- Username
- horchata_
- Date posted
- 5y ago
Tbh, if I were you, I would start looking for a new job asap. Do everything possible to avoid babysitting in April. Your health is so vitally important.
Your health is a priority. Tell them you are not available in April (if they ask why, a little white lie won’t hurt)
The dementia one would be the best. Nobody’s going to get mad over a sick old lady, right? I wish you luck ??
Thanks guys. I am going to tell them I can’t do it. Now I just have to figure out how to say it ?
If I were you, I’d say that I’ll be out of down in April
Considering that I agreed to this months ago, I don’t think that’ll cut it. Why would I plan to go out of town when I have this commitment? The problem is that I agreed to this in like January. I always knew they were taking their vacation in April. I have the dates set aside in my calendar. It’s like a whole 18 days of the parents being gone and me with the two kids. I agreed to it but then I spent a week with them when they’re parents were out of town and it was just horrible for me. I didn’t mention it when they came back because I figured if I made it through 6 days, I can I make it through 18. But I’m already so anxious and dreading it. I’m anxious and dreading even going to tutor them every day. The little one is a nightmare just for any babysitter because he’s spoiled and rude and has this rich entitlement thing going on and on top of that he’s clingy af. All of that on top of intrusive thoughts is too much too handle. I realized all this not last week, but the week before. And I’ve just been holding on to this for a week wondering if it’s too late to get out of it but I mean I obviously have to get out of it... I’m not gonna last 18 days.
Maybe say there has been a family emergency and you need to go out of town? I’m not sure, I’ve never been in a situation like this before. Is there a chance you will feel better about the situation in a week or so?
Probably not. I’m off my meds and I’ve emailed literally every therapist in my city that specializes in OCD in my area and they are not accepting my insurance. My shit’s kind of wilding out rn lol I’m between two excuses right now: It’s too hard on my own kid and he begged me not to do it anymore Or My grandma has dementia so she’s coming to live with us These are half lies but it’s the best I can come up with. Idk
Thanks dude!
TW POCD Babysitting those kids that aren’t mine again. This time for an entire week. Mine is here too but I’m used to him. at home he has his own room and that helps me at night when the thoughts come because he’s in his room and I’m in mine and I can forget about it. He’s eight. In this house, the little one is six and the older one is fourteen. The little one knows how to dress himself but he can’t take a bath on his own because he doesn’t know how to wash his hair. I was almost tempted to have him wear some swim shorts in the tub but that would’ve been ridiculous. I closed my eyes and focused on washing his hair. He doesn’t like to sleep alone. This is a problem because I don’t want to sleep in the bed with him. I don’t even like to sleep in the same bed as my own kid. I know I won’t sleep because I’ll be busy with compulsions. The first night I slept with my back to the kid and my hands on a fist, while my kid slept in pull out bed. The second night I made them sleep in the bed together while I took the pull out bed. We are on night number three and the little ones fell asleep on different beds. I opted for the pull out bed my own kid fell asleep on. I have three more nights to go after this. The older one will not stop making “that’s what she said” jokes and I’m the only she in the house. This is mentally exhausting.
LONG POST: Can someone help me by answering this? I’ve had intrusive thoughts before but I used to just push them away. In September, I had intrusive thought about life after death and it sent me into a spiral of fear and anxiety. I had trouble falling asleep and focusing during the day. I went to see a therapist a month later. It was a walk-in session and they told me to do CBT. Accept uncertainty and move on. This gave me even more anxiety. Eventually, with meditation, i was able to keep the thoughts at bay. Then in December, I began to have intrusive thoughts about my sister. They were sexually disturbing and I even wished that I could have intrusive thoughts about death again. I then it switched to sexual thoughts about my brother and he’s only a kid so I feel even more disgusted by myself. It’s been like this for three months now. I’ve tried meditating but it’s not doing much. I’m ashamed to tell my parents and I don’t know what to do. I’m afraid I’ll act on the thoughts all the time. Then I wonder if I actually want to have them. It’s so draining. I hate waking up each day to these thoughts. I wonder if I actually want to have them since I have had them for so long. I’m so frustrated with myself.
Pocd trigger Trying to quit my babysitting job is proving a lot harder than I thought it would be. No one is understanding and I’m not about to be like “ITS BECAUSE I DONT WANT TO MOLEST THE KIDS” cause then people would really be like wtf... so I say it’s my ocd and they’re like so what? The kids make you too anxious? Nahh you don’t understand it’s not the kids it’s that I have thoughts about molesting them and id rather not. High key fuck this shit I don’t even know what to do anymore and these parents aren’t trying to make it easy for me to quit
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