- 4y
@riiii I know, I understand that. but trust me; especially working w an OCD therapist, they have heard it all!!! And they will understand. It’s just rly important to work w someone who has experience w/specializes in OCD so you can get the right treatment. Where do you live? I would rly recommend looking into the YouTube videos, just be careful you don’t watch them for reassurance bc then that can be harmful for your OCD and fuel it more. And even on this app they have features where you can practice self ERP if you don’t have access to therapy atm <3
- Date posted
- 4y
and if u want to join, there is an app called Discord where some of us on here chat on for support outside of this app as well. Here’s the link if u ever wanna join and have more support ❣️ https://discord.gg/KhFa6WQ6
- Date posted
- 4y
This is great thank you so much!
- Date posted
- 4y
Hi! I would have to agree with what Angela said. I’ve dealt with this, and still do, so you’re definitely not alone. I know how disgusting it can make you feel, but it’s not you, it’s just your stupid OCD. I’m sorry you have to deal with this crappy form of OCD, but it’s nice to know that someone else experiences the same things that I do! This is my first time writing on here too - don’t be afraid to reach out! Remember, it’s not you, it’s just your stupid OCD 🙂
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s nice to know that I have someone who understands. This was very comforting thank you!
- Date posted
- 4y
hey there! it seems like because you’ve had such an abrupt onset, you suffer from ocd (though i am not a clinician and cant provide a proper diagnosis). most people dont wake up one random morning and realize that they’re pedophiles. because you’re also incredibly afraid of this possibly being a truth, and you’re constantly overthinking your actions, these definitely sound like ocd symptoms. i recommend starting erp on this app, and if it is not accessible to you, try and find someone who specializes in erp in your local area. ocd feeds off of fear and anxiety; you dont deserve to live another day like this!
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes you’re right. I’ve been dealing with this specific ocd for 2 years now in fact that’s how it started for me. I’m definitely going to look into the resources available and hope for the best. Thank you so much!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Hi, I’m new here!! I’m praying I don’t get judged for this. But, back in late May of 2022 ( literally right before I graduated high school), I added this one random girl from my school on Snapchat. She posted something about a graduation party , so I swiped up on her story basically saying how I can’t believe we’re almost graduated. She replied and we had a really short and simple conversation. The next day ( i believe) , we started talking a lot , and I just so happened to see her at the highschool when we were grabbing our graduation outfits and doing the rehearsal. When I saw her irl, I kinda got turned off ( I heard she was kinda crazy) , and on top of that , she was a little ugly irl. I remember seeing her Snapchat bio , and she was close friends with my female cousin ( a year younger than me) , who I happened to experiment sexually with when I was 10-11 years old. I remember going to work later that day and having sort of a lightbulb flick thought ( it wasn’t a good thought though) , what if my cousin told her about what happened when we were younger? So I started to kind of panic and immediately distanced myself from that girl. I also experimented sexually with one of my female friends when I was 10-11 , and from that day onwards, I’ve been pretty much living in paranoia and a little bit of guilt about someone finding out and my life being ruined . On top of that, It’s gotten worse to now sometimes I wonder if a girl I added off of quick add ( Snapchat) is underage even if they told me they were 18+ or had 18 and above in their bio, and I get so much guilt and anxiety about that. I even had a quick thought last February on what if I did something inappropriate with my younger cousin when I was 15-16 but I just can’t exactly remember when it happened , and it still eats me alive when I think about it, because I don’t know if it happened or not. I’m sorry for the long vent, I just wish I felt normal again. No matter how much I try to do things that old me used to do, life always feels “ off”. I always kept the top part about when I was younger a secret up until early (ish ) 2024, then I vented to one of my best friends and he told me that that’s a normal thing to do at a young age. Since then, I have told multiple friends and they all say they did similar stuff, but my brain just can’t accept that. Please help me, I quite literally overthink everything nowadays. 2021 was the last full year that I felt normal ( coincidentally, the best year of my life so far) . It’s not just about sexual related things either, sometimes I’ll wonder if I messed up something at work or hit a car while driving/hit someone and drove off. I just wanna live my life how I was supposed to live it after highschool ( carefree and happy) before whatever it is ( I think it’s ocd) hit me unexpectedly. Thanks to anyone who read this , I just needed to pour it out regardless of how negative I felt typing this, I hope someone can relate , because I feel so alone in my head at times.
- Date posted
- 20w
(20f) I have been dealing with severe OCD symptoms for as long as I can remember. I recently got diagnosed about a year ago, and even though I know that these thoughts are probably my ocd, I still cant shake them. Growing up I was always very sexually curious. I was sheltered from a lot of things, as I went to a private school and things like sexuality and sex were never talked about. I remember doing some weird sexual things growing up (never affecting another person), looking up taboo sexual things, etc. I always seemed to become aroused no matter what the situation was, even if I just saw someone getting changed. I have no recollection of being SA'd, so i'm wondering where this all came from? Was I just curious and wanted to experiment and try different things? Or am I really a pervert, pedophile, etc. I have all these thoughts racing through my head and it's killing me. Everything I did as a kid I look back on and am disgusted, as those don't align with my views at all today. I never thought growing up thinking these things were wrong, or actually realize what they were until I got older. I'd like to think it was just my curiosity, but i'm not sure. What if i'm in denial and actually do like these things? I just need to know if theres something wrong w me, I cant keep going on like this. Could really use some advice.
- Date posted
- 17w
Hey so a couple months ago (7-8) I remember being upset at my family member. Like she was talking too much while I was annoyed and remember wanting her to be quiet. I got an intrusive thought like a really bad image of doing something really bad to her, and my hand twitched to the side a little? Like it felt like I was about to?! And I remembered thinking "if I do this, I'll get in trouble". I got up and left to the bathroom and felt horrified! I was thinking "did I want to act out? Did the only reason I didn't act out was because of getting in trouble? If there was no consequences, would have I done it?! Does this mean this whole time I've been using OCD as an excuse?" I remember I couldn't sleep for 3 nights because of how bad the anxiety was, I was crying and I felt very guilty like I should turn myself in to a mental hospital. I couldn't eat for many days or be near her because of that thought and twitch I had! I'm worried it was an impulse or I actually wanted to hurt her. And even to this day I still ruminanate about this. Like last night I couldn't sleep well I kept waking up every two hours and asking myself "am I capable?" I couldn't eat last night. Sometimes I move on from it like I forget that happened but when I remember, I feel distressed about it! I don't want to be an evil person or do bad actions towards anyone! I'm even scared to be angry because of this because I'm scared I have more "chance" of acting out due to anger. Like was it an impulse and I held back? Is this even OCD? Please help, I'm really scared!
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