So I have been working with exposure therapy for the past couple days and I think it's going good. But I have a question for those that suffer from relationship OCD. Now the thought "I don't love him" isn't about my husband... I'm gonna feel terrible for saying this but it's about my own son. He's my only baby and he's 7. I know deep down I love him more than anything but small things trigger me and makes me think I don't. Like tonight I'm forgetting some good memories and some things I feel like good mothers would never forget. Is this common? I'm freaking out here.

Hi everyone, this is giving me so much anxiety even saying this out loud because my OcD is telling me that somehow someone will know who I am on here and report me this goes with what I’m about to say about my irrational stuff. Since my baby was born I’ve had a lot of majorrr anxiety about him getting sick. From there my postpartum ocd spiked. I had this irrational fear someone would falsely report me as a bad mom and I’d get my baby taken from me. I’ve NEVER had anyone tell me I’m a bad mom, as a matter of fact, almost every day I get praised for how good of a mom I am. My child is so loved and taken care of. So why did I have that fear? it CONSUMED ME. Obsessively cleaning my house in case a social worker came. Stopped posting myself having occasional girls nights out for dinner because I thought one of my followers would think I’m a bad mom for getting a break. Not being able to talk about ANYTHING or send pictures of my baby to family and friends to update them since we live out of state because somehow I thought I would say something wrong or do something that would make someone think I’m a bad mom. I was convinced my baby was gonna be taken for zero reason. I still sometimes catch myself over analyzing myself and what I say because I don’t want to say the wrong thing and someone think I’m not a fit mom. I would even replay every scenario I remember and then second guess myself if that really happened or if I said something or not and freak out and spiral from there. with driving, if I go over a speed bump I have to double check it wasn’t magically a person. Then I panic even though I know for a fact it was a speed bump. I hate living like this. I feel crazy. I don’t open up because I feel like I’m the only person in the world. The one time I opened up about driving it was used against me. I feel like I’m drowning and I’m failing as a mom. I don’t even open up to a therapist about my irrational fear about baby being taken bc I don’t want them to think I’m a bad mom. It just doesn’t stop.

Recently i got stuck in a loop with a terrible intrusive thought about my boyfriend. it’s been rattling in my mind and i feel disgusted and scared and like an evil horrible person. i keep saying things like “intrusive thoughts attack who/what you care about the most” but i think my compulsion (researching; looking up ocd intrusive thoughts and watching others experiencing the same thing) had made it hard to believe that. Im not super concerned about the harm portion because im beating it but now its turned me numb towards my boyfriend after feeling so guilty and scared and everything. i just don’t know what to do its like my body and brain is trying to push me away. we also spend every single day together so im wondering if maybe thats why its so bad? like i feel AWFUL. and i cant stop crying and i havent told him any of this because i don’t want to scare him or make him think im crazy. any tips or words would be appreciated.

I’ve never really been diagnosed with OCD, I’ve had some symptoms but I usually just brushed it off. But recently, I’ve been feeling some sort of numbness to my partner. It upsets me, because our relationship is great and he’s done nothing wrong. I feel terrible for feeling like this. At first I thought it was me “falling out of love”, but I know I love him. It hurts me to think of life without him, it hurts me to think of never seeing his smile or feeling his touch or hearing his voice again. I know I love him. But for some reason I keep convincing myself I don’t. And its so confusing, because what if it’s not OCD and these are actual thoughts I’m having? But then how could I ever think like that when I know I love him? Is this normal? I want to be with him, I want him to be my husband one day and the father of my children. I want to be his wife. So why do I feel like this? Is something wrong with me? It hurts me to think that I might not love him, like it genuinely makes me cry, because I know I do love him, I’m just so confused. Any advice is appreciated.