- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
That's OCD talking to you. In this case, you have to accept uncertainty. You don't know someone won't be interested in you once they find out you have OCD. But if you let OCD stop you from trying to really open up to someone and allow a relationship to blossom, you're setting yourself up for a lonely life. I know it's really difficult, but I encourage you to do the opposite of what your OCD wants. Get on a dating app or go out and just meet people--it doesn't even have to be romantic. You don't *need* to be in a relationship, but if dating is something you genuinely want to explore and the only thing holding you back is OCD, then I say go for it anyway!
- Date posted
- 6y
I have similar fears (I’m 18 and my only relationship was in middle school). It not specifically just because I have OCD, but I also have Graves Disease and my OCD makes me think that all these other details about my life would make anyone not want to be with me. I’m seeing a psychologist and it’s very hard to talk about this fear of being alone in life, but I just recently opened up to him about how there was one girl I kind of had a crush on and my OCD latched onto them and resulted in me oversharing and being clingy to the point I pushed them away and ruined our friendship. It’s just so hard to make connections with others when I’m stuck in my head 24/7 and am so afraid of everything entailed with being in a relationship. I WANT to be in one, but my mind just tells me I can’t. Hell I even have a very difficult time just making new friends in general
- Date posted
- 6y
I feel the same way but not necessarily just because of “ocd” but because it has made me feel so.... different and for a lack of better word “dirty”? Not that I feel physically unclean, I just feel like because of how ocd has developed my perception of myself, no one could TRULY love the real me. I’m 19 and have never been in an actual relationship either! (There was a little month-long stunt but I hated it the entire time haha)
- Date posted
- 6y
Yeah I found out that I had OCD when I was a couple of months in my relationship. Once I opened up to her she didn't understand it very much but she was completely supportive. I had that fear that she'd leave me for someone who didn't have a mental health issue. But she didn't she loves me just as much as she did before. Don't let your fears stop you from being happy
- Date posted
- 6y
I'm 19 and I feel the same way. I feel like I have, and am continuing, to miss out on things people my age do. I was never interested and now I just want someone to talk and share my emotions with. Someone that's not family or a therapist. My OCD makes me think I'm to weird to attack someone tho.
- Date posted
- 6y
Hey, I'm 28 and in a happy relationship now, but I can definitely relate to all of these feelings from when I was single - being worried that no one would want me because I'm too weird or crazy, my ocd telling me I'm immoral/dirty/tainted and that I would be tainting anyone who I was with. All I would say is that it's your ocd making you feel like that, but when the right person comes along you will be fine - you deserve love and you can be in a happy relationship. I was in another relationship before where he didn't get mental health and wasn't that supportive - at the time i tended to think that was my fault, but now I can see he just wasn't the right person. My current partner is super understanding and supportive of my ocd! There's nothing wrong with being on your own but you can still have OCD and have a great relationship ?
- Date posted
- 6y
Exactly, MichaelK!
- Date posted
- 6y
That’s so awesome of him!! It’s so nice that they’re people like that
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
So I’m really struggling to believe that anyone will want to be in a relationship with me and still love me when they find out about my pocd and intrusive thoughts. I am holding a belief no one can love me with this condition and they will be repulsed by me when they find out. I just don’t know how to shake that feeling and be brave enough to try and share with anyone I’m dating.
- Date posted
- 23w
Okay, just wanna start by saying that I don’t have ROCD. I have perfectionism OCD, and I get intrusive thoughts that no one will like me, I’ll lose all my friends, I’ll be alone for life, etc. if I don’t have things “just right.” I feel like every time I like someone, my OCD just gets worse cause if I don’t perform compulsions, I feel like I have no chance with him. Your handwriting wasn’t smooth? Guess your love life won’t be either. The volume of your phone was too low? Guess your chances with him are too. Failed to draw your graph perfectly symmetrical? Guess what else you’ll fail at. It’s honestly exhausting, and that it isn’t even it. I feel like I tend to fixate on my crushes also. I wanna be 100% sure they’re a good fit before making a move, and that’s really problematic cause there’s just no way to know. And even if I deem that they’re a good guy, I STILL won’t do anything cause I always expect the worst! What if the first impression that I make is so bad that he wants nothing to do with me? I put so much pressure on myself to get him to like me back that I’m terrified to make a move. I’m so focused on the prospect of a second convo that I don’t even want to have the first convo! Like rn, there’s this dude that caught my eye. He’s a senior in high school, while I’m a junior. I’m taking AP bio, and he’s taking AP chem—both are 1.5 periods, so I see him in the cafe and during the passing period (we leave the cafe halfway through the lunch period). I purposely plant myself next to him in the halls during the passing period but haven’t worked up the courage to talk to him. He’s single, I don’t have any classes with him this year, he’ll be at college next year, we follow each other on instagram, and my friends have told me that he’s nice (and keeps to himself), so there’s minimal risk in trying to talk to him. Thing is though, every time I think about introducing myself, I just imagine all the ways that it can go wrong. What if he hates me? What if my first impression is actually good and we become friends, but he doesn’t like me back? What if I tell him I like him over messages, and he screenshots my text and posts it on his instagram story? I don’t know what to do. I know that high school is kinda early and that I still have time to figure things out. I’m just worried that I still won’t have things figured out when I need to. Any advice or personal experience would be welcome and greatly appreciated!
- Date posted
- 20w
At this point of my life I barely have compulsions, barely let them control me, but recently I have realised my OCD is still keeping itself alive by holding me back and making me avoid stuff since I cut compulsions. So I don’t do compulsions but I avoid. And when it comes to SO OCD, I avoid dating. I am in the age where it’s the most common thing to do, I have friends who are getting married and I still haven’t seriously dated my entire life. If I date I date to marry. But it’s making it even harder. My brain tells me I can’t date to marry or date at all because no man will accept the possibility that I am bisexual or the fact I might have intrusive thoughts over sexuality. Worse than that, what’s actually holding me back is the fact that in one of our dates I know I’ll have to bring this up. And what if the man will start to get stressed over it? What if it’ll be too much for him and he’ll leave? And worse-tell the people that know both me and him all the personal things I told him about me having SO OCD? I can’t do this.. I don’t want to do this to myself I don’t want to let go of this secret to any man who can just leave me because of it at any point.. that’s what’s holding me back from dating.. and I want to be brave, I want to just go for it, I want to let it go but am too afraid I am just selling myself and my darkest secrets out there for men who can cancel me at any moment. I gave up on dating… it’s all too complicated for me and I have this voice in the back of my head telling me maybe I wasn’t born for it. Maybe I wasn’t born to get married or be in a relationship, maybe I am not good enough for all of this.. and then OCD adds its own stuff.. maybe I am gay and dating would be lying to myself and the men I date.. too much responsibility..
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