- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Feel you! I even question my own love for my partner... and I'm always feeling guilty for even thinking about that! But trust me, keep asking for reassurance; makes only things worse! For you is an hour of peace, but you are putting doubts in your partner... at least that happened to me! At the end; the boy that I loved break up with me because I was too scared to loose him... now I found another guy; wich is even better; and I'm trying so hard to change the ending!! Didn't meant to judge you or anything, just telling my experience. Maybe for you can be different! Hope so!
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you for the response! I know i am harming my relationship but i hope my husband will always try to understand and stand by me... hope he won't leave me as we have a love based marriege and have been through many difficulties...
- Date posted
- 3y
I’ve just had a long discussion with my partner after a huge argument caused by this exact thing. I doubted him and it made him really angry to the extend of blocking. Seeing that this is a pattern for me, i’m going to try going cold turkey on all reassurance seeking behaviours, become aware of all my triggers so I know in advance and can prepare for it when they come (because trust me, they are always gonna exist until you heal) and i’m going to put full blind faith in him. Ask yourself this question, Would you rather live with the regret that you pushed him away with your doubts? Really think hard about this, imagine your life without him, him leaving you because he couldn’t take your mistrust any longer. Would you be able to live with yourself? Would that regret ever go away? Now to the next scenario...orr, would you rather live with the regret of putting full blind faith and trust in him, and have him cheat on you. Knowing full well that you did nothing wrong and it was him who cheated. In both of these scenarios, full trust or no trust, he can still cheat. So basically both of these scenarios he can still cheat if he wants, no amount of protection or amount of trust will determine that. Therefore, which regret would you rather have? For me it’s definitely option 2. I’d much rather lose him by fully trusting, than lose him by my own lack of trust. Hope this helped, it really helped me
- Date posted
- 3y
You are right in what you say but even if I try hard i still do the same rituals even though i know they won't really help me. For the time being i don't ask always for reassurance but i ruminate a lot in my mind and feel insecure. I definitely know that it's better to trust fully someone than be afraid and doubt. I hope i will make it stop wondering and being afraid... totally rumination and reassurance are not the solution.
- Date posted
- 3y
We can help each other since we both have the same thing
- Date posted
- 3y
Can I talk with you guys too? I understand what do I do wrong, but still don't know how to fix it :(
- Date posted
- 3y
Do you want to talk somewhere else where maybe I can try help you daily, especially when you’re having tough days?
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m thinking a whatsapp group will suffice
- Date posted
- 3y
I don't have WhatsApp and really not very comfortable with internet and apps! Is there any other way??
- Date posted
- 3y
we can create a community
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s hard to do it on this app, if you could create groups on it I would
- Date posted
- 3y
Maby because it could be a little dangerous... for example I shouldn't complain about my doubts; or they could get worse! But I can't help it! At least; i'm not doing with my half!🤩
- Date posted
- 3y
@zoed, what would you be comfortable using?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
How do you guys get past the anxiety? I feel like my thoughts are the only thing that control my mind. So often I feel like I should just leave my partner even tho I love them so much because I just feel like these thoughts are too much. I over analyze everything. I feel so stuck and defeated. I just want to be normal. I feel so toxic for the thoughts that I have
- Date posted
- 22w
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
- Date posted
- 21w
My rocd is spiraling so bad i feel like I’m terrible and can’t recover 😓 idk wuts real anymore yet ik i never wanna leave my man😓whats wrong w me
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