Is anyone else obsessed with being percieved as "good" ? I get super anxious thinking people think badly of me and always try to make people have a good image of me but then i obsess over if im manipulating them to think that im good and im lying and are not really a nice person. Anyone ?

Username: Brian K.Brian K.

User type: NOCD Alumni

Date posted: 3y ago

Right there with you. For me it’s I think more of me subconsciously seeking reassurance by overly being nice because my ocd had me doubt nonstop whether I am a a Cru ally a good person or straight up try to convince me I’m not so I tend to people please to show it I’m not instead of just sitting with the doubt and telling it so what if they think that, doesn’t change who I am one bit or diminish my worth. Similarly my OCD/anxiety doubt will often hinder how I act in public typically because of fear of being perceived negatively by people, so I tend to be more restraint. Again I should just let the thoughts go and neither dwell or try to disprove/seek assurance on them but just tell them so what and go about my day and not let them rule me, which is easier said than done.

Username: JanajanaJanajana

Date posted: 3y ago

I feel you.

Username: em.jemem.jem

Date posted: 3y ago

I have the same thing! That’s not my main obsession, but it still bothers me a lot! I always get worried that what I type in a text or email or what I say comes off as rude. And then when I get bad thoughts I think, “They believe I’m a good person, but that’s just the outside. On the inside I’m actually really mean!” And then my anxiety surges and my self-esteem plummets. I’ve been working on sitting with the anxiety and being uncertain if I am coming off as “rude / mean” or not.

Username: Brian K.Brian K.

User type: NOCD Alumni

Date posted: 3y ago

Ditto. I have spent so much type worrying that a type or text gets misinterpreted as rude or makes a loved one or friend mad especially. I used to go back and reread my texts before sending and then reread after as well as any response worrying my intent came off wrong. I do the same with sending and saying to myself so what if it gets misunderstood or comes off as mean or angry or snarky, etc….It’ll either happen or not, either way it’ll be fine.

Username: bassoonista

Date posted: 3y ago

Has anyone else had OCD over a person?? In an ugly, anxious way?? Like obsessing over their appearance and what people think of them because you don’t want them to have any good??? I know that sounds awful and I FEEL awful, but I just can’t help it. Don’t know how it was triggered, but I think it usually starts when I think people are full of themselves/narcissistic... I just feel alone :(

Username: obsessedsom

Date posted: 1y ago

Being perceived

I hate the idea that I have no control over how I am perceived. People make judgements based on their interactions with me, creating an idea of me in their head. They then have the power to share their perception of me with others which may influence how other people view me. This whole idea makes me so anxious and makes me not want to socialize. Is this ocd related?

Username: ninjastone

Date posted: 45w ago

I deal with Obsession (with how I affect others)

Truthfully i am just so exhausted from being obsessed with how I affect others in my life. I am constantly questioning if I make their lives better or worse and why. I'm an extrovert and if it seems like I'm positively affecting people when I socialize, I feel on top of the world. But when I can't improve someone's mood when I talk to them I feel depressed and drained. I have this belief that I am intrinsically awful and harmful to be around and I have to be extra helpful and cheerful to make up for it. I think about the problems that everyone in my life struggles with and convince myself that I am the cause of it or making them worse. I isolate, believing I am harmful to others and I am sparing them. When they feel neglected, I panic because I caused them harm when I was trying to save them. I don't want to live like this anymore. In some ways it was easier when I was alone. I just can't stop obsessing about my loved ones in this way. I almost begin to crave abandonment because at least the thoughts would stop coming. Does that make me a bad person? I don't really actually want to be abandoned by my loved ones, but at least I know how to handle abandonment. I don't know how to handle normal loving relationships.

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Is anyone else obsessed with being percieved as "good" ? I get super anxious thinking people think badly of me and always try to make people have a good image of me but then i obsess over if im manipulating them to think that im good and im lying and are not really a nice person. Anyone ?

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