- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Please, please listen to this - I can imagine how isolated you feel. OCD singles out humiliating moments in our lives and puts them on a pedestal and makes them so much more big and powerful than they would EVER need to be. I see that you glaze over the fact that you were a child, but that’s really, really important context. Children do all sorts of embarrassing things that most of us just block out or pretend never happened. I baby sit a lot of children, and you would be surprised at the sorts of things I see regularly, so please don’t think that this is a perverse or abhorrent thing because it’s just childhood behaviour. Children navigate the world and understand themselves in ways that, when you grow up, you look back and think, ‘oh my god, what was I thinking?’. You were a child. I promise you, this is normal behaviour as bizarre as it may seem looking back now you’re older. You don’t need to let this define you, dear god! There’s so much more to your history than that moment. If we all defined ourselves by the actions of our childhood self, we’d all be mortified and ashamed. Just look forward and try and focus on what’s most important, whether that’s school work, friends, family! It doesn’t matter whether intrusive thoughts interrupt, you can live your life with these intrusive thoughts. Try some ERP, and avoid compulsions at all cost - whether that’s trying to find things from your childhood that make you ‘normal’, or coming on here! I’m sending my love, I hope you can grow from this❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
@annonymous I’m so glad I could help, even if it was just a bit. I understand, that’s still curiousity I promise you. Trust me, I’ve seen weirder! I understand this was probably reassurance, but it’s important you knew this because I’m sure it was driving you up the wall. Just remember that from now on, letting this memory exist without the need to interfere with it is what’s gonna be most valuable for you! You’re gonna be okay, give yourself time ❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
@annonymous Yes, this is normal. That's why reassurance doesn't work. Try out what i suggested earlier air telling yourself "yup I'm actually a bad person and i knew what i was doing etc" best of luck. Erp really helps
- Date posted
- 3y
you need to just accept the past and move on as hard as it is, there’s no point in living in the past as it’s stopping you from living right now. You need to accept what you done and move on from it, everyone has done stuff they regret from when they were younger.
- Date posted
- 3y
@annonymous I know it’s hard but no one is going to figure out anything unless you were to tell them. You should just forget it and try not think too deeply about it as you said you were young! It would be different if you still felt that way or done it, and if that was the case I’d suggest talking to a therapist but like you said you were a child! You’re not a shitty person
- Date posted
- 3y
Also, i don't think you're bad, we all do stuff as kids that we look back on and are horrified about.
- Date posted
- 3y
You could also try when these thoughts/ memories pop up telling yourself "yup, I'm a terrible person, I'm the worst and should be canceled" and then just trying to let go and not try to ruminate. When it comes back just say it again. That way you're not trying to figure out if you're bad, etc you're letting your brain know that yup you're done with this thought. It's weird but with ocd if you do the opposite of what you think you should do, that's what helps.
- Date posted
- 3y
We’ve all done stupid, horrible things as children. There is freedom in the Lord. Read Romans in the Bible
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
When i was between the ages of 11-18 i was a very mentally ill and hyper sexual kid. I did a lot pf sexting, sent nudes, and even one video of me doing inappropriate things that haunt me to this day. I have changed a lot since then and realized that this was all jn relation to (TW!!) sexual abuse i experienced as a child/teen. I still feel horrible for the things that I have done and think about this daily. I beat myself up because I know it was wrong of me to act that way growing up. Im afraid that someone will find these texts/pictures/videos one day and it will lead to my complete humiliation. I want to throw up at the thought of people i know and love seeing me act that. Its not who I am or who I ever was. I regret that part of my life so deeply it hurts.
- Date posted
- 17w
TW warning: ZOCD, real events, and animal neglect. I feel like if I'm nice to animals or think about having a pet in the future I'm being a hypocrite, one of the things i saw at 10-12 years old because of my porn addiction and exposure were horrible videos involving animals, and i had a kitten at 9 years old, i didn't know the responsibility of having a pet, yet i loved my cat very much and when we couldn't take it to the vet because we didn't have money, it came back with wounds, bleeding, i cried a lot and i regretted so much having been so inconsiderate and dumb to ask for a cat when we didn't have money or the appropiate place to keep it safe. My parents refused to take him to the vet or a shelter, and one day it ran away from home and never came back. I feel like i'll never be able to interact normally or have a pet without being a hypocrite. I'm horrible
- Date posted
- 13w
I'm worried that I sexual assulted or r*ped my dog when I was 17 and I'm 18 now. This memory, has came up multiple and changes rapidly, it says that I was also saying very disturbing things to the dog, calling her good and weird disgusting things like that. I don't know if I can live with myself if this is true.
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