- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
This is common because OCD is a doubting disease. You can doubt everything in your life if the OCD deems it an open spot to attack. It's our brains at war with other regions of our brains.
- Date posted
- 3y
I also have feelings of not sure if I love my husband and it feels so horrible. I haven’t spoken with a counsellor yet about it. How do I know if it’s rocd or not? Sorry you’re feeling this way!!
- Date posted
- 3y
Ok I will get a therapist to talk to. Thank you for sharing!❤️
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes it is torture! We will get better and will look back later on and this will all be a memory.
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes me too!💜
- Date posted
- 3y
Ok thank you. Just wanted to make sure this was a normal thing.
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm so sorry you have to go through this. My therapist told me I will know it's rocd because that's the form of ocd that attacks the most important relationships in our lives. You relationship with your husband is important to you so it may be that causing some distance in your mind. Just like my relationship with my son. I hope you find the help you need and deserve. No one deserves to suffer this way.
- Date posted
- 3y
Oh ok well that makes sense!! Do you do rituals or anything when you get these thoughts because I don’t do any rituals. That’s what makes me think what if it’s not rocd. Do you have any triggers or are you thoughts just there like always in your mind? I hope you don’t mind me asking you this lol.
- Date posted
- 3y
Of course I don't mind. Any way I can help. I had rituals but after starting exposure therapy I found out they were doing more damage than helping. I have some triggers like when I'm trying to remember a good memory from when my son was smaller and can't remember or when he's at a sleepover and I feel like I don't really miss him. Those tend to make me think "well maybe you don't love him". If those happen I try to get on here and do a quick therapy session or try to sit with the thought until it's gone. Just sitting with it and watching it fade takes the power away from it. I would suggest that you find a specialist that works with ocd. Mine has helped me so much.
- Date posted
- 3y
No problem at all. I hope you get through this. Like I said no one deserves to suffer through this torture.
- Date posted
- 3y
That's right we will!! That's gonna be a wonderful day! I cannot wait!
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Hi NOCD community, I was hoping to get some advice from fellow sufferers. In December we welcomed the first baby into the family, my beautiful niece. Since then, my POCD has been awful, which I know is probably very normal. Last week, in the middle of a very high stress day in my family, I was changing my niece and as usually happens, I got intrusive thoughts about awful things people do to babies when changing them. The thoughts were so harrowing to have as I was also changing her at the exact same time, and I felt my hands just quickly want to finish patting her dry before putting her nappy on, and for some reason, my heart dropped with that hand movement, because I was afraid that I had acted out the awful thoughts in my head, in a moment of mania because my morals, values and heart do not align with abuse of any kind, especially to children. My niece is my everything, and I know I would never want harm to come to her in any way, shape or form. I love her endlessly. I am having therapy, but have only had a couple of sessions. But, I cannot shake the 'what if'. I am tortured over trying to remember what it was I did that made my heart drop, but I can't, and its getting fuzzier and fuzzier the more I try to remember. Could anyone offer any advice on this please? Thank you.
- Date posted
- 19w
I’m really anxious because I know my ocd is really bad right now so I shouldn’t try to figure it out cause my thinking is a mess but I’ve been having feelings of like I’m not sure if I love him anymore or worrying that I haven’t felt a lot like numb (a lot because ocd has been getting worse and worse) and thinking of like how I’ve been focusing on the negatives and only been looking at him through that lens and analyzing and also feeling like I don’t want this anymore. Basically just like negative thinking in feeling like I’m really scared it’s that it’s I don’t love him cause I don’t want it to be over and the thought of having someone replace him makes me ill. But like it feels like I’m not seeing him how I used to and it makes me upset. Today I was near someone I was like oh this person is cute and then I was thinking that the possibility of meeting someone new sounds exciting and now I’m freaking out because this in combination with feeling like maybe I don’t love him anymore is bad. Also my thoughts keep changing. and like sometimes it feels like I don’t care at all and this has happened but like worst it’s ever been and then other times I’m like I do care I do still feel. I’m just really anxious has anyone else felt this before and it was still ocd? 😭😭
- Date posted
- 18w
I know it’s long but plz read :( have been having really bad ocd about my relationship and my partner and it has gotten worse and worse over the span of like about nine months I’d say. I do acknowledge there are flaws and legit issues about him and the relationship like there are with anyone but I also know ocd has clouded my judgement and perception by analyzing everything and compulsions. For a while I kept feeling this need to get out which I know was ocd. I was really scared to spend the weekend with him because I thought I would just be annoyed and irritated cause it’s been that way for a while but he also was going through a period of high stress so maybe I was resenting him for that and I also wasn’t communicating how I should have been when I was upset because I’ve done that too much in the past. This weekend I was told in therapy to just be in the moment and not have to worry about trying to answer the question of do I love him or should I break up. It did help but It’s weird cause this weekend ended up better but I also was kind of numb? Like I was enjoying myself but didn’t feel what I always have felt in the past? Anyway, I am really anxious because i feel like if I loved him I would be supportive of when his parents compliment him or when he does well at something when instead all I think of are that I’m not happy or annoyed because of things he does that upset me or make me mad and it’s like that’s the only way my brain wants to see him as a person. Or when he is upset it feels like I don’t care like I used to because I think of how he doesn’t deserve this when he does this or he shouldn’t have this when he is like this etc. Why does my brain automatically go there? That’s horrible! I feel like I should be excited for him, rooting for him. But it also feels like I do care for him? But my thoughts keep changing. I am afraid I only am with him because I love that he loves me and how he treats me. This makes me feel selfish cause I can’t do that. I notice I still like when he cuddles me and is sweet to me and does fun things watching movies etc. And that’s not how it used to feeel which scares me because I don’t want to be without him. I also love his parents am I only with him cause of how his parents treat me? I feel so selfish and like I have to tell him and break up with him cause it’s the right thing to do. I never used to feel like this. I’m scared. Is it possible I’m just I’ve been mad and resenting how it’s been cause he’s been stressed mix with my ocd? My therapist said relationships can go through phases. Can I fall back in love with him again? I feel like I have to try to start with someone else like this is too far gone. I don’t want to stay in something where I don’t feel toward him the way I want to but I really don’t want to leave him. I feel like such an awful person cause he doesn’t deserve this and is so caring and loving despite everything the major thing that bugs me is how he gets irritable a lot which is an imperfection that makes me get anxious and question him😭 trying not to read into this and just follow what the therapist said but this is scaring me because I feel like if I loved him I wouldn’t think like this or feel like this.
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