Why does Rocd have to push me so hard?? Why do i have to be afraid all the time that i will be abandoned or betrayed??? My mind is creating scenarios over and over again so i ask.for reassurance from my husband even for the smallest details...its a torture because i feel anxious, doubtful and guilty as I don't show trust and feel like a sick person...i want it to leave me at last, it's like living with your enemy inside your head every single second...help guyyyys!!!

Feel you! I even question my own love for my partner... and I'm always feeling guilty for even thinking about that! But trust me, keep asking for reassurance; makes only things worse! For you is an hour of peace, but you are putting doubts in your partner... at least that happened to me! At the end; the boy that I loved break up with me because I was too scared to loose him... now I found another guy; wich is even better; and I'm trying so hard to change the ending!! Didn't meant to judge you or anything, just telling my experience. Maybe for you can be different! Hope so!

I’ve just had a long discussion with my partner after a huge argument caused by this exact thing. I doubted him and it made him really angry to the extend of blocking. Seeing that this is a pattern for me, i’m going to try going cold turkey on all reassurance seeking behaviours, become aware of all my triggers so I know in advance and can prepare for it when they come (because trust me, they are always gonna exist until you heal) and i’m going to put full blind faith in him. Ask yourself this question, Would you rather live with the regret that you pushed him away with your doubts? Really think hard about this, imagine your life without him, him leaving you because he couldn’t take your mistrust any longer. Would you be able to live with yourself? Would that regret ever go away? Now to the next scenario...orr, would you rather live with the regret of putting full blind faith and trust in him, and have him cheat on you. Knowing full well that you did nothing wrong and it was him who cheated. In both of these scenarios, full trust or no trust, he can still cheat. So basically both of these scenarios he can still cheat if he wants, no amount of protection or amount of trust will determine that. Therefore, which regret would you rather have? For me it’s definitely option 2. I’d much rather lose him by fully trusting, than lose him by my own lack of trust. Hope this helped, it really helped me

You are right in what you say but even if I try hard i still do the same rituals even though i know they won't really help me. For the time being i don't ask always for reassurance but i ruminate a lot in my mind and feel insecure. I definitely know that it's better to trust fully someone than be afraid and doubt. I hope i will make it stop wondering and being afraid... totally rumination and reassurance are not the solution.

We can help each other since we both have the same thing

Do you want to talk somewhere else where maybe I can try help you daily, especially when you’re having tough days?

I’m thinking a whatsapp group will suffice

we can create a community

It’s hard to do it on this app, if you could create groups on it I would

@zoed, what would you be comfortable using?