- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I had to check your name to make sure I didn't write this. I'm the same, and before I got married, both my father.n.law and Mom told me a 2 different times, are you sure you want to marry. ..you can back out now...(as I was riding in my parents car) on the way to get married. ... I have thought about that off and on for years. I start to ruminate very badly, that I can barley pop out of it. Then I don't know and I question, maybe they knew something I didn't know, even tho at the time I was, why you say that!!! I'm perfectly fine getting married. 37 ys later I still think about it, over and over and over and over... its an awful thought process. I know in the deepest of my soul, I love him and want to be with him , but darn OCD doubting disease rears it ugly head, just when things are goibg great. Idk where I was going with this, but hang in there!!
- Date posted
- 4y
It really is awful, I feel sick with guilt. Im new to this so I've replied in some comments further down too. I'm just really struggling
- Date posted
- 4y
i’m also dealing with this :( you’re not alone.. it’s hard taking on ROCD and unhelpful family members.
- Date posted
- 4y
It's horrible it really is I didn't need them to fill my head with doubts, I was fine before. Now my brain is doubting everything. Doubting if I've given off wrong impressions to the friend that I confided in for him to make a pass at me. Everything I feel sick with guilt even though I did nothing, it was my family putting doubts in my head that have made me spiral into these thoughts
- Date posted
- 4y
@sassyunicornx i get you, i really do. you might not realize it but you’re ruminating right now. just try to take a deep breath, hydrate and try your best to relax. sometimes in order to conquer the demons.. you have to face them. i promise you’re not alone. you did nothing wrong <3
- Date posted
- 4y
It's so hard to confide in people who don't understand the ocd doubting disease. ... I swear some people really like to make things allot worse than they really are. ... as for your family, I think all families have "their" "ideal" of what and who their children and grown adult children should be like and who our friends are. It's so annoying., IMO as long as the person you're dating is safe , kind, gentle and understanding, then that's a good thing and keep getting to know him. Does he know you have OCD? ...
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah my partner knows I have OCD and is the most supportive I just feel so ridiculous and guilty for even doubting us based on other people's nasty opinions. It's really spiralled me. Like I said I went and confided in someone who was suppose to be my friend, he's taken it all wrong and twisted and lied and has now made everything worse for me
- Date posted
- 4y
@sassyunicornx Yeah, there's nothing you can do now other than put out the fires if they circulate.. prob the best thing to do in the future is not say anything to that person , unfortunately , he sounds exactly like the person you don't want to be around or confide in. ... But who knew, he was goibg to be like that anyway... pretty sure this too, will pass. Don't give him any more info, not worth it. Imo, you caught him, he's the one who should be feeling bad for breaking trust. . ... just do nothing , sometimes that's the best thing. Hope you get some sleep soon. I always count sheep jumping over a fence starting 100 backwards. Lol
- Date posted
- 4y
I suffer from ROCD as well, and talking about relational worries or receiving advice can cause me to ruminate a lot. So I feel you, and I’m sorry your friend tried to make a pass and made things more complicated. I’m sure that this is way worse in your head than in reality - something I’ve had to tell myself a lot!
- Date posted
- 4y
I went and confided in someone I shouldn't, he's twisted the whole story and now I'm doubting everything about myself and what happened where as I know deep down I did nothing wrong. It's 1am and I'm struggling to eat sleep, I just feel sick with guilt. My family should have never ever have filled my head with doubts knowing what I've suffered with in the past and for that I feel its unforgivable, this is why I'm in this situation now. I feel like it's best to focus on my relationship and prove the truth to him and distance myself from family members x
- Date posted
- 4y
i’ve been in this situation, just know there is hope and it will pass. don’t talk to that person anymore, it will be hard but you should just remove any and all contact with that person. and ignore your family!!! you know what’s best for you and what you want <3 sending love to you!
