Hey guys. Trigger warning Soooo I had sexual orientation ocd where I was worried I was truly a lesbian. Now that obsession has stopped bothering me and I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m bisexual! Totally okay with that except now my ocd is telling me that the only reason why I think I’m bi is because this obsession has convinced me I’m bi! Woohoo what fucking hell! Yeah, and now I’m suffering from pocd. And since my sexual orientation ocd kinda sorta had some truth to it, I’m terrified all my other obsessions do too! I don’t want reassurance. I just want to know if anyone has any similar experiences to this and how you dealt with it. The anxiety is making me lose sleep and is burying me in my depression.

Use the same strategies if you have seen a therapist or a psychologist. If not it sounds like you definitely need to go to one

Okay, I'm sorry if this counts as reassurance, but before I knew I had ocd I was super worried I was a lesbian too (I definitely had a crush on a girl it was undeniable) and also came to the conclusion I'm bi. But just because one of those obsessions of yours turned out to have truth to it does NOT mean the others do as well, your ocd is just feeding on that worry and possibility. I also have pocd and it's the worst thing I've ever gone through. But being bi feels okay, and being a P does not. It goes against our morals, it goes against our very beings (don't let ocd take this and twist it around to worry you that it somehow doesn't go against your morals) and personally I believe the two issues are COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. One was a worry for me because I live in a homophobic family, the other is a worry because it's what I consider to be the worst thing I could possibly be. Yeah, I didn't like not knowing for sure what my sexuality was, but that is a totally different worry than pocd. I have wondered and worried about the same things you do and I am here to talk i you ever want to

Also if you are able to see a therapist, I definitely would recommend it. At first I didn't believe it was helping but it honestly really was. I stopped going because of anxiety but am considering going back again

i also have obsessions about my sexual orientation. it's done alot of damage but I'm working through it. I personally identify myself as bi but I don't talk about it to anyone who doesn't know that I've dated both men and women. it's my skeleton in the closet that I obsess over in my own head. thank you for sharing because I know now I'm not alone!

I never had HOCD but I am attracted to men, and it’s help feed my POCD because for years I never really “knew” I was queer. I mean, I would have sexual responses to men but I truly believed I was straight. And honestly, I had crushes on girls and even masturbated thinking of them. I look back now and realize how forced it mostly was, but it scares me because, if I could go alllll those years thinking I was one thing and believing it, am I doing the same now?

Not exactly the same situation, but I totally feel you

I relate to all of this so much! So honestly, if it's any comfort, just know you guys are NOT alone. I'm right there with you

@gonzalmc I'm so sorry, I wish I had good advice for you. I think doubt is normal in a relationship, though, asking yourself "is this what I want?" Every relationship is going to have a little bit of doubt mixed in there, it's natural. It seems like you really do care for him. Maybe you could get back together but tell him you need to take things a little slower? Also it might help to post this on its own thread and tag it with relationship ocd, then other people with rocd might have much better advice than me haha. Wishing you the best x

Thank you guys. I appreciate your comments. And T, stay strong. Pocd is, in my opinion, one of the hardest obsessions to go through and heal from.

Yeah, I have sexual responses mainly to women so it’s like yeah maybe I identify as bi now but I’m really a lesbian. But I’ve accepted the uncertainty and I’m totally cool with my orientation being queer or straight. But I totally feel you on how you tell yourself that you were in denial over this so you must be in denial over everything else you obsess over. Ocd sucks. I doubt whether or not I even have ocd. Like, can we get a break?!

T- I was afraid I was gay since I was a little girl. The fear went on and off throughout my life and now I realized I am bi as well. So my biggest fear has some truth to it as well. I have accepted I am bi and am okay with it. However, I have been dating an amazing man whom o think I love and was planning on moving in with and have been thinking “ I want a women” it feels 100% real. I broke up with him and feel like I need to figure out if that is really what I want or if it’s just a thought. This is awful because this would be the 2 man I would lose bc of this HOCD fear. Now that ive had some space I think I do love him and want to be happy with him but then immediately after I have “ i want a women” this is ruining my life. I can’t keep going back and forth like this.

Will do thank you :)

Do any of you guys also experience depression after the spikes? Right now I feel so low because of these obsessions. They’re draining