- Username
- Lewis2001
- Date posted
- 3y ago
ok well can I tell u stop searching stuff up, I used to do that and it made everything so much worse ok. and I know how it feels to think your a horrible person but u know you aren't but then your like yes I am. can I tell you that you are not a bad person becuase I know you arent, even though i don't know you in real life. you may choose not to believe me and I understand. I used to get gronial response around my younger brother too you know, I want u to try to occupy your mind with other things that's a step in therapy, try talking to your little brother as apart of exposure. It will only get easier
It’s just so scary I wake up every morning with anxiety to the max and it’s horrible and gronial response but I had a good dream last night about cars as I’m a car enthusiast but when I wake up I feel like this again
@Lewis2001 that's amazing that you had a good dream, I understand the anxiety. Try to maybe talk to your brother it will help with exposure. and have you tried any therapy I think it may be really good for you.
Please stay strong! Think to the future when you don't have these ocd themes. Think about how happy you will be, because you know how hard it is to suffer. That's what keeps me going. We all have endured (in my opinion)the WORST mental illness known to man, so we all know how it feels to hit absolute rock bottom time and time again. Please keep thinking forward, we all want you here. If you need to, please text or call a crisis line. 741741 HOME
It is so hard to try and stay positive I have had a diagnosis but it really does seem like I’ve got ocd and it’s like I’ve got a walk in front of me no matter what I do
@Lewis2001 Maybe talk to your doctor about starting an SSRI for depression? It could help. We are all here with you lewis. This entire community here knows how you feel and what you're going through. Lean on us for support. Try doing something you really love today, and tell your ocd to shove it okay?
what's up
My pocd I don’t want to live anymore
well wana talk about it ?
Yes !!!!!
okk tell me
Well it started last month it first started when I was sat on a random Tuesday night and had a rush of anxiety come over my head the next morning I started to feel like I though I was gay I split up from my girlfriend decided to turn down moving into a flat and moved back home after trying to except thoughs they just carried on it has now went from at this point thinking I was gay to thinking I was trans I was looking up all these things seeing if I was more feminine then masculine then one day I was on YouTube I clicked on a video that was a documentary on pedophiles now all of a sudden my brain keeps telling me I’m a pedophile I stay in a room with my little brother and it’s so horrible being round him I get gronial response even when I’m not around any kids and just can’t seem to shake this out of my head at all it’s horrible now I feel like my brain is trying to convince me that I am even though I feel obviously that I’m not I really am In a bad place the gronial responses are worse when he’s home and it’s horrible I don’t know what to do I keep saying to myself I’m not a pedophile then my own voice in my head says I am it’s horrible 😭
did you notice you stopped worrying about being gay when you started worrying about pedophilia thoughts aswell?
Yes I did ?
@Lewis2001 it just shows how it's an obsession, that's all. It was just a thought but ruminating is the problem.
It feels like I can’t stop thinking about it all day everyday
I completely get it, sometimes you need some happy time to be able to think straight to you know. so try filling your day with fun things even though it may be hard to do them or have fun. I thought about ROCD and POCD all day and still really struggle with it. but it will be ok.
How long have you had this problem pruni
well I've had ROCD for about 1 year, POCD kind of came and went but I've had OCD that I can remeber for about 3 years
My pocd feels constant everyday now
yea I get that, I feel some dats or weeks my ocd consumes my life. it feels as which that I only stop thinking about it when I have something to occupy me but that's ok. I would recommend u try exposure therapy and try do some fun stuff because u deserve it.
It feels like I can’t watch tv play x box nothing without thinking about it
I know. it feels like it comes at u no matter what. i would say try to remember that it can only get better and that other people experience the exact same thing.
@pruni I know I just want it to stop because it feels like it’s so real
@Lewis2001 I completely understand.
@pruni I hate it sometimes it feels like I have an urge aswell but that’s only when I wake up in the morning
@Lewis2001 yea I know I hate the urges part because it make it seem so real.
@pruni But it’s not though and that’s the part I can’t get my head around we are all hear for this battle one that I’m sure we will all win but for now it’s a rollercoaster of a ride 😞🙏
I have started meds but I’m only 9 days into them and have been told that they don’t work until 2-4 weeks later from start date do you have what’s app or any sort that if I need a chat could possibly be able to? If not don’t worry
I see, yeah my experience with meds has been really up and down, make sure ya don't forget to take them one day you'll get groggy 🤣. Unfortunately I don't have whats app but I don't mind talking here :)
Okay that’s fine did you find they take a good while to start working ?
I started on the lowest (5mg) dose of lexapro, i recently upped it to 10mg and I can say the only thing I've noticed so far is a slight increase in motivation. Unfortunately lexapro isnt going to take the intrusive thoughts away, but it'll make the depression a little bit better for ya :) I've been on them for like a month and a half now
I’m on Zoloft I’ve been taking it for only 9 days now haven’t noticed anything different yet
9 days isn't enough time to show a noticeable difference, it'll probably take at least a month
Hi @lewis2001 I’m sorry you are feeling this way. Take it one day at a time you can do it. Please don’t be afraid to reach out to a crisis hot line 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
I’ve finally given up on having friends. No one cares for me as much as I care for them. It’s a horrible feeling. So horrible I’d rather be alone ??♀️.
I am such a horrible person, I cant even try to fight this feeling that I am a bad person, its like I gave up. I just forget my existence. I cant hold this more. I hate myself so much. I just want to end it all.
I just don’t know how much more of this I can take. I’m so fed up of the way my OCD makes me feel, plagued with thoughts that I hate my son, I don’t love my partner, I want to die, my life is pointless. I’m trying so hard, I’m doin ERP, I’m trying to carry on my life as normal but I just feel SO depressed. I am convinced that I am stuck like this forever now, clearly nothing is working and I’m just ready to give up 😢
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