- Date posted
- 4y
I had no one to turn to, the two people closest to me were the ones being doubtful and nasty about my relationship I stuck by my guns and said I'm happy. I feel like I was in a vulnerable state, doubting everything because of how they made me feel, and now am regretting ever putting myself in the situation where I confided in a friend of the opposite sex.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 13w
Lately my ROCD has been flaring up, making it difficult to even be around my partner. I’m having so many troubling thoughts with the one that bugs me most being, “maybe this isn’t my OCD, maybe I’m just in a bad relationship and I’m trying to cover it up and blame it on OCD”. This thought really scares me because there are valid doubts in my relationship but my boyfriend and I have openly talked about them and are trying to work through. My OCD won’t take that as an option tho. It makes me feel like I need to be 100% certain that these things can NEVER happen again or else we need to break up immediately. So anything he says in that moment about trying to do better, my OCD will not trust anything he says and just wait until the next “bad thing” happens. When I continuously bring these things up to my boyfriend even tho nothing has happened between these conversations, it exhausts him making it feel like he can never do enough. I feel so bad because I know it’s just my OCD getting in the way. But then that thought creeps in saying I can’t trust him because I need to protect myself. It’s just an ongoing cycle that is so tiring. I don’t even know what I want anymore. We are very opposite when it comes to emotions. I am very in tune and very emotionally intelligent, and he is not. He is the opposite. I do recognize that my anxious attachment style may be hard for him too but I can’t stop thinking about all of his flaws and all of the things he needs to do to make our relationship better. It makes me feel like I’m the only one putting in effort when in reality that is not true. But my OCD does make me feel like he doesn’t really love me or want to be with me and that he feels forced to be with me or do things for me. It makes me feel like him being with me is like a chore. Can anyone relate? My OCD just makes me feel like I can’t trust anything he says to make our relationship better.
- Date posted
- 10w
I wanted to talk about my experiences with rOCD since I currently do still suffer from it but I know if I talked about them. My thoughts are just gonna get stronger, but I’ll do it for the sake of talking about my experiences to others who feel like they’re alone. I have a very loving relationship actually my first healthy relationship we are currently still dating one year and six months. I would say these intrusive thoughts started to happen once I hit the one year mark with him. Nothing in the relationship has made me think these thoughts, but it just came. Like when my mind tried to make me think I liked another guy other than my boyfriend and that I was losing feelings for him. I started to panic because I knew that my heart belonged to my boyfriend and having thoughts that were against that belief it made me really anxious cause I never had those thoughts before. I was in and out of the care center at my school constantly having anxiety attacks, and it was affecting me day by day. I talk to my boyfriend about it because my mind can never keep secrets from him because then I would feel like that I’m lying to him… my mind just kinda works that way and I believe it’s due to the situation I have with rOCD. Luckily, he was really supportive.. in thoughts I’ve had was what if I don’t like him anymore or if he doesn’t do this does that mean he likes me or if he’s even the one just a lot of doubts about me and him in the relationship. And for anyone who’s experiencing stuff familiar to this you are not alone invalid only what you believe is what is true. And I know it’s gonna be hard to know what’s true or not because these thoughts that you have versus what’s in your heart you get confused but if you know that you love that person then that’s what true. Also, the only reason why it affected me a lot was because I kept trying to solve it and the only solution is to let those thoughts in and accept that you have those thoughts. I don’t mean as an accept that these thoughts are true, but accepts that those are the thoughts that you’re thinking because if you keep on trying to find a solution to remove them, it only just get worse.
- Date posted
- 7w
If anyone can maybe relate or offer advice if this is a normal thought process…trigger warning, I discuss breakups in this post. My boyfriend and i have been together for 3+ years. Over a month ago, we got into the worst fight possible where we actually broke up for a week. During the week I felt we were broken up but had the hope we were going to work things out - and then I come to find out he didn’t think we were broken up but just taking time apart. Anyways, I went to a party with my friend and my boyfriend and I’s mutual friends. Keep in mind, during this entire time I didn’t know if we were getting back together and for the first time in our relationship I had true doubts. Anyways, one of their friends I hadn’t met before walked in and I met him and thought he was cute. No big deal right? But then I remember having a thought of “maybe this was supposed to happen, you meet someone else and this is the universe telling you that”. I kind of remember brushing the thought off and I barely spoke to that guy the entire night/didn’t even have interest in chatting with him. Honestly didn’t even bother me. Now over a month later, I’m worried about this thought and feel GUILTY over it. Like, is that a normal thought to have while going through a potential breakup? Does that make me a bad partner? (Because now things are back to being great with my boyfriend). Dare I say it makes me feel like I cheated somehow, when literally it was just a thought. If anyone maybe can offer insight I’d so appreciate it. I feel like that was a normal thought to have given the circumstances but idk.
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