freaking out a bit. i just read about how narcissists really really idealise partners and then a few weeks in they see that person’s flaws and get turned off. and i literally do that. i don’t know why but i just get easily turned off guys because i fall for the idea of them. also, i’ve realised i don’t feel that close with my friends and maybe i don’t even love them. i know i love my family, so i don’t think i’m a narcissist. but why don’t i love my friends?? and i read narcissists always blame the other person (‘oh i just haven’t found my people yet!’ ‘oh, he’s just not the one for me’) and i guess i do that too. i try to be hopeful that the right people will come along. these two things have been making me so anxious though. it feels like proper proof that i can’t ignore!!!!

I can relate, sometimes I feel very apathetic and like I don’t love my friends. I have to remind myself that some sort of love is there, I just can’t see or feel it right now, like it’s hiding behind a wall. I know if my friends got hurt or left I would be upset. I believe love is always there, even if it’s small, we just can’t always feel or see it. I’m not trying to give you reassurance but the fact that you are worrying tells me you are a deeply empathetic person. Even if u aren’t worried in the moment you still have a heart and humanity. ❤️☮️ I hope you feel better soon

It's never a good idea to self-diagnose. Since you're here even asking about it I really doubt you're in that personality disorder cluster. It takes alot to actually be diagnosed in the b cluster branch. We all go meet people and in the beginning it's all great but the more you spend time with them the more you see how they really are. We're actually not really compatible with alot of people that we actually get a real connection with. And also, iono how long you've had these friends. But we all grow and find our own way in life and alot of times how you grow is not the same way they are taking. It's natural to lose connections to people you've been really close with cause of the sheer fact the situations and goals in life has changed. Hopefully this helps and make it a bit easier for your mind

I feel kinda like this too