i’m so stuck right now , this does not feel like ocd. my thoughts keep telling me “just come out and be like all those other people”. i hate these thoughts and everything feels so real. i feel like i’m just questioning my sexuality and i don’t want to. this does not feel like ocd it feel so so real. ugh i’m so confused and scared

nothing in particular really triggered my ocd. it was just the thought “what if i’m bisexual “ and my life has been hell since then. i fear that i am questioning my sexuality. all i want to do is be straight but i fear that after ERP i will realize that i am bi. everything feels so real

I was incredibly freaked out as well- i wanted nothing more than to be straight. It was so freaked out that I would gag and could barely sleep or eat for weeks. Everyone’s story is super different I’ve come to learn but as frustrating as this is, it’s a journey and a process and we won’t always have the answers over night. I KNOW your struggle it is truly awful and I always wished nobody would go through that. At least you know you are not the only one with this issue. You are not alone.

I’ve been in the same boat. It feels so real but in reality it is only your ocd talking. Try to take your mind off of it and give yourself some space to breathe(easier said than done, I know). You will get through this!

Have you been diagnosed with ocd by a therapist?

@gonzalmc, yes i have

Has ERP helped any? How long have you had these thought?

i have had these thoughts for almost 5 months and i haven’t started ERP yet but i am soon

Oh good Im glad you start that because that will help manage anxiety around this thought. Did anything in particular trigger you 5 months ago? I guess something that helped me was accepting that i in fact may be into women. It was extremely hard and painful but i eventually came to accept it as a possibility. I pray you take this response well, I don’t want to freak you out anymore. Also, is there any stigma you have about being gay? I feel like realizing that can also help alleviate pressure.

thank you!!

musiclover88, thank you!

@musiclover88 have you fully recovered from this I’ve just started doing self erp the thoughts have slowly subsided but I’ve still lost attraction and my libido is extremely low any tips you could give .

I had this one years ago, and remember reading sexuality is like a scale of 1 to 10. 1 being heterosexual and 10 being gay. Everyone is somewhere along that line, but it is impossible to determine exactly where. Sexuality is really not a black or white thing and like most things trying to find certainty is pointless