Why is it wrong for someone with OCD to seek reassurance? Does it really prevent us from learning how to tolerate stress?

Yes, it makes the intrusive thought stronger and your OCD. No matter how much reassurance you seek or other compulsions you do, OCD is never satisfied. It will always demand more and more. If you resolve one issue, OCD loves to say "Yeah, but what about _________

It doesn’t help trust me! I tired this for months and it just made it worse! You never get the answer your looking for bc once you get an answer your brain makes up more stuff!

It's wrong because it only make syou ok in the moment. It soon becomes an addiction and you can't feel like you can function if you don't get it after an ocd episode. It prevents you from dealing with future thoughts you get. For example, my compulsion to get relief is confessing. Every time I confess an unnecessary thought, I feel good cause it brought me reassurance. But, then I get a new thought. Anxiety comes back stronger and I know I won't get relief until I confess again. Getting constant reassurance doesn't allow you to get used to the anxiety. Pretty soon, you can't deal with it on your own and you will always need reassurance for comfort, which can affect your future, relationships you may have, or people around you.

Something I learned going through NOCD, as well as through webinars and education on OCD is that there is never an answer that satisfies ocd. Ocd is called the doubting disorder for a reason. Therefore reassurance may help in the short term but long term it does not. Also, do you really need to reassure yourself!? This is a perfect time to as I like to say "practice" ERP. Practice not analyzing any of that and place your attention on this present moment. Go for a walk, read, go hangout with a close companion, or play a sport. Not avoiding the discomfort, but choosing to do things you want to do and not give any attention to dwelling.The most important part being the response prevention. Not easy, but part of the work. When this type of situation occurs and we are in environments in which we are organically exposed to distress, use this as an opportunity to practice doing the work! This allows for two things; showing yourself you can handle and tolerate it, and also letting your body know that although you feel uncomfortable you are willing to keep doing whatever it is you are doing and getting on with your day! This is the foundation!